


All the Feelings that Words Can't Translate

by Europa_Knight



Category: The Dragon Prince (Cartoon)
Genre: (He'll get there...Give him time), (not that Gren realizes that), Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, Friendship, Gren trying to figure out these new feelings and how he identifies, M/M, Mutual Pining, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Supportive romantic partners, Texting, non-canon ages, teasing but supportive friends
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:07:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 46,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26554837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Europa_Knight/pseuds/Europa_Knight
Summary: After meeting Corvus in Katolis Sign Language 101, Gren could not have foreseen the impact their developing relationship would have on his life.(Fluffy slice of life)Update:Chapters 1-5 have been rewritten - now with 33% more slowburn and 13% more overthinking!Corvus.Other chapters are now broken into shorter bites.Beta:literalpaca
Relationships: Amaya & Gren (The Dragon Prince), Background: Amaya/Janai (The Dragon Prince), Corvus & Kazi & Sabah (The Dragon Prince), Corvus/Gren (The Dragon Prince), Gren & Marcos (The Dragon Prince)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 12





	1. Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Huh,_ it looked like being a TA this semester was going to be much busier than it had been last semester.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **16-Jan** :This is **_Revised - Chapter 1_**  
>  For more information about story changes see the A/N at the end. Enjoy. :)

**Beginning of the Fall Semester:**

His backpack was a boulder and Gren an overeager puppy hauling it across campus.

But carrying each of his text books in his backpack, in addition to his notebooks and laptop, was his typical weight workout for the first day of class, and he was expected to do the same routine tomorrow for the first day of his Tuesday/Thursday classes. Gren didn't even mind the fact that he would probably have some minor back pain later that evening from carrying the books: better to have them and not need them, than to need them and not have them.

Of course, it would be _a little easier_ if the humidity would ease up or if his class, which ended at 11:00, was closer to the class he TAed for, which started at 11:30, instead of at the opposite end of campus.

 _But there is nothing I can do about that_ , Gren smiled to himself with a half-shrug.

Mid-August meant humidity and the class being on the opposite end meant that he could admire the greenery and artwork scattered across campus as he continued to maintain his self-proclaimed 'speed walking record'.

Gren glanced a peek at the black bag dangling from his right shoulder; at least he wouldn't need to carry recording equipment around tomorrow. Unless...maybe he could drop it off in Dr. Fen's office tomorrow morning? It would be easier to pick it up for Wednesday.

 _No…_ it wasn't like he had keys to Dr. Fen's office, and Gren was _fairly sure_ it was against university rules to make an extra set of keys. Besides, recording the class was Gren's idea, one he truly believed would help his fellow students, so if it meant carrying a little extra weight around campus then so be it.

Taking in a deep breath, Gren put all of his nervous/excited first day flutters to use and increased his walking speed to get to the communications building.

It was hard to believe, but it was already the fall of his third year at Queens' Unity University, near the border of Katolis. Being in the accelerated masters program in Katolis Sign Language and Deaf Studies meant that Gren would spend five years in college but come out with a Master's degree in addition to his Bachelor's degree. When this semester finished he would be exactly halfway done with his program and one step closer to his dream of working for the government as an official interpreter.

In fact, the summer had been **_amazing_** for getting him one step closer to his goal. While he had _technically_ known General Amaya since his Junior year of high school from the KSL Youth Outreach and Recruitment Program, and she had been his mentor as he applied and entered college - always available through texts, a video call, or a meal - this summer he had had the opportunity to _work_ _with_ his hero.

The summer internship allowed him to get his first round of security clearances in order to interpret for some of General Amaya's lower-classified meetings. Gren hoped not only to be an interpreter, but _ideally_ in diplomatic work. He wanted to do his part to help bring people together, which was why he chose Queens' Unity University.

Queens' Unity was about an hour away from the historic 'Breach' between the human kingdoms and the magical lands of Xadia.

Even though the 'Orphan Queen' had long ago established peace between Katolis and the Sun Fire Kingdom, bridging the former divide between elves and humans - creating what they now called 'the great peace' - there was still tension among the various elf communities and the outlying kingdoms on the human side. Katolis, Duren, and Lux Aurea had to act as a bridge between the groups both geographically and politically in promoting peace and understanding.

Over the summer, Gren worked in the area just outside the former breach, an ideal location for many military bases, concealed by dense woods. The nearest city, Aditia City - named in honor of the Sun Fire Queen as a symbol of good faith, was a bustling area of commerce, tourism, and learning. It was also where many government centers were located, besides the capital.

Conveniently, Aditia City was where Gren lived, and it was only a half an hour's walk to campus. (Well, a 'half an hour's walk' provided the shortcuts Gren knew and his speed walking record - of course.)

Nearly out of breath, Gren walked into one of the older, smaller classrooms in the university on the bottom floor of the communications department building. Dr. Fen was already in the front and grunted a greeting to Gren with a nod - an improvement from when he first TAed for the professor last semester, and a **_huge difference_** from when he took his class freshman year.

Teaching was Dr. Fen's 'retirement job', his way of 'giving back' to the community. Although, from a student's point of view, he was not exactly a 'sought-after' teacher. To most he was a bearded grumpy looking man with a comb back.

When Gren first took Dr. Fen's class, he had heard many of his classmates whisper comments about his not-so-sunny disposition, and due to his former military career, he was extremely strict about his classroom code of conduct to a potentially intimidating level. But Gren didn't mind a bit of grump because Gren loved Katolis Sign Language and loved helping his fellow students learn it, so when the opportunity arose to TA Dr. Fen's class last semester, he took it.

Not that Gren particularly felt like he helped a lot, mostly in grading homework and the rare visitor to his office hours - typically before the midterm or final, but Gren _hoped_ it helped. For as much as Gren loved Katolis Sign Language he wanted to help _encourage_ that love in his fellow students as well. Bonus that the money earned from being a teaching assistant was enough to cover his basic expenses and allowed the extra money he earned over the summer to be put in a six month CD and applied to his expenses for next semester.

Gren made his way towards the back of the classroom, plopped his backpack on a chair and placed the recording equipment on the desk, quickly unloading it. He set up the tripod, adjusted the camera and zoomed in on the teacher. Gren had proposed this to Dr. Fen at the end of last semester; his idea was to record the lectures and post them on Dr. Fen's website for students who were unable to attend. Seeing the professor's facial expressions and arm movements were important and Gren wanted to make sure everyone could access the material at their own time and pace if needed.

With the equipment set up, and another ten minutes before the official start time, Gren decided to go around and introduce himself to the students who came into class early.

He took a deep breath, ran his fingers through his hair trying to straighten it up, and walked to the nearest student in the back of the class.

Gren lowered himself to be on the same sitting level as the student to establish better eye contact and a non dominating presence. (He didn't want to be standing _over_ them. Gosh, that would come across as intimidating...)

"Hi, my name is Gren, he/him pronouns. I will be the teaching assistant for this class. If you need any extra help I hope you won't hesitate to ask. My email and office hours are on the course syllabus," he explained, saying the same greeting he had rehearsed last night and on the walk to campus this morning.

The student smiled and nodded a quick "thank you" then went back to looking at their phone. Gren maintained his cheerful expression and moved to the next student, who had a similar response to the first one.

As he continued to move towards the front of the class, greeting each student, there started to be _some_ variation in responses. Some students politely waved him off, or maybe told him their name back, a few seemed a little flustered in his presence - maybe shy or nervous about the class(?), but overall nothing too different from last time he TAed.

Gren looked to the front of the class. Only one student sat in the front row, their dark bun standing up straight in the air and Gren guessed that the student must've been looking down. He grinned as he headed over, wondering if the student was reading a book or browsing through a phone. As he lowered himself next to the student's desk Gren felt his expression turn into a wide smile.

It was nice to see another student bring the textbook to class on the first day, just like him.

"It's nice to see you reading through the textbook," Gren said, trying to tone down his smile to something less strong. The student turned to look at him, his facial expression neutral as he blinked a few times and Gren realized it was probably rude of him to just interrupt his reading like that.

"Yes," he said calmly, "My goal is to read a chapter ahead, if possible, so the lectures are a chance for me to solidify my understanding, rather than to learn something new."

"That's a fantastic goal!" Gren said excitedly. "I try to do the same, but it can be difficult as homework and assignments start to pile up across classes. Oh! But I can help! I actually wanted to introduce myself. _Ahem..._ Hi, my name is Gren, he/him pronouns. I will be the teaching assistant for this class. If you need any extra help I hope you won't hesitate to ask. My email and office hours are on the course syllabus," he said, trying to regain his 'professional' tone.

The student's hazel eyes seemed to twinkled in slight amusement as a composed smile slowly spread across his face, "Nice to meet you, Gren; my name is Corvus, he/him. Thank you for introducing yourself. I'm going to need a lot of help this semester because I want to work for General Amaya after I graduate, and I want to be able to communicate with her."

Gren instantly got excited upon hearing Amaya's name. Naturally, many people wanted to work with her, but Corvus wanting to communicate directly with her, instead of relying on a translator, made Gren admire him already.

"Love your drive! I just worked with General Amaya this past summer and she was incredible! Of course, I will do anything I can to help you!"

Corvus grinned back, "Awesome, thanks!"

Dr. Fen interrupted from the front, " _Ahem_ , Gren… It's 11:29 and you know how I feel about the starting time."

Gren nodded and signed "sorry". He quickly pointed out his office hours and email on the syllabus to Corvus and scurried to the back of the class, ready to record.

* * *

Considering this was his first time recording a lecture, Gren felt like it went well.

Now he just had to figure out how to upload it onto his computer…But there were cords for that...It couldn't be that hard... _Right?_

Once uploaded, hopefully it was in a format that was supported by that free editing software he downloaded…Well...It should be. Gren watched videos online that confirmed it...At least, he was _fairly sure_...

Gren sighed, why did he volunteer to do this again? It's not like he was the best with computers.

"Thanks for recording these," a voice said as Gren put the camera back in the case.

Oh, it was that student that wanted to work with Amaya...Corvus? Wow, he had notably good posture. Military background perhaps?

 _Wait_ , Gren mentally shook his head, what was he thinking before?

 _Right_ , helping his fellow students, _that_ was the reason he was taking an unofficial crash course in video recording and editing.

"I hope it will help," Gren replied.

"I think it will," the student shrugged. "Makes me feel better if I can't be a chapter ahead, that I can rewatch the lecture to help solidify the information," he said with a friendly smile.

Gren smiled to himself, as he took down the tripod. "I'm glad," he said softly.

"I wanted to give you my email," the student said as he held out a sticky note. "Just in case it goes to spam," he further explained.

Gren put the folded tripod in the case and took the yellow paper, checking it to confirm his name: _Corvus -_ like a crow.

"Thank you," Gren said then looked at his stuff before deciding to stick it to one of the arms of the tripod. "I'm editing the lecture tonight, so I'll make sure to see it when I open the case," he explained.

Corvus nodded. "Office hours are tomorrow, right? Eleven o'clock? This building?"

Gren nodded, dumbfounded. Considering that no one had shown up to his office hours last semester - except before the midterm and final - to have someone show up on the second day of school was _beyond_ unexpected.

In addition, the manner in which Corvus conducted himself, his tone and how he held himself, he was... _remarkably poised,_ but there was something else…An air around him that made him feel approachable.

"Great, I'll see you tomorrow. Gren, wasn't it?"

Gren regained his composure, "Yes." He fingerspelled his name afterwards just in case: G-R-E-N.

Corvus shifted his weight and placed a closed hand over his mouth like he was in thought, "It sounds like the word _grin_ … which seems to suit you..." he mumbled to himself before nodding once - as if he had committed Gren's name to memory - and looked back at him, "Thanks again, _Gren_ , I will see you tomorrow," he waved before exiting.

"Bye, Corvus," Gren waved with a smile.

 _Huh_ , it looked like being a TA this semester was going to be much busier than it had been last semester.

Gren looked at the yellow sticky note attached to the tripod before closing up the case and grinned to himself.

Yet, Gren looked forward to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **_A/N, Update: 16-Jan_** : I'm all for transparency, so here's the scoop:
> 
>   * I went through and restructured the story :)
>   * Longer chapters are split into shorter, better themed, chapters (which is why the chapter count increased)
>   * Gren and Corvus' parts are now intertwined to be more chronological
>   * If you've read this fic before _**I've now split the original first chapter and a half into five, more elaborated, chapters**_ (another reason why the chapter count increased)
>   * In order to post five chapters at once, the revised Chapter 2-5 chapters are _edited_ but _unbeta-ed_ (when the final versions are posted, I will edit this A/N)
> 

> 
> **The reason:** This story means a great deal to me. It has given me an outlet for my COVID & job-related stress, got me back into doodling, and helped me discover new things about myself. I've had fun exploring these characters and I have learned a lot while writing this.
> 
> As an author, it has been fun to see how this story evolved from a Gren-POV one-shot (with _way_ more 'telling' than 'showing'), to having a "Bonus Corvus" section at the end of each chapter, to switching POV depending on the scene. Me deciding to go back and restructure this story is because I love this story so much and going back allows me to apply those lessons I've learned so the story flows better. ^_^
> 
> * * *
> 
>  **Original A/N:** Thank you for reading.  
> Not sure who is reading this but please: stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. :)  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_ \- Unknown


	2. Office Hours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having a _little_ crush was _probably_ fine...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** I use OC family members for both Gren and Corvus' family and will be mentioned from his chapter onward.

**End of September:**

Gren _tried_ not to smile as Corvus shook his head and laughed to himself.

Even though Corvus was slightly dejected, he wore it with humor, and there was something about Corvus' facial expression that was so...sweet? Endearing? It tugged at the corners of Gren's lips involuntarily and always caused him to smile.

Gren started to reach out to touch Corvus' shoulder in encouragement, but when Corvus straightened up - still chuckling with a small grin on his face, Gren lost all nerve - withdrawing his hand.

"Don't tell me, Gren, I already know. The expression right?"

Gren nodded and raised his hand to cover his mouth - once again stopping himself from grinning.

Corvus half-laughed again as he shook his head, "Thanks for the formality, but you can laugh, or smile or whatever." His cheeks looked a little rosier, perhaps embarrassed? "I don't mind it coming from you," he continued quietly, before looking away with a grin.

"Thanks, Corvus," Gren half-chuckled.

Gren noticed that Corvus' eyes made their way back over to him, so he gave Corvus his best cheeky grin in hopes that it would make him feel better.

It paid off; Corvus laughed a little upon seeing it, a hint of amusement in his hazel eyes, and Gren felt an odd mix of relief and newfound energy wash through him, a gentler smile spreading across his face.

It was now the end of September and, with one exception, Corvus had been the only person thus far to show up to office hours. Gren took it as an opportunity to not only reinforce what was being taught in class but to try to get Corvus more conversational in sign language too.

They would talk about topics you typically would when trying to network and then Gren would teach the vocabulary necessary to say it in KSL, also reinforcing the differences in sentence structure and phrasing.

Corvus was so determined to understand and implement whatever Gren was teaching him that he would often wear a resolute expression - like learning sign language was the biggest challenge he had encountered thus far.

...Which would then carry over to when he was signing, and then his signs were often _off_ because KSL _especially_ _relies_ on your expression matching the intention of the words being said. A deadpan expression with a hand waving over your face saying "surprise" is _very_ _different_ than when you do that same sign with a grin, or even a smile.

Even though it had only been a month and a half, it was becoming increasingly common for Corvus to catch his own expression mistakes and laugh at himself for being so serious.

...And there was something...refreshing(?) about Corvus taking KSL seriously, but not taking _himself_ too seriously. Gren still couldn't quite place the words for it yet. Impressive? Inspiring? All of those?

Part of Gren wondered where and how Corvus learned to approach his mistakes like that.

Did Corvus take _every_ mistake he made with such stride and good humor?  
Maybe Corvus trained himself to do that to make others feel more at ease?  
Perhaps he was like this with anyone when hanging out one-on-one?

Or maybe Gren was successful in creating a safe space for Corvus to practice, and Corvus felt comfortable enough around him to laugh at his own mistakes?

Well, whatever the reason, hearing Corvus' laughter felt... _nice_. There was something about it that made Gren want to smile, or join in. In general, being around Corvus felt strangely easy, fun even.

"Hang in there, Corvus, you'll get it! Expression in sign language is like tone in verbal language - _everyone_ tries to be mindful of it, not just beginners," Gren encouraged with a smile.

Corvus nodded, stretched his back, and refaced Gren - once again looking determined, "Let's try that again."

"There you go, Corvus!" Gren said brightly. "But, y'know…" Gren pointed to the bridge between his own eyebrows and rubbed it a little as a reminder for Corvus to loosen up.

Corvus raised an eyebrow, but got the hint and _tried_ to relax, a small smile on his face.

"Ready?" Gren asked.

He nodded. "How was your weekend?" Corvus signed.

His expression at the end conveyed it was a question, but prior to that Corvus returned to having a more serious look for 'your weekend'. It came across that Corvus was _genuinely concerned_ about Gren's weekend.

"Busy. I read a lot and wrote papers," Gren signed back. "How was your weekend?" Gren tried to model the typical expressions when asking that question.

"Great," Corvus signed, but his face became so serious it came across as deadpan and Gren instinctively brought up a hand to cover his mouth. Unfortunately, air still escaped and Gren made a muffled nasal sound trying to cover his laughter.

Corvus stopped, leaned forward, and laughed to himself, "I _felt it_ that time."

Gren let himself fully join in the laughter, "It came across as deadpan and was _genuinely funny_ in context."

Corvus raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, because deadpan is really important," he said straight-faced.

Gren laughed harder, and Corvus seemed to smirk before looking away.

"General Amaya can be quite cutting with her sarcasm and deadpan, so you're actually a step ahead there," Gren said, placing a hand on Corvus' shoulder in encouragement.

Corvus looked at Gren's hand, before looking back to Gren with a gentle smile on his face. "Thanks," he said softly. He paused for a moment, before taking in a breath and leaning back in his chair, "Okay, let's try this again."

And there it was, that _resiliency…_ Corvus was truly... _amazing_.

Gren promised himself that he would do anything he could to support him. "Okay, from the top," he said before restarting their signed conversation.

* * *

**Corvus - Third week of October:**

Now two months into his first year of college, visiting the generic office used for teaching assistants had become part of Corvus' Tuesdays/Thursdays schedule. He walked into the old communications building, his back straight, head held high, and with all the composure he felt an ROTC cadet should have - unfazed in the face of challenge, always calm, and level headed.

He took the stairs as he started making his way up to the seventh floor of the building.

From what he picked up during his conversations with Gren, all of the teaching assistants in the communications department shared a set of three "TA rooms'' with the person using it switching out depending on the time.

As a result, there weren't any personal items left behind, only some school purchased office supplies, and a few dry erase markers for the _err_ …how did Gren phrase it?...'well loved' white board on the wall. All carefully protected in the locked top drawer of the desk...because wandering office supplies was a concern...apparently.

Overall, Corvus _shouldn't_ be so excited to voluntarily go to a small cramped room which _should_ have all the warmth of wet snow. Yet, somehow, going to the room had grown on him. He even found an unexplainable charm to it now, and _sometimes_ he would even forget his main objectives in going to the KSL office hours.

The primary reasons for Corvus to go were very practical, of course.

 _Practical,_ he reminded himself as he opened the door into the hallway.

Corvus needed to improve his sign language skills if he ever hoped to one day work for _The General Amaya_.

In addition his TA, Gren, had previously worked with her, and seemed oddly certain he could help Corvus meet her.

Academics and networking; yes, _those_ were the reasons he returned to the stuffy office twice a week - the path to the room was practically programmed into his muscle memory: turn the corner, third door on the left.

Corvus entered the room and, although the sitting arrangement was typical, he chuckled to himself to see the ginger haired man sitting on the short side of the desk, not even looking at the stack of papers in front of him, and instead staring out the small window.

While Corvus had already figured out, based on Gren's odd choice of seating arrangements, that he liked to look out the window, this was the first time Corvus had caught him daydreaming.

Gren's body leaned forward on the desk, face resting in one of his palms, and his normally genial blue eyes seemed to be in a daze. There was a softness about Gren's face that Corvus found hard to ignore and the way the early afternoon light caressed his cheeks, trying to hide his freckles, made him look like he was almost glowing.

 _Gren looks so cute, I wish I could kiss him,_ Corvus thought to himself, a grin still on his face.

 _!!!  
_… _Wait!_

Corvus _quietly_ backed out of the room, hoping that Gren didn't notice. His heart was beating excessively fast, and he hoped it was from the stairs earlier.

 _It had to be_ from the stairs.

He looked both ways, making sure the hallway was empty, and rested his back against the wall.  
He just needed a moment.

He inhaled a deep breath, breathing out slowly through his nose.  
_Just a moment..._

Because becoming attracted to his KSL TA was _definitely_ _not_ one of Corvus' goals when entering college. In fact, it was statistically probable to be on someone's lists of things _not to do_.

Corvus sighed, if this was the military, Gren would be a commanding officer in his direct chain of command, and you _don't_ swoon over your commanding officer no matter how adorable their freckles are… or how bright his smile is… or how melodious his laughter is…

Unwillingly, a scene popped into Corvus' head:  
Corvus walking over to Gren, placing a hand on his shoulder, leaning over and kissing his forehead to snap him out of his trance. Gren blinks out of his daze and looks up at Corvus with those clear blue eyes, then gives him a bright smile. "Corvus," Gren would half-chuckle, "You missed." Then Gren would point to his lips and Corvus would lean down and...

 _Nope!_ Corvus snapped himself out of it.

_No, no, no! _

Corvus had worked too hard for his ROTC scholarship, and he had _promised himself_ he would stay focused just on school. _Only_ school. He _couldn’t_ have a crush.

Correction, he _didn’t_ have a crush.

 _Erg…_ why did the word _'crush'_ even pop up in his head?

Corvus sighed and rubbed his temples with his left hand, _It's just Gren._

Mind you, Gren was cute, Corvus had noticed and accepted this fact very early in their interactions, but the 'cuteness factor' shouldn't make a difference. Corvus had found many other people attractive and not resorted to schoolboy daydreams!

Besides, he was only helping Corvus because it was his job.  
They wouldn't hang out outside of office hours. From Gren's point of view Corvus was probably just another eager freshman - nothing special.

Wait...Objectives...He needed to restate his objectives - _refocus._  
The main goal was to improve his KSL so he could work for General Amaya one day.

 _Academics_ and _networking_.

Right, academics and networking.  
Another deep breath, and a relieved smile spread across Corvus' face.

_Everything was fine._

"Corvus!" Gren smiled from the door, "I thought I heard you."

Corvus practically jumped from where he stood. He could feel the hairs on his arm stand on end, which was an accomplishment because he wasn't often surprised.

"Why are you waiting out here? Did you drop something?" Gren continued, seemingly oblivious to Corvus' nerves, and was now looking around the floor to see if he could somehow aid in finding an object.

"No, no, I just needed to take a breather."

A look of concern spread across Gren's face.

Corvus scrambled, " _Err_ , like, _in general_. I mean after midterms, everyone needs a breather, right?"

Why did Gren's look unravel him? _He's a nice guy_ , of course he would show _some_ concern.

Wait! Why _didn't_ he say he needed a breather from the _seven flights of stairs_? _That _would have been more believable… _erg..._

"True...A-and that was your first time going through midterm week. So, I'm sure that's an adjustment too," Gren smiled, and there was a part of Corvus that recognized his own heart was beating a little faster.

_Nope, gotta file that factoid somewhere else - not happening._

"Yeah, I'm glad those are over." Corvus slipped past Gren, catching a whiff of strawberries - probably his shampoo.  
_Erg_ , of course his brain would notice that…

 _Trying_ to ignore his body's reactions and how _aware_ he was of Gren, Corvus took off his backpack, and sat down in his regular spot adjacent to the seat Gren was using earlier.

"So how were your ...mid...terms?" he half-dropped the question as he noticed that next to the stack of papers Gren had in front of him there was a store-bought container of blueberries resting on top of a paper towel.

Gren leaning over the desk had probably hidden it from his view earlier.

"Oh! _Umm_ …y-you mentioned last week that blueberries were your favorite, right?" Gren asked as he sat down, his face looking a little bashful. "Or was that just because it was the easiest to sign? My sister, Embla, used to always say that 'berries' were her favorite thing to eat because was easiest for her to remember," Gren chuckled at the memory.

"No, they _really are_ my favorite..." Corvus said, still in mild disbelief that Gren seemed to have brought berries to his own office hours with _him_ in mind.

 _Networking_ , Corvus reminded himself.

"I just wasn't expecting to see them," Corvus said, voice friendly and level - not at all reflecting the butterflies that had started fluttering in his stomach.

Gren's grin grew a little as he looked towards the berries, "I saw them when I was grocery shopping and thought it might be a nice way to celebrate finishing midterms." He returned his gaze back toward Corvus. "They're from Duren, so they should be good since the berry season lasts a little longer over there, but I haven't tried one. I didn't want to start until you arrived," Gren smiled and Corvus' heart melted a little further.

"So, _umm_ , do you _always_ buy your students something to celebrate midterms?" Corvus asked, hoping Gren couldn't hear the hopes that seemed to spill into his tone.

Gren laughed, a sweet sound, "Funny, this is my second time being a teacher's aid, but I never really thought of anyone as being ' _my_ student'. I'm just a student helping other students, and… y'know, grade homework on the side." Gren gestured to the papers, neatly piling them up and moving them further away on the desk.

"And record classes," Corvus pointed out. "And edit those videos, and post them on Dr. Fen's website," Corvus continued, leaning in with a grin, no way he was going to let Gren sell himself short.

Gren's cheeks turned a light shade of pink as he opened the container - making his face look impossibly more adorable. "Okay, so I'm a student who _really_ enjoys helping out other students, but it's not selfless. I do get paid, so I really need to give it my all."

Corvus smiled while grabbing a handful of blueberries, "Well, I learn a lot from you." He risked a glance up.

Gren's eyes were warm and beaming with pride, "I'm glad to hear that. Of course, that's also because _you're_ very motivated about _wanting to learn_."

Gren looked at the blueberries. "You're one of the most dedicated students that I've met in general, not just as a TA," his voice grew softer...fonder? That was probably the _'crush'_ -part of his brain hoping...

Corvus had to turn away, his cheeks feeling warm, and shoved the fistful of blueberries in his mouth - a mix of sweet and tart.

"And, t-to answer your question," Gren continued, with the exception of a little waver, his voice returning to normal, causing Corvus to look back at him, "This is the first time I've brought something in to celebrate midterms ending. I figured I would share them with _w-whoever_ came." He paused. "But I knew I could count on _one person_ showing up," he smiled and Corvus felt it like all of Gren's words and actions were pings to his heart.

Corvus inhaled a little deeper than usual, trying to calm his nerves by taking subtle deep breaths. He let out a small smirk and pushed the blueberries towards Gren, "You're helping me eat these, right?"

Gren nodded and took a handful. "If it's okay with you...I figured you deserved a little break before we started practicing. But if you want to practice right away that's fine, I mean, it's technically office hours, and I'm supposed to help whoever comes," he said before eating a blueberry. Eating each individual blueberry in his hand one at a time.

Typical practice meant having a signed conversation, and Gren helping Corvus when he forgot a word, didn't get the grammatical structure right, or didn't have the right expression to convey the message - which was a common error.

Truthfully, Corvus enjoyed practice at first because it helped with his ability to network in sign language. Now, there was a part of him that enjoyed it because it usually meant getting to know Gren better.

But an opportunity to just _hang out?_

"A small break before we start sounds nice," Corvus smiled.

"Sounds good," Gren said softly before eating another blueberry, his face instantly puckering up.

Corvus laughed, "Tart?"

Gren joined in after swallowing, "Very! Let's try that again..." His face scrunched back up and he seemed to reflectively shake his head.

Corvus continued to laugh. "I think you lucked out on the first few you ate," he said when his laughter calmed down. "Consider eating a handful, then you'll get the sweet _and_ the tart. It balances out."

There was a flash in Gren's eyes and his smile looked almost mischievous. Corvus started to wonder if Gren had played this chance game of blueberries before.

" _True…_ " Gren drew the word out longer than typical, "but _I_ _enjoy_ savoring each individual berry's flavor," he grinned. And there was _something_ in the tone. A dare? A tease? Wait... _flirtation_? Was _this_ Gren's version of _flirting_? Maybe that was wishful thinking...

Corvus raised an eyebrow, leaned back in the chair, and grinned, "Then don't let me stop you. _I enjoy_ watching your reactions." If this was flirting, Corvus was more than happy to flirt back.

Gren chuckled a little and turned away, a hint of pink on his cheeks, then popped another blueberry in his mouth. His face quickly turned towards Corvus, who surprisingly found himself on the edge of his chair awaiting Gren's reaction.

Then Gren gave him a wide closed mouth smile, _a wink,_ and **_a big thumbs up_**.

Corvus started laughing instantly. "So… Cheesy!" he said when he took in enough air to push the words out. Okay, so maybe this _wasn't_ flirting, but whatever it was, it was fun.

When his laughter started to settle down Corvus sat up straight, smiled, and waved his two hands to sign, "Yay." Which caused Gren to erupt in a sudden burst of laughter, cracking Corvus up again.

"Was not… Expecting…" Gren repeated the sign for 'applause', "That was… Great! … Your… expression… matched!" Gren said between laughs, giving Corvus another thumbs up, causing Corvus to feel somehow lighter.

The break seemed short, the air felt electric, and every simple action seemed to spark more laughter - so much that the office next to them came in to "kindly ask'' that they please "tune it down".

Halfway through the container Corvus found himself taking smaller and smaller handfuls, trying to make it last longer. On his very last reach for berries Gren's hand reached in, grazed his, and Corvus felt 'it' - that jolt.

Just like a trope from the shoujo manga that Sabah liked to read, all the nerves in his body focused on just the areas where their fingers touched. Corvus felt his face flush, grabbed the berries and withdrew his hand as calmly as possible, looking at Gren to see if he had a similar reaction.

But Gren seemed none-the-wiser to Corvus' reaction, and just paused. "Do you mind if I finish them?" Gren asked tentatively.

Corvus leaned back, grinned, and shook his head, "Please do, and thank you for bringing them. It was a nice treat."

"I enjoyed it too. You have a nice laugh, Corvus," Gren beamed at him.

Corvus threw his head back and quickly shoved his last handful of blueberries in his mouth. His hand lingered a little longer than necessary, but it hopefully covered the heat of his cheeks and his large sappy smile.

"You too, Gren," Corvus replied, voice even. A smile still on his face but much more tamed than before.

Somehow Gren's eyes seemed to reply back and carried a warmth. ...Until he ate another berry and his face once again crinkled from the tartness - both of them erupting into laughter.

Once they finished, the remainder of office hours continued as usual, and the next TA had to kick them out because they lost track of time - which was starting to become a pattern in the past two weeks.

They continued to practice signing as they went down the elevator before they parted ways. Corvus did most of the signing, and while he still needed to work on his vocabulary as well as expressions, Gren shared a little more personal information with him and that was _nice_.

Gren signed a little about his older sister and his older brother, who had lost his hearing when he was almost five. It helped to fill in some of the gaps.

And who knows, maybe Gren didn't talk about that with everyone? Maybe to Gren, Corvus _wasn't_ just another eager freshman. Gren bringing in blueberries was a nice gesture, and he hinted that it was mostly for Corvus. So maybe, to Gren, he was _a little_ special? Maybe a _potential_ friend?

Corvus could feel his heart pound pleasantly fast in his chest.

Okay, so forget about networking, his intention to focus _only_ on school, and the imaginary 'chain of command' he built in his head - for one thing, Gren wasn't actually in the military. Gren viewed himself as a 'student helping other students,' so having a _little_ crush was _probably_ fine.

Putting his infatuation aside, Corvus just really enjoyed hanging out with Gren, getting to know more about him, seeing his adorable expressions, his cheesy reactions - _it was wonderful_.

It would be nice to _officially_ become friends with him, and see even more sides of him. Maybe, when class was over, Corvus would have the courage to ask. He could wait until then.

Correction, he _would_ wait until then because waiting until class ended would probably make them both more comfortable.

And besides, to Corvus, Gren seemed like the type of guy that was worth waiting for.


	3. The First Step

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still, who would have guessed that plans could make him feel this excited?

**Second Week of December - End of the Fall Semester:  
**

Walking onto campus, Gren couldn't believe it was already December. The leaves had all fallen, he could see his breath as he exhaled and, even harder to believe, finals started in two days…

Gren hustled to the campus library - his meeting spot with Corvus today.

At the end of office hours last week Corvus had asked Gren if they could meet an additional time in the library for extra help, and...well...how could Gren say no?

Entering through the automatic double doors, Gren turned left and went up the elevator - directly to the room he booked for them.

Okay, so _technically_ Gren could've said 'no'; it was off hours, and if it was _any other student_ he probably would have because Gren needed to study for his own finals. But Gren _enjoyed_ helping Corvus. He wondered if there was anyone else out there that matched him in sheer perseverance and resilience. If Gren could help Corvus reach even a step further, he would do it.

Gren checked the signout sheet located just outside the small study room to confirm it was the one he had reserved before opening the door and spreading out - pulling out his laptop and his notes.

Of course, the fact that Gren _enjoyed_ Covus' company _probably_ came into play when making the decision too. The fact that Marcos, his roommate, knew Corvus' name was probably an indicator that Gren had maybe talked about him too much without fully realizing it.

Gren sighed and looked at the clock - 8:45 am, fifteen minutes late. Gren frowned, Corvus never ran late - hopefully everything was alright.

Thankfully, today was a reading day so there were no scheduled classes, and since Gren had reserved the small library study room, he figured it didn't hurt to just use it personally until his time slot ended at 10:00, regardless of whether Corvus showed up or not. ...Although _that_ thought made him a little uneasy.

He could hear the soft, hurried footsteps before he noticed that there was a person trying to peek into the room.

"Corvus!" Gren said brightly before standing up and opening the door.

"Gren!" He huffed, holding a heavy winter coat. Up close Gren noticed Corvus was a little sweaty. “I’m sorry,” he took another gasp of air, “...that I’m late.”

He took a moment in the door frame to catch his breath. "Monday PT training went a little late this morning so I rushed back to shower, only to realize that I was running super late and I needed to let you know but didn't have your number so I couldn't text. I sent you an email but I wasn't sure if you read it since you mentioned last week that you don't read your emails until the evenings on reading days. So then I ran here, in my winter jacket, completely negating my shower, I'm sure."

A wave of relief washed over Gren: Corvus was alright.

He tried to dismiss Corvus' concerns with a wave of his hand as he walked him into the room, "No, you're fine. I didn't realize you were in the ROTC program. With all of our conversations about the military, I figured there was a chance, but didn't want to assume... If I had realized you had PT, I would have picked another time."

"No, no, it's fine. Please, _you're_ doing _me_ the favor, so of course I would try to accommodate the time you picked. I'm just glad-" Corvus stopped suddenly after he sat down. He looked to the left and right of him. "...I left the study guide in my dorm," he said, deflated.

With a small chuckle, Gren opened his laptop, "No problem, I'll pull it up. Did you already turn in the recording portion?" he asked while looking back up.

Corvus moved his hand to cover his mouth. In thought-perhaps? His hazel eyes glistened from the winter wind but somehow shone with a warmth.

Gren’s chest felt...funny, tingling? Tight? ...And he felt himself compelled to study Corvus’ face closer. Surely a side effect from working with him on his expressions during office hours. It was like he was conditioned to study Corvus’ face.

 _Oh! The login. Right...sign into the computer,_ Gren reminded himself and pulled his gaze away from Corvus and to his screen, typing in his username and password.

“I uploaded it, but didn’t submit it yet,” Corvus answered.

 _What?_ Gren looked up at Corvus who was sitting across from him - like the answer was on his face. _Oh…right, the recording._

Corvus got up and walked over, "I was going to ask if you could review it first." He hovered just behind Gren, leaning over his shoulder, "Would you mind if I logged into the site?"

Gren straightened up, suddenly aware of how close their bodies were. Corvus' deodorant in his CO2 zone.

 _It smells nice._ He flushed slightly at the thought.

"Gren?"

"Pardon?"

Corvus chuckled, "I asked: do you mind checking it out, or is that like cheating?"

Gren shook his head, snapping himself out of it. "No, no. I'm not in charge of your final grade so it's definitely not cheating. Let's just look at your video and make sure it matches all the criteria in the rubric."

Corvus leaned in, pulled up the rubric from Dr. Fen's site and split-screened the laptop between the rubric and his video. Then he grabbed the chair next to Gren and leaned in again to look at the screen.

Gren could feel his face redden further; he wasn't used to people being in his space, but it was because they both needed to see the laptop. He understood that.

After viewing the video (which looked great) Gren pulled up the study guide to go over other parts of KSL, including grammatical structure and KSL culture. The remainder of the time was spent practicing vocabulary, and being conversational with the appropriate expressions to match the tone. (At which Corvus had improved tremendously due to his hard work.)

"I think this exam will be a breeze for you," Gren said at the end with a grin.

"Thanks. You were a great teacher. I think I learned more from our office hours than I learned from Dr. Fen," Corvus grinned back.

Gren blushed, "Well, we practically had one-on-one tutoring most of the time, so I'm sure that helped."

He looked at the clock: 9:50, they needed to clear the room. Reluctantly, Gren started packing up his stuff.

"It's, _umm,_ too bad I can't be the teaching assistant next semester for KSL 102," Gren continued, although he wasn't completely sure why he was telling Corvus. Probably because he was the most dedicated student he had met, and Gren didn't want Corvus to expect to see him next semester only to be surprised when another TA showed up instead.

"What?" Corvus' voice dropped.

Gren froze momentarily; Corvus sounded disappointed and that caught him off guard.

"Yeah, I'm in the accelerated masters program so I have a heavy course load next semester. I appreciate the financial help being a TA brings, and I love helping my fellow students, like you, but I can't handle 21 credits and TA-ing a class." Gren finished packing his bag, took in a breath, and looked up. "So, _umm_ , the final is probably my last time seeing you," he said, his volume lower than when he first started.

Corvus nodded with a sigh, "Yeah, that makes sense. Sucks though."

 _It really does suck,_ Gren agreed in his head. But it was better to try to find the silver lining, right? 

"On the bright side, Dr. Fen received a lot of positive feedback about recording his classes so that will continue, and I'm sure his next TA will be awesome too." He gave Corvus a large smile and two big thumbs up, this usually made Corvus crack a smile during office hours...

Corvus gave a small chuckle, " _Heh_ ," before looking away. "That's not why it sucks," he said quietly.

Gren looked down again, he was going to miss Corvus too. But who knows! Maybe they'd run into each other on campus. That was a comforting thought!

Gren put on his winter coat, picked up his backpack and hoisted it over his shoulders.

When he looked back up he saw Corvus hold out his right hand then move it to his ear, thumb and pinky making a phone, then he pinched his fingers together on both hands, touched the tips twice with a little twist, and lastly both arms moved outward with his palms opened up and shook his hands back and forth - his expression conveying that it was a question.

In KSL, "Wait, what's your phone number?"

Gren felt his heart skip a beat. Using KSL to ask the question, it was hard to interpret the gesture as anything other than sweet and heartwarming.

Oh, but then the actual question...What was appropriate?

"I shouldn't until your class is over," Gren mumbled apologetically.

Corvus nodded, "I understand."

"B-but when class is over, after the final this Wednesday, I could give it to you then...If that's still alright?"

Gren wiped his palms against the side of his pants. Why they were sweaty was a mystery.  
And his voice...it _wavered?_ ...Because his mouth felt dry, of course.  
Waiting for Corvus’ answer...was Gren holding his breath?

... _Why?_

Corvus paused as he put on his winter jacket, then looked up and smiled, "Yeah! Yeah, that would be nice."

Gren felt like time started moving again as he let out his breath and smiled back at Corvus.

"I could wait for you after class, and if you're up for it, treat you to lunch? As thanks for meeting with me today," Corvus continued.

Gren started walking out of the study room with Corvus.

"You don't have to treat me, but lunch would be a nice break in my schedule," Gren smiled softly.

Corvus brought a hand up, covered his mouth for a moment and nodded. Thinking, maybe? Hard to tell with his hand covering his mouth.

"Then it's a plan," he said, removing his hand, a small grin on his face.

Gren took in a breath and nodded, "Yup, sounds like a plan."

Right, and that's all there was to it. Just a plan between two students after Corvus' final and before one of Gren's.

Maybe it was even the first step to becoming less like a ‘student helping another student’ and more like _two friends enjoying each other’s company._

Gren could feel his heart beat faster as he said goodbye to Corvus and started walking towards his apartment.

Still, who would have guessed that plans could make him feel this excited? He'd have to put all this excess energy towards studying.

* * *

Corvus held himself together all the way back to his one room freshman dorm, but as soon as he safely shut the door behind him he did a little victory dance. Eyes shut and just fully enjoying the thought that Gren was going to give him his phone number after the class was done.

As he opened his eyes he could see a pair of sunfire elves staring at him: Kazi and Sabah to be exact.

"Based on your response, I take it you got his number?" Kazi asked from their desk, pushing up their glasses, trying to conceal a smile.

"Whose number?" Sabah asked, hanging over the bed that was above Kazi's desk.

"Gren's, Corvus' cute KSL TA," Kazi replied, looking up at Sabah with a grin.

Sabah put down the manga volume she was reading, giving her full attention to Kazi. " _Oh,_ is that why he wouldn't ask you to tutor him? I thought it was odd that he didn't ask you for help. I mean, you _are_ a Language Studies major. Don't you sign KSL too?"

"Hey, _hey_ , _hey_." Corvus waved his arms back and forth trying to get the story straight. "Kazi has _their own_ classes to study for, the TA _is paid_ to help the class. Plus, Sabah, you weren't there the first day, Gren was so earnest in wanting to help people and Kazi can tell you I needed the help."

Kazi brought the back of their hand to their mouth - no doubt trying to stifle a laugh, "It's true. You did need the help. I tease him, Sabah, but I think Corvus' intentions were pure in the beginning."

"Completely! I was focused on _academics_ and _networking_ \- nothing else." Whoa, it had been a while since he told himself that excuse.

Sabah smirked and half-rolled her eyes. " _Right,_ so it started 'pure' and _only now_ turned into a victory dance?" Sabah teased, waving her hand to gesture up and down at Corvus.

"Well, I _tried_ flirting as I started becoming aware that I was attracted to him, but it was hard to tell if he was receptive to the flirting or just a nice guy in general..." Corvus drifted off.

Sabah looked at Kazi before returning to Corvus, "And the verdict?"

Corvus shrugged and gave a small smile. "I still don't really know, but he agreed to give me his number and have lunch together after my KSL final."

Kazi smiled, "Well, that's not a rejection."

"Kazi!" Sabah laughed and gave Kazi a playful stern look.

Corvus laughed too, adrenaline still pumping throughout his body and needing another outlet to get his jitters out.

"He really is a nice guy so far. I hope I get to know him even better next semester..." Corvus drifted off, thinking about the times Gren slipped in little bits of personal information into their conversations.

Corvus shook his head - refocusing, and paced back and forth, "Okay, priorities: need to study, finals start on Wednesday."

He stopped suddenly, his brain catching up, and looked up to Sabah, "Wait, was that manga, Sabah?"

The sunfire elf smiled. " _Literature appreciation_ , Corvus," she said with a wink. "Besides, I'm on a study break. Right, Kazi?"

"Please don't have me justify your study habits," Kazi said flatly while looking at the computer, instantly deflating Sabah's excuse. "But before we go back to studying, requests for next year's dorms and apartments are up."

"Already?" Sabah asked.

"I guess that makes sense, it's probably like a jigsaw puzzle to place everyone," Corvus said.

"We're rooming together next year, right?" Sabah asked with enthusiasm, "I hang out here all the time anyways."

"I'm good with that. Kazi?"

Kazi nodded. The three of them first met in freshman orientation and just _clicked_. Kazi and Corvus requested each other as roommates and, luckily, the school honored it. Sabah was placed with another elf from her highschool - they were civil to each other as roommates, but not _friends_.

"The three of us, each with our own bedroom. Let's go big! Let's request the apartment housing," Kazi said enthusiastically.

"I thought that was only for juniors and above?" Sabah asked.

"Rumor has it that if all the freshmen requesting to room together have an exceptional GPA by the end of their first year, they might be admitted into the nicer apartment housing in their sophomore year - _if_ there's left over availability," Kazi said in a serious tone.

"Let's go for it! Go big or go home!" Corvus said excitedly.

"Count me in," Sabah added.

With a click of the mouse, Kazi sat triumphant, "Request submitted." They pushed up their glasses, "Now all we need are exceptional grades. I'm going to go back to studying."

"Same!" Corvus agreed and sat at his desk, finding the bag he left behind to be right next to it.

Sabah groaned, "Fine, back to studying."


	4. The Birthday Text Dilemma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I guess it's not 'stupid', but I think my head is doing that thing where it's making something into a bigger deal than it really is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** Corvus' sisters and ex are all OCs that I also use in my other TDP fic. ****  
>  ** **17-Jan:** This is the ******_Revised - Chapter_ _4 -_ Currently _edited_ , but _un-betaed_.

**January 17 - Gren's Birthday**

A dilemma had presented itself to Corvus when he first looked at his phone that morning:

> **Suggestion:**  
>  **Call Gren**  
>  **Birthday found in Contacts**

In the back of his head Corvus _vaguely_ _remembered_ that Gren's birthday fell towards the end of winter break. He remembered Gren mentioning it during lunch, and Corvus even remembered to note the date in his contact information afterwards. But the suggestion being the _first thing_ he saw when he woke up at 5:45 in the morning - he wasn't prepared for it.

It would have been wise to swipe the suggestion to the side and press 'clear', at least that would have been a decision. Instead, he ignored it and each time he looked at his phone he was reminded of his quandary - effectively causing a 'resource error' in his brain.

Corvus cycled in his head the many meanings contacting Gren on his birthday could potentially convey. And all paths boiled down to a larger question - were they really considered _official_ friends?

They had lunch together after the KSL final, and _sure_ Corvus texted well wishes for the winter solstice, and _yeah_ Gren wished him a happy new year just a few minutes after midnight, but those were _public_ holidays.

...Not like a _birthday_ which felt oddly _private_ and showed a higher degree of familiarity…

So should he text Gren...or not?

Instead of coming to a resolution, Corvus got out of bed, got dressed for his morning run, saw the temperature was (disappointingly, but unsurprisingly) too low to go for his jog, and spent the next twenty minutes in the kitchen getting the ingredients and dishes ready to make pancakes for his family while still in his running pants and hoodie.

"This is unexpected…" Corvus heard Chlo's voice before he could see her. Her rows of braids were gathered to the side into a loose ponytail, Corvus was still getting used to the color being red. ("Like General Janai," Chlo explained when he first saw it when arriving home. "I just watched a documentary on her. That woman is an inspiration!")

"So…" she said flatly, "What type of cooking is this? _'Last day I'm home before going back to school'_ -cooking? _Stress_ -cooking? _'I just saw what my ex posted on social media'_ -cooking? I feel like it's necessary for me to know so I know how much to bug you," Chlo continued, her arms wavering like she was approaching a wild animal, made all the more comical by her big fluffy light blue robe and brand new bunny slippers with hard soles - because _that_ was the part she noticed when she opened it during their gift exchange.

"Chlo…" Corvus warned, feeling a little prickly, and not really sure how much of her humor he could tolerate.

" _Oooh_ , definitely a-" she cut herself off, sitting down at the kitchen table, "Right… _That_ type of 'cooking Corvus'."

With a groan, Corvus returned his attention back to the counter before muttering, "Do you want some pancakes or not?"

From the corner of his eyes he could see her nod. "Yes, thank you, but I want to point out - _you do_ realize that it's 6:10 in the morning. Come _on_ , even mom sleeps in on vacation."

Corvus focused on mixing the batter, stirring it made him feel _a little_ better about his inability to make a decision, "Blueberry or buttermilk?"

"Buttermilk," she replied and there was a notable silence before he heard her sigh.

Corvus frowned, he was frustrated with himself, but he shouldn't take it out on Chlo… "Why are _you_ up?" he asked softly - the closest thing to an olive branch that he could muster given his current mood.

He could hear her shift at the table, followed by her footsteps, until she was next to him - putting a slice of butter on the skillet to grease it, "My room is right next to the kitchen. I could hear someone fumbling around. ...It's not like you to make a racket when everyone else is asleep, and _never intentional_." She gave him a pointed look, the message clear: she was worried.

Corvus felt his annoyance deflate. "It's stupid," he said while pouring the batter for the first round.

" _It's_ stupid, _he's_ stupid, or _you're_ stupid? And you know how I feel about all three of those statements."

Corvus chuckled. "' _It_ is too vague,' 'You're right - he _is_ stupid,' and 'Your actions might've been stupid but you and your feelings are not'." Corvus flipped the pancakes and glanced at his sister a small grin on his face, "Did I get them all?"

She nodded and leaned against the counter. "You have learned well, little brother," she said in complete mock-seriousness before she erupted back into a smile. "So, you already know my answer, which one is it?"

"I guess it's not 'stupid', but I think my head is doing that thing where it's making something into a bigger deal than it really is."

Chlo continued to nod. "That checks out. What are you thinking about?" her voice was calm and leveled now - all joking removed.

"So... _err…_ " he started removing the pancakes from the skillet onto a plate - something _necessary_ and something that bought him time. He really should have guessed that Chlo would take the plate, fork, and eat them standing up next to him rather than the table - patiently waiting for him to continue.

"There's this guy at school," he finally said, pouring the next set of batter on the skillet.

" _Um-hmm…_ " she nodded. Silence. "...And are you _in love_ with this guy?" she asked when Corvus didn't continue on his own.

"I'm _in like_ ," Corvus said, flipping the pancakes over.

" _'Kay_ …" From his peripheral vision he could see her wave the fork in small circles, _go on_.

"It's his birthday today, and, I don't know… I'm not really sure if I should text him 'Happy Birthday', y'know? Like, is that okay? I don't really know if we're at like a 'Happy Birthday'-level in our, I guess, friendship?"

Chlo took in a deep breath, nodded to herself and looked at the ceiling. At one point she commented, "Processing."

Taking in another deep breath she took her plate to the table, as if by smell knowing that Corvus finished cooking his pancakes and would be joining her. After turning everything off, plating his stack and grabbing some jam, he sat down next to her.

"So let me get this straight." She raised a finger up and pointed to it - counting, "There's a guy at school that you _seem_ to have a crush on. Correct...?"

Corvus nodded, lathering some jam on his pancakes.

She raised a second finger, continuing to point to it as if they were tangible bullet points, "You are not sure how close he considers your relationship to be."

Corvus nodded, taking a bite of his pancakes and Chlo continued finger counting. "You're nervous that texting him 'Happy Birthday' will be overstepping some sort of boundary?" she said, her voice was sincere but also confused.

He sighed, "When you repeat it back, it sounds stupid that I'm even worried about this."

Chlo shook her head vigorously, "No, no! It's _not_ stupid. I just… Y'know, most of the time you act like you have it together, so sometimes when you have a problem, and it's a typical problem of a 'nineteen year old boy with a crush', I just need to process that."

Corvus gave her a doubtful look.

"Like, opening the curtains on the Great and Powerful Oz," she continued with a playful smirk.

Corvus paused his next bite and raised an eyebrow, "The Great and Powerful Oz?"

"I'm giving you a compliment; accept it and don't let it get to your head," Chlo half-chuckled, nudging him.

Corvus finished his bite of pancakes and gave a shrug-nod, mentally filing that 'compliment' for later as something to potentially tease her about.

Chlo gave a half-sigh, "You also classify things differently from me...After you broke up with Leo you had a few...What did you call them?"

"Attractions."

"Right, attractions, whereas I probably would have counted those as a crush…"

"But they were _just_ _cute_. I didn't want to, y'know, potentially _date_ any of them hence - _attractions_."

Chlo smiled, her brown eyes warm, "Right. So when I consider that...This is your first _crush_ since Leo. When was that? Sophomore year of highschool?"

Corvus could feel his cheeks heat up and took another large bite of pancakes. "Yes," he replied after chewing - giving him a little more time to gather some composure.

Chlo looked off into the distance, tapping her chin, before she started thinking aloud, "So this guy was elevated from _attraction_ -status to _crush_ -status…" She turned to face Corvus, her voice more sure of itself, "Which means you must've made some sort of _connection,_ right?"

"I guess? But he's nice to _everyone_ , I'm not really sure if-"

" _Ah!_ Problem solved then," Chlo cut him off with a grin.

Corvus furrowed his eyebrows and shook his head, _problem solved how?_

"If he's nice to everyone, then he's probably not the type of guy to overthink a 'Happy Birthday' text message."

Okay, so she had a point there.

Her body slumped into the chair a little and she returned to her now-cold pancakes, " _Gosh_ , if he was like you then we would _really_ be sitting here dissecting possible routes."

" _Slight_ offence there, Chlo."

Her face grimaced, "I'm sorry, Corvus. I didn't mean it in a bad way. You're a future intel analyzer. Thinking of multiple paths...looking into details…It's in your nature and it's a great thing, but yeah… the downside is that you can get stuck on somethings and overthink it sometimes…"

Fair point, one he was _all too_ self-aware of, and working on.

She scratched the back of her neck. "Anyways, back on topic, if you don't think he's the type to read too much into actions, and delve into their possible meanings, then I think you're fine to send him a text," she restated.

That _really did_ make sense…

Afterall, Gren was friendly, sweet, and surprisingly attentive - like with the blueberries, but also _not one to assume_ possible connections - like their conversations about military operations and Corvus being in ROTC.

Actually, considering how friendly Gren was, it was even likely that he would be _happy_ to receive a Happy Birthday text. Corvus could make it a little fancy too, send the message with an effect. Before break, Gren was rotating between being awe-inspired and in stitches with Corvus showing him gifs - a message sent with an effect might _really_ blow his mind.

Corvus stood up, picking up both of their plates. "Thanks, Chlo," he said with a warm smile on his face.

"Also, for the record, I'm letting you off the hook for now, but after your jog, ****_I will_ be asking for more details," Chlo warned as Corvus walked over towards the sink.

"More details about what?" Corvus heard his youngest sister yawn the question before turning around and seeing her walk towards the kitchen table.

"Returning back to school tomorrow," Corvus fibbed, hoping Asha didn't 'overhear' the whole conversation.

" _Hmm…_ " his eleven year old sister hummed - not convinced.

"Why are you up?" Chlo asked softly.

"My nose smelled something good," she smiled before turning to Corvus, "And my sibling-sense was tingling."

Corvus walked over and placed her in a mock-headlock, "More like your _snooping_ -sense."

Asha giggled, holding onto his arm and hugging him closer.

"She's not denying it," Corvus continued to tease, giving her a small hug from the back before letting her out of the headlock. "I think she's secretly going to miss me when I go back."

"No doubt," Chlo grinned. "You should have heard her all fall semester. Asking mom and dad each time you left when you were scheduled for a visit."

"Hey! Nothing wrong with missing your brother. I'll miss you too when you transfer to your main university, Chlo…" Asha turned to Corvus, "Besides, Corvus makes _the best_ pancakes."

Corvus grinned, "Hint taken, and coming right up."


	5. Birthday Breakfast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> By the time Gren looked up, Janai had a warm smile on her face and Amaya a slight pout.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **17-Jan:** This is the **_Revised - Chapter_ _5 -_** Currently _edited_ but _un-betaed_.

**January 17 - Gren's Birthday**

The birthday candle on the small stack of pancakes, surrounded by whip cream and brightly colored sprinkles, was a sweet gesture albeit embarrassing. Yet, Gren smiled good-naturely as Amaya and Janai signed 'Happy Birthday' to him.

On the bright side, at least it was a meal from a restaurant and not something Amaya herself made. For as much as he loved Amaya, and will admit she could cook _many other dishes_ well, baking anything that involved flour was not her specialty.

"Make a wish!" Amaya signed, excitement evident by her expression - her eyes glimmering in almost child-like wonder.

Amaya loved a good party - no matter the excuse, but she also seemed to love all those small traditions that didn't really make sense when you thought about it too much. How was blowing out a candle _really_ going to make a wish come true? Why did your wish _have to_ be a secret?

But it made Amaya happy, and although Gren was always the type of person who tried to make his own wishes come true, there was a small part of Gren that figured if someone as wise as General Amaya believed in the magic of birthday wishes that maybe there might be something there. It didn't hurt to hope, he supposed.

Gren thought about it, raising a hand to his chin, _What to wish for…_

Amaya leaned forward further and Janai laughed. This, being the third celebration of Gren's birthday as a trio, was the pair's usual song and dance. Undoubtedly, the Sun Fire General was used to both her wife's excitement regarding birthday traditions as well as Gren's long drawn out process for making a wish, and was probably enjoying the show.

Although...He really should have been better prepared, this happened every year. But to demand to want something can be hard...

 _'Understanding and acceptance between elves and humans'_ would be a nice wish for _the_ _world_...  
...but he felt like that was setting birthday wishes up for failure.

Every year brings challenges. Maybe _'the wisdom to help with challenges'_?  
...Not quite... How can a birthday wish suddenly give him an abstract thing like _wisdom?_

Amaya gestured to ' _go on_ ' her eyes widening.

"I'm thinking," Gren signed with a smile.

"You're _over_ thinking," Amaya grinned with a twinkle in her eyes, "What do you want? It can be anything, big or small."

Gren nodded and brought his hand back to his chin. He wasn't _in_ _want_ of anything… but smaller seemed do-able… What would be nice?

_A low-key relaxing evening with the people that I love._  
_...Perfect!_

Gren smiled and nodded to Amaya, before blowing out the candle.

Both Amaya and Janai signed applause, before Amaya went to the question she always asked after blowing out the candle. If anything, it was practically part of the routine.

"What did you wish for?"

Gren laughed. "You know I can't tell you," he signed. He made the mistake of actually telling her the first year he met her, when he was in high school, and she had playfully scolded him about it.

Amaya leaned back and grinned, satisfied with Gren's answer, " _You_ know I have to ask. Every good thing in life gets tested at some point - even wishes."

Gren nodded, used to hearing this lesson each year.

"So, _what did_ you wish for, Gren?" Janai asked verbally.

" _Oh!_ Umm…" Gren was about to open his mouth again but realized, "General Janai, not you too..."

Janai laughed and Amaya grinned cheekily, "Tested in _multiple_ ways."

Gren shook his head. "Tricky, tricky," he signed with a small smile.

A loud sound from Gren's pocket went off and Gren practically jumped from being startled. It probably wasn't _actually_ loud, but it _felt_ loud, partially because the restaurant _felt_ quiet - most of the patrons were from the deaf or hard of hearing community.

"Sorry!" Gren signed, cheeks hot as he pulled out his phone to turn it off.

"It's _your_ birthday, Gren. It's not rude if you want to check it," Janai said softly, her voice had a smooth quality that had a remarkable ability to calm his nerves if he became suddenly frazzled.

Without even reading her wife's lips, Amaya nodded, and Gren smiled at how in-synced they seemed to always be.

Gren met Amaya about a year after they got married, but he remembered watching parts of their engagement and wedding on the news. The pair had met in college when the future Katolis General studied abroad for a year in the Sun Fire Kingdom. After returning home, they maintained a long distance relationship for two years - not an easy feat in itself.

As their relationship continued, there were other hoops for them to jump through too - dual citizenship, security concerns given both of their positions. It was a big deal politically, but despite all of the obstacles, including some political pressure against their relationship from certain factions in both countries, teenage-Gren was always in awe of them both.

He particularly noted how in each interview there was always an undercurrent between them - both an admiration and a softness in the way they looked at each other, even when the other wasn't looking.

 _"It's the look of love_ ," his sister, Embla, had called it one night when watching T.V. with him on a rare visit home. " _You may or may not experience romantic love, Gren, but if you do, I hope you look at each other that way,"_ Embla said with warmth in her voice. Being eight years older, she always had a wise-beyond-her-years vibe to Gren, and he could think of no better way to describe the unspoken bond that passed between Amaya and Janai.

It never failed to amaze Gren that even in the four years of knowing Amaya, and slightly less of knowing General Janai, that connection was still as strong as ever.

"Is it Marcos?" Amaya asked, and without looking at his phone, Gren shook his head - it shouldn't be his roommate, unless it was an emergency…

Gren looked down, a wide smile spread across his face, _Corvus!_

He remembered his birthday. That was so nice!

"My friend, Corvus," Gren explained, finger spelling Corvus' name. He opened the message and his eyes grew wide - how did Corvus get balloons to float around the screen when he opened his message?

"Somehow balloons came up!" Gren got out of his seat and showed his phone to Amaya and Janai. Noticing the small ' Replay' option, he pressed it and the effect happened again, much to Gren's delight.

Upon seeing Gren's expression, Amaya laughed a little. She got his attention, "It's not too hard you-"

Janai placed a finger on Amaya's lips, a signal enough to stop signing, and Amaya looked back at her wife in mild surprise before turning into a mischievous grin and kissing her finger in attack.

Janai wasn't deterred from her original goal. She smiled, nudged her head to Gren, then to the phone, and raised her eyebrows.  
...Was that supposed to mean something?

Gren knew enough to step away slowly, let them silently communicate, and return to his seat - pressing 'replay' one last time to see the colorful array of green, blue, yellow and red balloons fill his screen - still a small thrill.

By the time Gren finished putting his phone on "Do not disturb" and tucked it back into his pocket, Janai had a warm smile on her face and Amaya a slight pout.

Janai laughed a little and signed, "Don't mind her, I think she likes being your number one mentor."

"Hey!" Amaya signed immediately, sticking out her tongue.

Gren tilted his head to the side. "Of course she is - nothing can change that. I don't even understand how it came up," Gren signed, a little embarrassed.

Janai nudged Amaya with her elbow and a large smile. "See, told you."

Amaya rolled her eyes with a grin, "Yeah, yeah…"

"What a sweet message from your friend. I forget that a smartphone is still new to you, Gren. Maybe your friend can teach you how to do effects," Janai continued.

"Maybe!" Gren beamed, "Although, even if I learned, I'm not sure I would really use them. But Corvus is amazing with technology! Well… at least from the pieces I've picked up on."

"Corvus?" Amaya asked, then pointed again to the location that Gren used for his initialization - above his heart. "Is he dear to you?"

To be perfectly honest, Gren wasn't consciously aware he did that. He usually initialized people at that location if they were in his inner circle - Marcos, his roommate, took over a year. It was curious as to why he would instinctively initialize Corvus there, but Gren figured he subconsciously recognized Corvus to be the type of person that _could_ be in his inner circle, or maybe it had more to do with how Corvus had more than earned his whole hearted admiration and respect.

"I admire his perseverance and work ethic whole heartedly," Gren signed, feeling a little embarrassed to admit it to someone other than himself. "We technically saw each other four days a week for the KSL class I TAed for. Although, we really only had time to talk after class and during office hours..."

Amaya's eyes went wide - piecing it together, "Oh! _He's_ the student who would come to each of your office hours?"

Gren nodded, glad that Amaya remembered from the few times he mentioned it in his texts.

"Each session?" Janai asked.

Gren nodded again, his previous embarrassment now turning into a feeling of pride for his friend, "He's an extremely motivated learner! He hopes to one day work with you, Amaya, and wants to be able to communicate with you directly."

Amaya looked a little taken aback then smiled, "I'm glad he's thinking ahead."

There was a fluttering in Gren's chest, that feeling of pride on Corvus' behalf probably. "Yes, he is one of the most dedicated students I've ever met," Gren signed, his face feeling warm from the memory.

Amaya grinned and looked at Janai sitting next to her. "You were a _dedicated_ student too, if I remember correctly," she signed with a smirk.

Janai leaned back in her chair and grinned. "Naturally, I had a strong incentive," she signed before Amaya grabbed Janai's hand and kissed the back of it with a wink.

"Thinking back to college brings back a lot of fond memories," Amaya continued and glanced at Janai.

Janai, now blushing and making equally small glances towards Amaya, had a warm smile on her face indicating she really didn't mind all that much.

Gren smiled understandingly, then he remembered the pancake in front of him and cut a small bite to eat - the whip cream had melted by this point and it was no longer hot, but surprisingly still warm.

Amaya's eyes grew wide, "We've gotten sidetracked. Is it still good?"

"Delicious!" Gren beamed.

Amaya nodded, her expression looking a little relieved - Gren was _very_ aware of the importance she placed on breakfast.

Gren placed down his fork. "Going back to Corvus for a moment…" Gren hesitated but both Amaya and Janai signaled to continue. "Would you mind meeting him? Maybe after the second semester gets started?"

"Considering how highly you spoke of him, how can I not?" Amaya signed with a grin. "Let's meet informally, like this, for breakfast."

Gren brightened, "That would be great! He's going to be thrilled."

There was a part of Gren that recognized Janai chuckling to herself, from his peripheral vision he could see her signing - undoubtedly teasing her wife, but Gren figured it was better to let them have a moment, and for him to finish his official birthday pancake before it turned completely cold.

* * *

"Ur the best! "

Gren read the text message from Corvus later that evening.

"IOU big." Another message quickly followed.

Gren laid on his couch and started typing back, "You don't owe me anything. I just mentioned your name, it was Amaya that thought to invite you to breakfast."

"Amaya"  
"Wow"  
"Ur on 1st name basis - impressive" Corvus typed.

"I hope that's me someday" He added a few moments later.

And before Gren could finish typing, _I'm sure it will be,_ Corvus had already sent another text.

"But u mentioned me"  
"Which --> "  
"So let me treat u to a meal "

"Are you even back on campus yet?" Gren half-laughed as he typed. Corvus was much faster at this than him.

"..."  
"...No"  
"But when I'm back let me treat u."

"No, it's fine. How about we meet up for lunch the second week of school? That way things calm down and we get a feel for classes."

"21 credits right?"  
"Will u have time?"

"Of course! I always make time for friends. Besides I think it'll be a needed break by then. I swear I did so well on my Deaf Literature final because I met up with you before it and that helped me relax. :)"

He could see Corvus type, then stop, then type again. "Ok. 2nd wk. I'll txt u."

"Same vendor as before? Or a different one in the student center?" Gren asked.

"Same. " Corvus replied. "Txt dets l8r. SWOMS"

Gren tilted his head, SWOMS? He checked the web - nothing that made sense to the conversation.

Gren got up from the couch and went over to his roommate who was cooking dinner for the evening. "Hey, Marcos, what does SWOMS mean in text speak?"

Marcos paused his work breading the chicken, hands lingering over the bowl. Gren held the phone out and tried to angle it so Marcos could better read it.

"Oh, that takes me back," he said as an aside. "That looks like PWOMS - Parents watching over my shoulder. So with the 's' maybe sister? Sibling?"

"Oh, maybe? I know he has two sisters, but I'll ask him when we meet for lunch..." Gren thought aloud.

Marcos studied Gren's face for a moment, "Hmm." He nodded, then went back to breading.

"Thanks."

"Yup." He looked at Gren with an inquisitive eyebrow raised, "Hope lunch goes well, when it happens."

"I don't see why it wouldn't. It's just a casual lunch," he smiled.

And Marcos nodded again, resuming his work on dinner prep. "Got it."


	6. Inquiring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When they were talking about dating...that made him nervous, but _not in a bad way._ What did that even mean?

**Second week of March - Middle of the Spring Semester**

Gren opened the door to their now usual study room on the third floor of the student center, two bags from the deli shop gripped in hand. The library didn’t allow food in the building, but the rules in the student center were more relaxed and ever since he met up with Corvus in the beginning of the semester, Gren found himself reserving a room with him multiple times a week. It was set up for two hour slots, so Gren would reserve it for lunch and Corvus for dinner time/before Gren’s evening class.

“Got your sandwich,” Gren said while entering the room. “And some desserts for surviving midterms.” He displayed the blueberry shortcake for Corvus and the strawberry shortcake for himself.

Corvus’ smile was wider than usual, and that made Gren blush with pride at the thought that he made Corvus’ day a little better by bringing desserts.

“Barius’ Bakery & Deli is the best! Thanks! And thanks for the dessert!” Corvus continued to grin as he put his textbook aside and grabbed the bag Gren pushed across the table towards him.

“So, is your grade from your group project posted yet?” Corvus asked while pulling out his Reuben sandwich.

Gren shook his head while pulling out a Duren Fresh sandwich on a crunch roll, “Maybe by the end of the week. How about you? When do they expect your midterms to be graded?”

“End of the week for scantron exams and the end of next week for bluebook and projects.”

Gren nodded, taking a bite of his sandwich. It was only lunch time, but his adrenaline from buying Corvus lunch was now starting to wane and he felt ready for a nap.

“Gren, if you don’t mind me asking, _why are_ you taking 21 credits this semester?”

Gren shook his head, both as _I don’t mind_ and to refocus, “This was scheduled to be a 15 credit semester, but then I would have to attend all three sessions of summer school. Instead of attending session B, which overlaps with the end of A and beginning of C, I’m taking those two classes now so I can make work a higher priority during the summer.”

Corvus chuckled, “Of course, that sounds like you.”

Gren perked up; sounds like him?

Corvus must’ve read Gren’s expression because he grinned and continued, “You always came across as a hard worker, Gren, from the way you introduced yourself to every student in KSL 101, the effort it took to record and edit those videos, to how you wrote a note of encouragement to _each student_ in that class after the midterm _and_ final - I still think you put more effort into that class than Dr. Fen. I can’t even imagine what you do that I don’t see. You taking 21 credits so you can better focus on your summer job just matches. So, y’know, it sounds like _you_.”

Gren could feel his cheeks heat up. Corvus must’ve noticed it too because he seemed to be getting a kick out of it, straightening his back and returning to his sandwich to contain his grin.

“It’s easy to miss because of your cute freckles and relaxed demeanor, but you’re actually super driven,” Corvus said casually, still focused on his sandwich. His eyes flashed up to meet Gren, smirk on his face, “It’s actually one of the reasons why I like you.”

His heart felt like it was KOed. It was beating so quickly Gren could practically hear it in his ears. He felt his chest tighten and thought he would be short of breath. Even worse, now his entire face felt hot - he must have turned bright red.

Corvus smiled and looked satisfied with Gren’s reaction to his comments before returning to his sandwich.

“Th-” He cleared his throat. “Thank you. That was probably one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. ...Thanks.” Gren smiled and then retreated behind his sandwich in hopes it would at least partly cover his blush.

They sat and ate their lunch for a beat longer, Gren still trying to process what Corvus said. “Umm... I feel the same towards you too,” he said, his volume lower than typical.

Corvus had finished his sandwich by this point and was opening the container with the blueberry shortcake. “Oh?” He glanced up but didn’t linger long.

“I think you’re amazing too. Y-your resiliency and dedication you show to your studies and future career is inspiring!”

Corvus stayed focused on his shortcake.

“It’s one of the reasons I like hanging out with you too,” Gren said even softer.

Corvus looked up, hazel eyes surprisingly vulnerable.

“Being around you motivates me to work harder,” Gren finished, voice still low. And it was nice to see the effects of his words on Corvus. He looked touched and...flustered?

There were undertones of red in Corvus' cheeks. His hazel eyes darted between him and the shortcake, and the mood in those reflected in those orbs alternated from expressive to analytical - like he was calculating something in his head. A smile spread across Gren's face.

_Corvus looked cute._

_...Wait._ Gren blinked rapidly, his thoughts catching up. _... What?_ His face flushed hot and Gren immediately looked down - kept his eyes focused on his dessert.

Okay... _This was okay,_ not really a _new_ thought; he had always found Corvus to be endearing. This was just a different _type_ of endearment.  
...Maybe? But if it was a different 'type', what 'type' was it?

“Hey, Gren?”

Gren still didn’t dare look up, _“Hmm?”_ he responded, taking a forkful of strawberry shortcake.

“What exactly do you do for fun? We always talk about our classes and whatever is going on around campus, but what do you do when you’re not studying or working?”

Gren thought about it, looking past his dessert, the change in subject _a very welcomed distraction_ from his previous thoughts, “I guess, besides studying with you and classes...I guess, Marcos and I watch Netflix.”

“Marcos?”

“My roommate. We were in classes together during high school but grew closer since we chose the same college and have been roommates since freshman year.” Gren tried to do the math in his head. He and Marcos had technically known each other since Marcos moved to his area in eighth grade. Eight years ago? Hard to believe it’d been that long.

“Are you guys dating?” 

Gren looked up. _Why does Corvus look nervous,_ he wondered to himself.

“No, I’ve never actually dated anyone.”

Corvus looked surprised, “Oh?”

Gren looked down and thought about it for a moment, “I guess, I’ve never really been interested in dating, but...I’m not _against_ it either.” He returned back to Corvus, “I just I never stopped to think about it. My older brother would try to egg me on about it, my mom too. I can't tell you how many times I've heard that I _'just haven't met the right person yet'_." Gren let out a small breath of air and continued, his voice quieter, "I had always hated hearing that. It wasn't something I felt like I chose... I just _wasn’t interested_.”

“And now?” Corvus raised an eyebrow.

Gren thought about it further. Would he go on a date in college? _Meh,_ but then again... there were probably different types of dates too, right?

“I guess it depends on who it’s with.” Gren answered casually, taking one of the last remaining bites of his dessert.  
Why would Corvus even ask this? “Wait! Corvus, are you trying to set me up with someone? I’m flattered but-”

“No, _no_.” Corvus let out a strained laugh while waving his arms. “ _Definitely not._ Just wondering, that’s all.”

“Oh, okay.” Gren looked back to the remaining two bites of his treat. _It’s a question that can come up as friends get to know each other better,_ Gren reminded himself.

 _Completely normal,_ no reason to get nervous. _Heh,_ why was he nervous anyways? Not like _Corvus_ would ask him out. Well, that might be nice...Wait, that might be nice? But Corvus wouldn’t! And Gren couldn't! After all, they were study buddies! Plus, Corvus' personality was as wonderful as his work ethic, so certainly Corvus had lots of other options...

 _Probably more available than a workaholic._ Gren’s thoughts continued with a small frown.

He looked back at Corvus cautiously. Gren never felt interested in dating before Corvus...So why did he want to learn more about _Corvus'_ dating life?

“W-what about you?” Gren grimaced and looked away as he heard his voice waver at the beginning. He risked another glance back up and Corvus looked at him with warm eyes.

“What about me?” he echoed, a warm smile on his face and leaning forward slightly.

Gren breathed in, trying to calm his nerves. “Are _you_ dating someone?”

Corvus looked a little taken aback, “No, not currently.” He paused as he leaned back and looked down at the table; he looked pensive, and Gren couldn’t help but wonder what he was contemplating.

“Although...I had a boyfriend junior year of high school,” he spoke as though he was still thinking his thoughts through. Then shifting his gaze back to Gren, he continued, “So, I am _interested_ in dating.”

Gren felt a shiver run up his spine. 

“But, I don’t see a reason to currently date. I’m good with where my relationships are at right now.” Corvus winked.

Gren sighed quietly in relief.

Corvus stood up, and gathered up his trash, “You got lunch, so I’ll get clean up. You done?”

Gren took his last bite of dessert, and gathered his trash into a single bag. “Thank you,” Gren said with a smile as he handed Corvus the bag.

Corvus nodded, patted Gren on the shoulder, then left the study room.

Gren took a deep breath, folded his arms on the table and rested his head in them. He closed his eyes, breathed, and allowed his mind to wander to something other than school.

He felt his heart rate decrease. He focused on slowing his breathing.

He was calm. 

Sometimes his own thoughts around Corvus surprised even himself. Did he want to go out with Corvus? He enjoyed his company, _a lot,_ but when Corvus was talking about dating...that made him nervous, but _not in a bad way._ What did that even mean? Did that have to mean something? Did he have to sort it out right now?

 _No,_ he decided with a deep breath, _I don’t have to sort it out right now. Maybe when the feelings aren’t so fresh I could unpack it in smaller, more manageable, increments._

* * *

Corvus left the study room while maintaining full composure. As an ROTC cadet he was well practiced in maintaining his appearance. When your Area Manager can ask you a question about _any_ regulation you’re supposed to know at a moment’s notice during inspection, you learn to keep a neutral face and not panic.

He had leapt through trees, led a small group of high school junior cadets through winding rapids, given multiple oral reports in front of his classmates, and kept his poise even when teachers would suddenly call on him for an answer. Corvus always kept his cool. He would _maintain his composure_.  
…Until he could panic in the safety of his dorm or another private space.

 _This_ was not one of those places, however. This was the very busy, _very public_ , student center.

While there were bookshelves that he could retreat to, if necessary, there were also lots of tables, some quite large, for groups of students to meet. Then there were smaller tables on the inner perimeter balcony that overlooked the food area three stories below. This was the second student center built by the college and the updated architecture showed in how open the floor plan was, the intentional balance of academic and social space, and how much natural light was utilized.

Corvus took the trash from his and Gren’s lunch and walked to where trash and recyclables were sorted. _Maintaining composure. Not_ thinking about the conversation he just had with Gren. _Not_ thinking about his rapid heartbeat. _Not_ thinking about the new information he learned. _Not_ thinking about how cute Gren looked when his face flushed pink or red. And _definitely not_ thinking about how he just _froze_ at the end.

Corvus _wanted_ to sigh, _wanted_ to slouch down, put his head between his knees and let himself _think_ about it. _Think_ about what it could mean, because the back of Corvus’ mind kept a lingering presence that it was the worst case scenario, and he _really messed up._

 _But, logically, there are other angles and perspectives to consider._ He thought to himself as he sorted their lunch into their respective bins.

“Corvus!” He heard his name, and recognized it to be Sabah’s voice. 

A crack appeared in his composure and the foundation compromised. Because while Corvus usually prided himself on remaining calm until he was in a safe place, he started to notice that the definition should be expanded to being around “safe people” too. As in, people who he felt completely emotionally safe around. Sabah and Kazi qualified under those terms, and as he turned towards the voice his prediction was confirmed: both of them were here and coming his way.

With each step they took Corvus could feel his front fractioning further. He managed to walk up to them, take each by the hand and pull them between two bookshelves, away from most of the tables, before looking back at them with (no doubt) a look of anxiety on his face.

“What are you guys doing here?” he whispered in a panic.

“It’s the student center. …We’re students.” Sabah said, raising her eyebrows and waving a hand as though that was the obvious conclusion. “Why are _you_ out and about? Isn’t this your study date-” Sabah stopped as she saw Corvus frantically wave his hands.

She exchanged a concerned look with Kazi and her eyes became more sympathetic.

“I take it we’re between bookshelves because you don’t want others to see you?” Kazi asked.

Corvus nodded, he needed to maintain composure, especially because other cadets and officers were always around campus, he needed to maintain his air of professionalism.

“And this is normally the time you study with Gren...” Kazi continued, piecing it together.

Corvus nodded.

Sabah looked in the direction of the study room, trying to peek from behind their current bookshelf before giving up and deciding to pretend to look at a book near the window to the study room. She returned even more inquisitive. “What happened?”

“Why? What did you see that would make you ask that?” To his dismay, he could still hear the hint of panic in his voice.

Kazi started, “Well, you’re less than composed...in public, which is uncharacteristic of you…”

“And Gren has his head in his arms in the room.” Sabah added. “Did you get into an argument?”

Corvus caved in and slouched to the ground. “No, but our conversation probably made him feel terrible...” He sighed, “I don’t know why I was pushing it. Well, I take that back, I _do_ know why I was pushing it, I really _like_ him and was hoping...But I need to let that go. I shouldn't have pushed the conversation in that direction...not after what he told me. But, I thought there was a _possibility,_ and I thought him blushing, and saying those nice things were encouraging signs, but blushing can be for negative feelings too… and he’s already a really nice guy so it could be... just _erg._ ” He leaned his head back against the shelf behind him, defeated, “I really _messed up._ ”

Sabah exchanged looks with Kazi again, and each moved to block Corvus from an average bystander’s view covering both sides of the bookshelf. Then they followed suit and sat on the cheaply carpeted floor of the student center.

“I’m afraid I’m going to need further clarification. I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think.” Kazi said warmly, putting a supportive hand on Corvus’ shoulder.

“Just tell us what happened.” Sabah placed her hand on his other shoulder, a friendly smile on her face.

It was no wonder these two became a “safe place” in Corvus’ mind.

“I was flirting with him. It went well. Well...I _thought_ it did. He was receptive to my compliments. It was nice.” Corvus smiled at the memory of Gren blushing.

“Okay, sounds good so far.” Sabah nodded.

“Then he said that he likes hanging out with me too. That I inspire him.”

“That also sounds good.” Kazi nodded.

“It was, and his _face_ was so…” _Cute. Adorable. Kissable._ “ _Err,_ I digress…” Corvus blushed. “So I asked him what he did when he wasn’t studying or working.”

“Well, that’s a natural part of you guys getting to know each other,” Kazi tried to encourage.

“Yeah, and that led us to talk about dating...and Gren said that he has never been interested in dating.”

“Oh.” Both Kazi and Sabah said at the same time.

“ _Exactly!_ And _that’s fine_! I can respect that, and let go of my crush, but the way he _phrased_ it was odd, like it was in the _past,_ so I asked if he was interested in dating _now._ ”

Both leaned in.

“And he said it depended on who it was with.”

Both Kazi and Sabah took a deep breath and slowly exhaled.

“Well, that’s not a rejection.” Kazi pointed out.

“Yeah, and I guess _because_ it wasn’t a clear rejection, it left a little hope in my heart.”

“Then what happened?” Sabah asked.

“He thought I was trying to set him up with someone. Can you believe that? Maybe it didn’t occur to him that I was asking because _I_ was interested? Maybe he just doesn’t see me that way?”

“Now you’re speculating. Go back to the events.” Kazi half-scolded.

Corvus half-smiled at Kazi’s manner of expressing affection. He appreciated them keeping him on topic. 

“Then he asked me if I was dating anyone.”

Both Kazi and Sabah’s eyes grew wide as they nodded.

“I told him that I wasn’t, but just in case he was asking me because _he_ was interested in _me,_ I told him I had a boyfriend in the past, that way he knew I was interested in dating men, and that I am interested in dating.”

“Did you say, _‘I’m interested in dating you’_ ?” Sabah asked.

“No, but I did say it a little flirty…”

“Then what?” Kazi asked.

“Then he froze - no reaction, no blush, nothing. I mentally panicked and told him I was happy where my relationships were right now. And that’s true too! I don’t think we could date right now, even if it was mutual… _Erg,_ I even _winked_ at him! Then I got up, got our trash and left.”

Both Kazi and Sabah nodded.

“I feel so stupid! He said _he wasn’t interested_ and I just went and made myself _vulnerable_ like that. _Erg._ I should’ve kept my answers short. I shouldn’t have kept leaving hints that I _like_ him. If he was interested in me, he would’ve caught on by now...” Corvus put his head between his legs.

“But… and correct me if I misunderstood, he _didn’t_ say that he _wasn’t interested_ in _you_. In fact, him asking you if you are currently dating anyone would express that he seems to have an interest in _your_ dating life.” Kazi said.

Corvus raised his head back up, trying to figure out where Kazi misunderstood, because there _had_ to be some misunderstanding there. He opened and closed his mouth several times, not able to formulate a thought, with evidence, to contradict them.

“Okay, so maybe it’s not a complete rejection. But he froze. I probably made him really uncomfortable.”

“Maybe. Or maybe you just blew his mind with your flirting skills?” Sabah asked. Her hands went to both sides of her head to make the explosion gesture and sound effects. 

Corvus shot her a doubtful look.

She sighed, “...Or maybe he suddenly remembered a term paper, Corvus, there are countless reasons why he might’ve froze. Didn’t you tell us the guy is taking 21 credits? Isn’t that the reason why you only get to hang out by studying? He’s probably sleep deprived.”

And that was a rational possibility too.

“Disregard your romantic feelings towards him for a moment. Is saying that the two of you are friends an accurate statement?” Kazi asked.

 _If I didn’t have a crush on Gren, would we still be friends?_ He mentally asked himself.

He nodded, “Of course.”

Kazi smiled and placed their hands in their lap, “Then the solution is clear. If you’re worried that you hurt his feelings, then apologize just like you would to us.”

Sabah grinned, “We would talk it out and forgive you. No doubt, he would be the same, right?”

Corvus nodded, feeling much calmer now that he had a logical, actionable, plan, “That’s a good strategy. Thank you both.”

They smiled back until Sabah looked at her watch, “Yikes! It must’ve been ten minutes! He might be wondering where you are!” She stood up and peeked, “ _Huh,_ his head is still down... He really _might_ be sleeping...”

Corvus chuckled as he and Kazi also stood up. 

“I don’t think it’s ever intentional, but he does sometimes take power naps when we’re supposed to be studying. He has a really cute sle…” Sleeping face. _He has a really cute sleeping face,_ but he couldn’t say that aloud. Instead, Corvus cleared his throat. “I digress again. If he is asleep, he’ll wake up when I walk in. He’s a light napper.”

Kazi and Sabah both smiled back in understanding.

“Thank you, Kazi, Sabah, I feel better now that I have a plan on what to do when I go back in.”

“This was nice. Not the best case scenario, but I feel like our friendship level just went up.” Sabah smiled brightly, “Group hug?”

Kazi smiled and shook their head in amusement at Sabah's phrasing of what just happened, but complied with the request, along with a grinning Corvus, and gave each other a big group hug between the two bookshelves in the student center.

* * *

Gren heard the door open and he perked his head back up.

“Needing a nap?” Corvus asked gently as he moved back to his spot, his eyes sympathetic.

“I could always use one these days,” Gren said with a grin and a wink.

Corvus smirked as he pulled the textbook he had out back in front of him. “Hey, _umm_...Gren...I’m sorry if our conversation earlier made you uncomfortable. Anytime we’re talking just let me know if I cross a line, okay?”

Gren thought about it: _uncomfortable, huh?_

“Thanks for your consideration, Corvus. It did make me feel a _little_ uncomfortable, but not in a bad way where I felt in danger or had red flags going off in my head. It was...a _good type._ I mean, I think I need to feel a _little_ uncomfortable every now and then to help me stretch my comfort zone and grow as a person.” 

Gren made sure to catch Corvus’ eyes, he needed to make sure that Corvus could see the sincerity of what he was saying reflected in his own eyes. “And that’s what that conversation felt like. A _‘stretch-my-comfort-zone’-type_ of uncomfortable.”

Corvus grinned, “Same.”

Gren enjoyed Corvus’ smiles, but then the thought occurred, “Hey, Corvus, if I ever cross a line with you, please let me know too!”

Corvus nodded, “Promise.”

Gren let out a breath, _thank goodness._

Now back to studying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** Thank you for reading.  
> To whoever is reading this: stay as safe as you can, and know that you're loved. :)  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_ \- Unknown


	7. Networking…Not a Double Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m not sure what I’m more nervous about: meeting _the_ General Amaya and her wife _the_ General Janai, or that my head is turning this into a double date scenario instead of Gren trying to help me with networking.”

**Third Week of April - Near the End of the Spring Semester**

“You’re looking extra sharp for 7:30 on a Saturday morning,” Marcos said in the hallway while rubbing his eyes and letting out a small yawn. He was still in his PJs, and usually slept in on Saturdays, so Gren wondered why he was up.

“I don’t know about extra sharp...” He checked the mirror again: slacks and a dark grey, button-down, collared shirt. Gren thought it looked “breakfast casual”. It’s not like he was wearing a tie. 

“I have breakfast with General Amaya and Janai this morning,” Gren continued.

[Music notes rising and falling quickly](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IFiuVD-Xik) alerted him to a text. “Oh, that’s Corvus,” Gren said instinctively while pulling out his phone.

“Ready whenever u r” Gren read the text.  
“No rush”  
“Just excited”  
“And nervous”  
“Both”  
“Take ur time” 

They came in rapid fire succession and Gren smiled at his phone. _Corvus you’re going to do great,_ he thought to himself, because how could anyone think Corvus was anything other than amazing? Even “amazing” didn’t fully cover it.

“Corvus, huh?” Marcos was grinning now.

“Yeah, today was the only day we could squeeze in him meeting General Amaya. We meant to do it earlier in the semester, but things kept happening. This was the best time before finals in three weeks,” Gren rambled as he checked his pockets, going over his mental checklist: wallet, keys, a few mints (because why not).

He finally looked at Marcos after checking everything, and the raised eyebrow made him blush. “Wait, are you suggesting something?”

“Not directly, but I‘m just saying that you seem to be more smiley after hearing that text tone.”

Gren blushed, “It makes it easier to know who’s texting. You have one too.”

Suddenly the sound of a bugle horn came from Gren’s phone and Marcos let out a small laugh.

“It’s [‘Sherwood Forest’](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gB13meZKbc4), I thought it suited you,” Gren said defensively. 

Marcos straightened his face again, “No, it does.” He turned around and waved, “I’m going back to bed. Have a good time.”

Gren gave a thumbs up and grinned, “Sounds good. Enjoy sleeping in.”

Marcos gave one last wave before closing his bedroom door. Gren looked at his phone for the time: 7:36 am. He should be heading out or he’ll be late for being early.

He glanced at Marcos’ text from a moment ago, “Relax, and have a good time ”

 _Will do,_ Gren thought to himself, checking if he had all needed items one last time before heading out the door.  


* * *

Corvus paced around his dorm room. His hair looked great, his clothes were pressed, stylish but not too informal - _“breakfast casual”,_ he had already texted Gren that he was ready, and now all that was left to do was wait. And waiting was hard. 

Kazi, a morning person, had helped earlier by redoing his dreads yesterday evening and giving their opinions on different outfits, but now, sitting in their desk chair under their bunk, swiveling as Corvus walked back and forth, back and forth, they were starting to look a little off-put by the pacing.

“It’s going to go great.” They smiled wearily, probably not sure how to help.

“I’m not sure what I’m more nervous about: meeting _the_ General Amaya _and_ her wife _the_ General Janai, or that my head is turning this into a double date scenario instead of Gren trying to help me with networking,” he said, still pacing.

“It’s understandable to be nervous about both parts.” Kazi gestured ‘slow down’ with their hands and Corvus took the hint to mean ‘sit down’ and did so in his desk chair. “General Janai married General Amaya when we were in middle school, but before that she was a hero to all of the Sunfire Kingdom. I think General Amaya has a similar reputation here in Katolis, correct? Even if Gren wasn’t with you, meeting the two of them would be enough to cause me to panic.”

Corvus nodded when suddenly his phone chimed two high notes followed by a low chord - “[Circles](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LSZHbKae-p4)”, Gren’s text tone. 

He reached into his back pocket: “I am on my way! :)” 

Corvus grinned; Gren always used complete sentences in his texts. Saying “Omw!” wouldn’t even occur to him. Why Corvus found this adorable he didn’t fully understand himself. It was just very _Gren._

Taking a deep breath and putting his phone back into his rear pocket, Corvus looked down at his hands, rubbing them together, and nodded both to himself and to process what Kazi said. Kazi interpreted the silence as an invitation to continue.

“In addition, things have been going well with Gren, correct? And we’re getting to the end of the semester. It would be natural for you to want to move things forward and this breakfast scenario almost feels like a preview of what could be.”

Corvus continued to nod, Kazi’s words sinking into his head. That was true. When the semester was done, and Gren was no longer taking a ridiculous load, he wanted to see if he could get one step closer to dating Gren. Or rather, to take a step closer to see if Gren was interested in dating him. Corvus kept trying to read Gren’s signals; he thought most of them were positive. In fact, there were several times Corvus thought that _Gren_ was trying to flirt with _him,_ but then...Gren would retreat: change subject or completely freeze.

He looked towards the door, the movements of his hands drumming against his thighs and his tapping foot helped with the jitters he felt in his heart. It was possible that Gren was equally nervous about their relationship. He had never dated anyone before. He was never interested in dating…So, if Corvus was going to be completely optimistic about this, **_if_** (and it was a giant **_if_** ) Gren was interested in Corvus, maybe Gren was scared? 

_I mean, I’m scared, and I dated before. If this was completely new, and maybe even unexpected, then it might be terrifying,_ Corvus thought to himself.

Corvus looked back down in thought, folding his hands back together and resting them against his mouth. The question was, what made it comfortable for him to date when it was new to him?

His foot was now tapping rapidly and there was a part of his brain that registered that Kazi was probably looking at him with concern, but he tried to focus on coming up with an idea.

Wait…

Kazi… Sabah… Friends…

When he was in high school, he went on group dates with his friends before actually dating his ex.

Corvus’ foot stopped and he looked up to Kazi, who looked reasonably concerned.

“Kazi, I have a huge favor to ask,” he said slowly.

Kazi leaned forward and nodded for Corvus to continue. 

“Not this semester, but when we come back in the fall, would you mind going on a group date with me and Gren? I’m going to ask Sabah too,” he added quickly, “I just...I think it will help, but I don’t want you to feel used or left out.”

“Actually, I’ve been wanting to meet him.” Kazi nodded and smiled. “You speak so highly of him and I would like to practice my KSL on someone other than you,” they teased.

Corvus let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Thanks. Do you think Sabah-?”

“In a heartbeat,” Kazi answered with a small laugh before Corvus was able to get the question fully out.

Corvus nodded and smiled; that checked out.

Kazi took a deep breath, put a hand on their chest, and smiled, “You seem so much more relaxed now, _I_ feel relieved. I didn’t realize how nervous _I_ was on _your_ behalf.”

Corvus smiled further, “Kazi, you’re the best.”

“I know.” They smiled cheekily.

Just then a knock on the door. They both turned to look at it then turned to look at each other with an understanding look of: _Wish me luck._

And: _Good luck,_ with a nod.

* * *

Gren walked up to Corvus’ dorm door and knocked. Why was he so nervous?

“I’m heading out, Kazi.” He could hear Corvus’ voice on the other side.

The door opened and Corvus stepped out. Dark green patterned button-up with the top a little open, the sleeves fashionably rolled up to his elbows. A nice pair of dark blue jeans to match. He looked- 

“Dashing...” Gren slipped.

Corvus raised an eyebrow and that’s all it took to snap Gren out of his daze, a little flushed at being caught staring.

Corvus walked a little ahead. “Thanks for driving, but I was expecting you to just text when you were here. You didn’t have to come to the door,” he said as they were heading towards the elevator.

“That probably would’ve been faster...I didn’t think about that. I figured, since you gave me the room number, you didn’t mind me coming up. Unless you prefer me not to?” Gren asked while pushing the elevator button. He was personally enjoying the extra few minutes together and thought coming up was worth it.

“No, it’s fine. I am getting some weird prom flashbacks though. You didn’t buy me a boutonniere, did you?” He nudged Gren’s side, eliciting a smile.

“No, but I did leave the bouquet of flowers in the car,” Gren replied.

Corvus’ eyes grew wider and his head did a double take, his eyebrow raised again.

Gren couldn’t help but to smile. “No, not really,” he said with a wink, hoping his voice sounded playful. 

Corvus let out a laugh, and nudged Gren in his side again. 

_Yes, coming up was definitely worth it._ Gren beamed.  


* * *

“I’m heading out, Kazi,” Corvus said while getting up and waving before dashing out the door.

As he slipped out, Gren was waiting outside, _looking sharp_ too. His grey shirt really made his blue eyes pop. His expression, however, was anything but sharp; instead, his mouth was slightly agape, and he could’ve sworn he heard the word, “dashing” slip out of Gren’s mouth and he wasn’t entirely sure if it was a commentary on his dash out the door or on his outfit. He raised an eyebrow, about to ask him, when Gren seemed to snap back to his normal demeanor.

Corvus tried to hide his smile upon seeing Gren’s face flush pink and started walking down towards the elevator. The freshman dorm he lived in was especially gossipy and, while it was probably too early on a Saturday for most of them to be up and about, he didn’t want to linger either.

“Thanks for driving, but I was expecting you to just text when you were here. You didn’t have to come to the door,” he said as they were walking towards the elevator. Actually, he felt a little flattered that Gren would take the time to do so. He gave Gren his dorm number because there was a part of Corvus that wanted Gren to knock on his door and sweep him off his feet. It was very old-school chivalrous in the most endearing way, and he enjoyed the extra time in Gren’s company. 

“That probably would’ve been faster...I didn’t think about that,” he said thoughtfully as they walked. “I figured, since you gave me the room number, you didn’t mind me coming up. Unless you prefer me not to?” Gren asked while pushing the elevator button.

“No, it’s fine.” Corvus tried to hide another smile, “I am getting some weird prom flashbacks though. You didn’t buy me a boutonniere did you?” He joked and nudged Gren’s side, eliciting a smile from the ginger haired man.

“No, but I did leave the bouquet of flowers in the car.” Gren replied.

Corvus’ heart stopped.

Wait…

… ** _What?_**

“No, not really.” Gren smiled, **_winking_** at him, his eyes playful, ( _and adorable,_ ) and Corvus could finally breathe again so he let out a laugh, nudging Gren in his side again.

Gren talked about General Amaya and General Janai as they exited the building and walked towards the car, a mid-age silver subcompact car. It was apparent in his voice that Gren was excited for the three of them to finally meet.

Corvus responded to Gren’s excitement with his own, even expressing some of his nervousness, and Gren tried to build his confidence by telling him that it was _“just breakfast between friends”_ and how he _“should have nothing to worry about because you’re amazing in your own right.”_

And Corvus’ heart beat pleasantly fast as they talked the entire way to _The Jelly Tart,_ and his cheeks hurt from smiling too much, and he felt it more strongly in his heart then than even that morning: if Gren wanted it, Corvus would love to date him. He really would.

* * *

Breakfast with General Amaya and Janai was going well so far. Normally, if needed, Janai would translate for her wife, but instead Gren was requested to act as Amaya’s interpreter for the few parts of breakfast that needed interpretation so he could get extra practice. However, for the most part, Corvus was able to sign accurately and independently - especially while they were talking about casual everyday life. 

It was nice to see Corvus’ hard work paying off. Both he and Amaya enjoyed camping and they both were raised by military families. They even had a great discussion about the shifting military focus since the great peace, from standing ground troops to cyber threats.

Gren knew that Corvus’ focus was in the intel field but hadn’t realized what that really meant. It was interesting to hear bits of details from the world Corvus was trying to enter. Even more interesting that he and Amaya would sometimes talk about something without saying it. They just had an _“understanding”_ and only spoke vaguely about certain available technology.

Janai seemed to be keeping up with the _“understanding”_ as well. Durin and the Sunfire Kingdom were Katolis’ closest allies, and she was a general in her own right, so it made sense that Janai was in the loop of things.

In Gren’s opinion, Corvus couldn’t have made a better first impression if he’d tried. Gren’s heart was overflowing with happiness for his friend. If he imagined Corvus as the sun, then Gren would be the full moon reflecting all his happiness back.

He glanced from Corvus back to Amaya.

“So what are your plans for the summer? Have you looked into an internship?” Amaya signed to Corvus.

“I thought about that; my ROTC program offers some, but I really need to be back with my folks this summer. I’ll be working as a camp counselor during that time.”

Amaya grinned, “Still counts as a leadership role, and that’s nice that you’ll be outdoors too.”

“Yeah, I’m looking forward to seeing the kids. Some have come every year since I started in high school.”

Amaya smiled and nodded before returning to Gren, “And we get to keep you for the summer, right?”

Gren returned the smile and nodded, “I got the paperwork in order for the next level of security clearance too. Should be cleared by the time summer starts.” 

“Good. You’re one of my favorite interpreters to work with. I look forward to when we can hire you full time.”

Gren blushed, “Thank you. It’s an honor to work with you.”

Corvus smiled and returned to the couple. “So what are your plans for the summer? Taking a summer trip?”

“In June, we spend a week in the Sunfire Kingdom for the summer solstice festival, and Callum’s birthday is in July, so we will take some time off and visit Amaya’s side.” Janai signed a little slower than usual and seemed to pay close attention if Corvus was able to follow.

Amaya nodded in confirmation.

“Aside from working, I hope you both will enjoy your break. You have to enjoy them while you still have them. Amaya and I always made time for stargazing during the summer,” Janai continued.

Amaya looked at Corvus, “Gren lives for work.”

Corvus chuckled, “I noticed. Did he tell you he’s taking 21 credits? The only time I see him is for studying.”

Amaya half rolled her eyes and half smirked. “Surprise, surprise,” she signed, sticking her tongue out at the end to show that she was teasing.

Janai chuckled too, “I understand your work ethic Gren, but you’re going to be 21 going on 40 at this pace. Make sure to at least have fun with friends.”

Gren smiled, “That’s what I’m doing right now!”

Two quiet “ _Aww..._ ”s came from Corvus and Janai and Amaya got up to ruffle his hair affectionately. 

“I’m glad we were able to meet up for breakfast,” Gren signed.

“Yes, thank you for taking the time,” Corvus added.

“The pleasure is ours,” Janai smiled.

“Let’s do this again in the fall,” Amaya signed.  


* * *

The drive back to Corvus’ dormitory was quieter, but it was a comfortable silence. Gren suspected that Corvus was an introvert like him, and needed time to recoup some energy. The times when Gren was able to glance at him, Corvus looked deep in thought.

Gren pulled up to the curb of Corvus’ dorm. “I can park, but I get the impression you don’t want me to walk you back to your room..?”

Corvus snapped out of it, half-chuckled and shook his head. “No, I’m good, but thanks for asking.”

Gren blushed and looked at his steering wheel. “Yeah, I know it’s a little old fashioned, but my family always taught us that it was polite.” _Plus it would give me five extra minutes with you._ Gren thought to himself.

“No judgement here, I’ll take you up on it one of these days when I’m not living in a freshman dorm.” Corvus said. Gren turned his head to look at him, Corvus’ eyes showed warmth.

Gren nodded. “I’m glad you were able to meet Amaya and Janai,” he said softly.

“Talk about a power couple, they were **_amazing!_** Makes me want to work even harder so I can work with them!”

Gren smiled, “You’re pretty amazing too, I know you’ll work with them someday. They would be lucky to have you on their team...” He lowered his voice on the last sentence and sounded almost wistful.

Corvus flushed. “Thanks,” he said softly.

Gren's brain then caught up with two factors:  
1) What he, Gren, _just said_ \- It was a true statement, _one that made Corvus happy,_ he noted, but definitely _not_ one he would _normally verbalize_ _,_ and perhaps more noteworthy...  
2) _His tone_ in saying it. - Soft, low volume. _Why am I whispering?_ He mentally panicked, _We're the only ones in the car!_

He could feel the heat rise to his cheeks again and his eyes darted back to the steering wheel.

Which led to...  
3) _Don't panic!_ _Corvus is still in the car with me, and I don't want him to feel uneasy._

He risked a glance at Corvus, who also seemed lost in his own thoughts. Although Corvus looked more _pensive_ than _panicked,_ like he was thinking out a strategy.

Gren felt a little relieved upon seeing this. Exhaling a breath he didn't realize he was holding, it freed up enough brain space for Gren to wonder: _what is it about Corvus that always has me reacting this way?_

"Gren?" Corvus' voice was also low, soft.

Why did it feel like his heart was melting in the breath of Corvus' voice?

"Y-yeah?" Yup, there was the stammering again.

 _It's okay,_ Gren mentally told himself, _no need to be nervous, it's just Corvus._

"I was thinking...Would you like to go out and, I don't know, maybe do an escape room or something together next semester? You'll have less classes, right?"

"Go out?" Gren repeated.

 _Like a date?_ He froze at the thought.

He needed time to process this, it was a nice thought, ( _wait, 'it was a nice thought'?_ ) but it didn't _make sense_.. _._

"Yeah, you can invite your roommate," Corvus continued, looking off into the distance, like he could already imagine the event, and Corvus looking away made it easier for Gren to look directly at him again.

"I'll invite mine," he continued. "The average escape room usually needs at least four to five people. Between your roommate, Kazi, Sabah, and us of course, we'll have five. It's a perfect number." Corvus looked back at Gren, his face cool and calm, but his eyes excited, "What do you think?"

Oh! Hanging out, as a group, _as friends_. That made _way_ more sense.

Gren grinned fondly at Corvus, his heart starting to calm down, and nodded, "I'll ask Marcos if he'd be interested."

Corvus' face lit up, " _ **Awesome!**_ _Uh..._ " He grimaced in a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment, before returning to his normal _composed_ self, "Text me when you get home safely and also when you hear from Marcos. I'll ask Kazi and Sabah and once I have the numbers I can start researching rooms." Corvus had a fire in his eyes that made him more endearing than usual, and it was nice to see him a little more animated for a moment.

"Sounds good," Gren smiled, still faintly aware of his heartbeat and the changes in tempo based on Corvus' levels of excitement.

Corvus stepped out of the car and waved to Gren. "See you Tuesday, Gren. Don't forget to text."

"See you Tuesday, Corvus, and I'll text you when I get home." Gren waved.

Corvus closed the door, waved one last time and walked into his dorm building. Gren watched him until he was safely inside. (He figured it was the next best thing in terms of politeness.)

As he drove away he remembered all the studying he still needed to do, the projects he needed to work on. There were four weeks left in the spring semester, but Gren was already looking forward to the fall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** I never state it but Gren’s text tone for Corvus is [_“Stargaze”_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IFiuVD-Xik) because it sounds like how his heart feels wherever he gets a text from Corvus: rises and falls quickly. [_“Bloom”_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc_VeLeH5oM) was Gren’s original text tone for Corvus, but the sound seemed to amplify Gren’s nerves (too on point) and so he changed it to _“Stargaze”_. Gren also felt the name matched Corvus’ love for the outdoors. (Which made it all the more funny that Janai brings up stargazing to the boys during breakfast. XD)
> 
> Similarly, [_“Circles''_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LSZHbKae-p4) is Corvus’ text tone for Gren because he felt like it matched his sunny yet calm personality. When he hears it, a mental image of Gren smiling comes to Corvus’ mind.  
>  _Practicality wise:_ it was short enough to not be distracting to others, but long enough to ensure he didn’t accidentally miss a text.
> 
> * * *
> 
>  **ASL Resource that informed parts of this chapter:**  
> ["Dos and Don'ts of Interacting with Deaf Community"](https://youtu.be/pDA_EXFTpxo) by [ChrissyCan'tHearYou](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfEalJW91FE9BDH9xUVDvvg)
> 
> **Chapter Doodles:**  
> 


	8. Hugging

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Why is this so hard?_ Gren thought to himself. It was definitely harder to say goodbye now than it was before winter break.

**End of the Second Week of May, First Day of Summer Break**

Gren looked at the iced coffee in front of him: milk, no sugar. It was still a little too bitter for his tastes, but he was getting more used to it because it served a very important need: helping him stay awake for late night studying. He used to go for more dessert-like coffee: frappuccinos, caramel mochas, or _at the very least_ a few spoonfuls of sugar in his coffee, but the resulting sugar crash made that no longer an option. 

He took a sip and winced a little at the bitterness, but whatever face he involuntarily made quickly changed as soon as he heard Corvus’ laugh.

“Still too bitter?” he asked, his eyes warm and still smiling from his earlier laughter.

“I think I need to get used to the bitterness. I’m training my tastebuds,” Gren said, only half serious.

Corvus nodded, “Training your tastebuds is the hardest type of PT. At the beginning of the year, ROTC would have us do a shot of black coffee with the goal of us drinking a full cup by the end of the year.” Corvus calmly took a sip of his coffee and Gren’s eyes grew a little wide. He was 99% certain that Corvus was joking, but then there was that 1% doubt…

Shortly after Corvus set his cup down, Gren causally leaned in to take a peek at what he was drinking...dark but definitely not black coffee.

Corvus brought the cup back up to his lips, Gren’s eyes following naturally. It was Corvus’ grin that reminded Gren that he was _now staring at Corvus’ lips_ and he probably should stop doing that.

“You’re kidding,” Gren half-smiled.

Corvus continued to smile, trying to hide it behind his coffee mug, “Yes, but it was cute that you needed to check.”

Gren took another sip of his coffee, involuntarily making whatever face he made earlier.

Corvus laughed again, although Gren could tell he was trying to stifle it. Gren didn’t mind; he knew Corvus wasn’t laughing at his expense, and he enjoyed making Corvus laugh, his heart felt lighter as a result.

“Why not just add sugar to it?” Corvus asked, his voice still light.

“Because I’m trying to avoid the sugar crash,” Gren explained.

Corvus continued to smile, “Maybe add more milk? There’s a little sugar in milk, but it’s not like you’re adding a spoonful.”

Gren looked at the cup, “That’s a good idea. The glass is just too full. I’ll just need to…”

“I can take a sip if you want,” Corvus offered.

Gren tilted his head slightly, “I don’t think a sip will…”

Corvus smirked and rocked his head back and forth, “Fine, a few gulps. Enough so you have some room to put more milk in.”

Gren looked from his iced coffee to Corvus. “That would be nice. Thank you, Corvus,” he smiled sincerely.

Corvus’s eyes darted away momentarily, his face looking almost a little flushed, before grabbing Gren’s cup, “It’s a win-win, more coffee for me and more tolerable for you.”

After Corvus kindly fell on that figurative sword, Gren added some more milk and returned to the table, mixing the coffee and milk until it was a lighter color.

“Better?” Corvus smiled.

He took a sip, “Definitely, thanks!” Gren smiled brightly.

Corvus looked back to his coffee and took another sip, the heat from his coffee must be the thing that was causing his cheeks to flush, Gren realized. 

Gren continued to smile, leaned forward, and tilted his head slightly while looking at Corvus. Corvus actually had a habit of hiding behind food or a nearby beverage whenever he wanted to hide an expression. Well, not just any expression - it mostly seemed to be smiles, and Gren just couldn’t understand why he would try to hide those because Corvus had one of the brightest and most beautiful smiles he had seen.

Corvus started to fidget under his gaze and Gren snapped out of his thought, leaning back into his chair.

“So what time are your parents coming to help you move out?” he asked. The entire reason they were meeting in the late morning was so they would have one more time to hang out before Corvus left for the summer.

“We have to be completely out of the room by fourteen hundred… _err_...two o’clock. So they’ll be here a little before noon.”

A look of panic crossed Gren’s face, _Wait, what time was it?_

Corvus chuckled and stirred his coffee absentmindedly, “We have time, I set an alarm for when I should be leaving.”

Gren let out a breath of relief and could feel his shoulders relax, “That was a good idea. Without the strict schedule of classes and study times, I lose track of time pretty easily.”

Corvus gave a sideways grin, and raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, so _even with_ a strict schedule I get lost in my work and lose track of time easily,” Gren chuckled.

Corvus chuckled too, “That checks out.” He looked up at Gren, “Although, I am going to miss our study sessions,” Corvus said, his tone sad.

“We’ll do them again next year too, right?” Gren asked, maybe too eagerly he noted to himself.

Corvus seemed to perk up, “I’d really enjoy that...”

“And then there’s the escape room!” Gren added, he was trying to pull out anything that would cheer Corvus up.

A small smile appeared on Covus’ face, “That’s true. I already booked the room. It’s detective-themed.”

Gren smiled back, “I’m looking forward to it!”

Corvus' smile grew enough that he needed to hide it behind his coffee mug, and Gren’s smile grew wider at what he considered to be an important accomplishment.

When he put his mug back down he returned back to business, “So what’s your crazy schedule for the summer?”

“Classes every day except Friday. Monday/Wednesday, and Tuesday/Thursday night classes are from 7:30 until 10:00.”

“Yikes, that’s pretty late.”

Gren played it down, “It’s pretty standard for summer. I think the school understands that a lot of us need to work. The other common time is from 4:30 - 7:00. If I didn’t take my extra classes in the spring that would’ve been my B-session class time.”

Corvus nodded, “...I’m grateful my program doesn’t require summer school.” 

Gren shrugged, “You get used to it. The only bad part, that I can think of, is that the campus is poorly lit during the summer at night. I think they only put half of the normal lighting on to try to conserve energy. I know it sounds a little silly, but truth be told, I get a little spooked by it.” Gren chuckled, “It’s the only time I actually drive onto campus, and I walk back to my car super quickly. You would think I was in a speed walking race. Oddly enough, driving doesn’t save me too much time, by the time I get home it’s usually around 10:30-ish.”

“What time does work start?” Corvus looked a little nervous in asking.

“Six am,” Gren replied, taking another sip of coffee.

Corvus flinched.

“But I get off at 3:30!” Gren half-chuckled, half-defended. “So I have the afternoon to study and get stuff done,” He explained. It really was an insane schedule - deep down, he realized this.

Corvus chuckled lightly and nodded to himself, “Yup, you’re definitely crazy.” He looked up and smiled, “But not in a bad way. Just don’t overwork yourself.”

Gren smiled back, “I’ll try not to. What about you? How does summer look like for you?”

“Mostly me helping Mom and Dad by working at the local rec camp. With me working there it’s 50% off for my little sister to be in a summer program. That allows them to work without a babysitter during summer break as well as lets me earn some money.”

“Asha’s twelve, right?” Gren asked, taking another drink of his coffee; it was definitely better with more milk. _Corvus is a coffee genius._

“Yup, and Chlo is twenty-one. Although, Chlo has summer school since she’s working to be a physical therapist. Once again, I _do not_ envy you guys,” Corvus smirked.

“So is it a day camp or do you guys camp out overnight?”

“Both!” Corvus said with enthusiasm. “It depends on the program. My first session is day camp where we get to do scavenger hunts, ziplines and obstacle courses. The second session is overnight camp with hikes, rock climbs, rapids, and night walks. The last session is the same as the first. I really enjoy it. This will be my fifth year.”

“I can see you being a great camp counselor! I bet you’re great with the kids too!” Gren beamed and was even more overjoyed to see Corvus get a little bashful, hiding behind his cup of coffee and taking a sip.

“I try to be patient with them, and we definitely have fun, I don’t let them get away with much though. I’m one of the stricter counselors, but the kids seem to know I care. I mean, emotional and physical safety are important, and nobody's getting hurt on my watch.”

Gren continued smiling, thinking it was nice seeing this side of Corvus, but suddenly the alarm from Corvus’ phone went off.

 _Time to go…_ Gren thought sadly.

Corvus turned it off and looked at Gren, his expression reflecting what Gren felt on the inside. “ _Umm…_ I guess I need to get going...”

“C-can I walk with you for a little while?” There it was again, the wavering voice. He had been so good about it lately around Corvus, but he started to notice that it always came out when he was extra nervous.

Corvus blinked a few times, probably processing, but then grinned, “Sure, it’ll be nice to have a few extra minutes together.”

And Gren smiled because it was exactly what he was thinking too. They finished what was left of their drinks, placed their glasses in the cleaning trays and started walking in the direction of the freshman dormitory. 

“Did I tell you that my roommates and I got into the apartment building for next year?” Corvus said with a hint of pride.

“That’s impressive, I thought it was only for juniors and above.”

“They had extra room and award the leftovers to sophomores with ‘exceptional GPAs’.” He grinned cheekily and Gren felt his heartbeat increase from his adorable expression.

Gren clapped whole-heartedly, “Awesome work then!” He finished clapping and gave Corvus two big thumbs up with a smile so wide it made his cheeks hurt.

Corvus smiled bashfully, and looked down, “Thanks.” His gaze stayed focused on a distant spot on the ground, his eyes had that look they frequently did when he was thinking through something, then he peeked back at Gren, “So…” he grinned, “Maybe you can actually visit my place next year?”

“That would be fun! Maybe you can visit mine too! I’ll still be living in the same apartment. It’s off campus though…”

“I don’t mind! It’d be nice to see life outside of campus...” Corvus slowed down, and stopped in a quieter area of the path, surrounded by trees. He took a breath and straightened up. “I should say good-bye here. I’m sure the freshman dorm is busy with parents and students leaving...”

“Yeah, of course!” He tried to sound cheerful, “I understand…” Gren nodded, and he really _did_ understand, but… 

Gren looked down. _Why is this so hard?_ he thought to himself. It was definitely harder to say goodbye now than it was before winter break.

“I’m going to miss you, Corvus.” The words barely even registered as a thought before Gren heard them escape his mouth. He felt flushed after registering what he’d said and continued to look off to the side, not really wanting to see Corvus’ reaction. _Why did I say that? It probably came across as weird._

“Me too, Gren.” Corvus’ voice was low and Gren felt his heart skip a beat when Corvus said his name in a soft tone. He looked up to see Corvus’s warm hazel eyes looking back at him, and they stayed like that for a beat before it became too much for Gren and he needed to look away with a bashful smile.

“So… _umm…_ can I text you during the summer?” Corvus asked. His voice sounded lighter, almost nervous.

“That would be great!” Gren’s voice sounded nervous too - higher in pitch, faster in speed. Why was he nervous?

“Good! Good, gotta make sure you’re not over working y’know, and that you’re getting home safe from your late classes,” he smirked and play-jabbed Gren on the shoulder.

“And you’re not falling off cliffs or getting overturned in rapids,” Gren joked back, well at least he _hoped_ it came across as playful banter. He wasn’t exactly good at this (whatever _“this”_ was) and, if he was honest with himself, he was too nervous to be thinking straight.

Corvus laughed. “Gren, what type of camp instructor do you take me for?” he teased, nudging Gren in the side.

“Well, you never were afraid of taking risks.” Gren continued to laugh along with Corvus. His heart was beating too quickly now. He had forgotten to be embarrassed by his warm cheeks. He was stalling, he recognized it, but he was enjoying it. 

Then almost just as quickly, he felt Corvus take his hand and pull him close.

_-Thud-_

Corvus’ arms were wrapped around Gren’s sides, tucked under his arms.

Gren froze for a moment. 

_Corvus is hugging me,_ he realized.

 _Corvus is hugging me,_ he repeated in his head.

_Hug back!_

Gren wrapped his arms over Corvus’ and found that, since they were similar heights, maybe two inches off, his head had a nice spot in the crook of Corvus’ neck that it wanted to go, but he kept it to the side of Corvus’ head.

The hug was warm, and the weight of Corvus’ arms around him felt nice, like an anchor. It felt safe, _right,_ like a version of home he never realized existed, it even smelled nice. Gren exhaled slowly and savored the feelings that washed over him.

He could hear Corvus inhale, before slowly exhaling from his nose, and almost intuitively Gren knew the hug had reached its end.

Corvus pulled back and looked almost nervous as he seemed to be trying to gauge Gren’s reaction.

Gren took an additional step back, and signed, because he genuinely didn’t trust his voice in the current moment. “Thank you for becoming my friend. Studying with you made the past few months not only bearable, but fun. I deeply value our time together and look forward to hanging out in the fall.”

Corvus smiled brightly and half-laughed, “You know I only caught maybe 70% of that, right? Sign slower!” He nudged Gren again, and Gren now had a new heightened awareness of _any spot_ Corvus touched him.

Gren laughed. “You’ll get it soon,” he signed with a smile, still not trusting his voice.

Corvus nodded as he started walking backwards, “Got it.” He took another deep breath. “Bye, Gren. I’ll text you soon.” He waved.

Gren also took in a deep breath and found his vocal chords. “Bye, Corvus. Text you soon,” he echoed with a wave and watched as Corvus turned around and left.

Gren stayed until Corvus was out of sight, then started walking in the direction of his apartment, his brain replaying parts of what just happened like a movie.

His eyes went wide, face flushed completely, and his heart raced exponentially. 

_What...what was that?_ He mentally panicked.  


* * *

Without saying a word Corvus closed the door to his dorm, climbed up to his bare mattress, belly flopped onto it, and took a deep breath. Over the course of his walk back to his room Corvus went from cloud nine, back to Katolis, and into complete self-loathing - maybe even six units under.

“Are you well?” Kazi asked, voice concerned; he could hear them stop packing up the last of their desk items.

“I just…” He took another breath, “I just need a moment,” Corvus responded, muffled by the mattress. His brain replayed what happened earlier. 

Gren was smiling, so big and beautiful, and his laughter so wonderful, and Corvus was already full of nervous adrenaline so Gren saying… 

_“Well, you never were afraid of taking risks.”_

...

In general, he tried living his life fully embracing opportunities that came along, _assessing_ the risk/reward benefits and making _strategic_ decisions accordingly. But _just now_ …It was almost like he disregarded any logical decision, accepted “risk taker” as his new personal mantra, and pulled Gren towards him and…

“Kazi, I acted before I thought it through.” He sat up and turned toward Kazi, “It’s completely unlike me.”

Kazi walked towards Corvus’ bunk bed, and smiled understandably, “True, that doesn’t sound like you at all.”

Corvus sighed, and resolved himself to getting off the mattress and sitting on his desk chair; he had already finished packing long before meeting up with Gren this morning. 

“So what exactly did you do?” Kazi asked, also sitting in their chair, and swiveling back and forth while still packing up items left on their desk. 

“I hugged Gren goodbye.”

Kazi paused for a second, and looked at Corvus before asking, “And...is that a _bad_ thing? Oh! Does he not like being touched?”

“That’s the problem, I’m not sure...He didn’t act like he hated it; he even hugged me back...”

“I see. Normally, I would understand your concern, but you’ve already established with Gren if you crossed a line he would let you know, correct?”

Corvus nodded, “Yeah…”

Kazi smiled, “And he _would actually_ tell you, right?”

Corvus nodded, “I _think_ so…”

Kazi gave Corvus a reassuring smile, “Then I’m sure it’s fine. Unless you’re concerned about something else?”

Corvus looked away and shrugged, “I guess…? I think it’s the principle of the thing. I’m a think- _then_ -do person, Kazi, I just don’t want to fall so deep into my crush that I lose that.”

Kazi tilted their head slightly and scrunched up their eyebrows in confusion.

“Like...I don’t want to like Gren so much that I start acting impulsively _all the time_.”

Kazi looked even more baffled. 

“I know it’s just a hug, but I acted without consent - I just _went_ for it. I don’t want to keep taking unnecessary risks without _fully thinking the consequences through…_ ” Corvus sighed, “I guess I just analyze everything I do, because I don’t want to come across the wrong way. I want to respect Gren’s space and feelings. Sometimes I think about what I did and think _‘if he doesn’t have feelings for me, was that okay to do?’_

“Remember when we were watching those ‘classic action’ movies for your film study class? You were pointing out how those ‘classic films’ didn’t portray respectful relationships because the common love trope for that decade was basically the guy forcing himself on his love interest, and the love interest ‘playing coy’ and ‘acting’ like they didn’t love the guy but ‘secretly did’.”

Corvus leaned back in his chair with a groan, “ _Erg,_ like that one space movie! The woman said ‘ _no_ ’ several times, literally walked away, and the guy blocked her exit, entered her personal space, and _forced_ a kiss on her. The only reason the audience thought it was ‘romantic’ was because the music playing in the background told us it was _supposed to be_ , but if we just looked at the actions - _he was being a creep_!” 

Kazi nodded and their facial expression indicated they were trying to piece together where this was going, “Yes, I remember that paper…”

Corvus frowned and looked at his fidgeting hands, “I know I have a crush on Gren, I’m sure I have a bias for _wanting_ to interpret his feelings to be reciprocal…I just…” He took a breath, feeling frustrated with himself, “...I want to make sure I’m not like the creepy space outlaw…I don’t want to force myself on him and blind myself into thinking it’s mutual when it might not actually be.”

Kazi reached out and touched the back of Corvus’ hand so he would look up. “I understand your concern, and reflecting on if our actions are respectful is _always a good thing,_ but perhaps, you are over compensating for your known bias by going in the opposite direction and assuming that it is impossible for Gren to have feelings for you?”

Corvus frowned and tilted his head to the side, swaying it back and forth in consideration.

Kazi smiled, eyes reflecting that they were trying to be patient and supportive. “Maybe it’s like what happened after midterms? Your misunderstanding then? _Hmm?_ Walk me through the events of the situation.”

Corvus nodded, “Well… _er_...we stopped on the trail to the dorm, you know, the one that goes through the wooded area?”

“Yes.”

“And, I guess, we were _trying_ to say goodbye…?”

“Okay…?”

“Well, he kinda said, out of nowhere, that he was going to miss me.”

Kazi smiled, “ _Aww,_ that’s sweet.”

Corvus blushed at the memory, “Yeah...It made me happy and I got nervous and we talked about texting and, I think he was _trying_ to flirt, and he said something about taking risks and then I impulsively grabbed his hand, pulled him towards me and hugged him.”

Kazi smiled, “Corvus, based on what you just said, is it possible that you subconsciously read the situation, realized that Gren wouldn’t mind a hug goodbye, and acted appropriately? That would match with your typically analytical nature.”

“Maybe?” He perked up a little, but didn’t seem fully satisfied with that solution.

Kazi placed their finger at the bottom of their chin and looked into the distance, really thinking, “Still not quite it though…” they mumbled to themself.

“It’s the acting without consent,” Corvus said, more certain than before. “I really think that’s it. Like, I _pulled_ him into it. I’m glad he seemed receptive to the hug, but for me, the fact that I would force myself into his personal space without his permission, I think, is what is really bothering me.”

Two high notes followed by a low chord came from his phone and instinctively an image of Gren smiling came to Corvus’ mind. He pulled out his phone and checked the text.

“Back home safely. I’m glad we got to see each other before you left for home. Good luck moving out and safe travels. TTYS! :)”

Corvus smiled at his phone, of course Gren would wish him luck, it was just like him… _wait…_

“(I think I used “TTYS” correctly, right?)” Gren texted again.

Corvus laughed and looked at Kazi, “I’m over here worried about me violating his space, and Gren is worried about if he used a text acronym correctly.” He shook his head, “We’re in completely different worlds…” He showed the text to Kazi.

Kazi smiled to themself. “It seems so, but it’s like you’re trying to connect to each other in the ways you understand,” Kazi said with a satisfied grin, more to themself than to Corvus, since he was lost to Gren’s words.

“Thxs 4 the .”  
“And close!”  
“Ttys can b used 4 “talk to you soon” but most ppl use”  
“Ttyl = talk 2u l8r”  
“It’s usually in lower case”  
“Uppercase = shouting” Corvus texted back, smiling as he was typing out the messages.

“Oh! I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to shout at you. :(”

“Np! I’ll give u a pass this time ”

“Thanks, and ttyl. :)”

“Ttys ”

Kazi laughed and Corvus snapped back to attention, returning his phone to his pocket.

“You’re too cute. You had such a large smile on your face, it was like a kid during the summer solstice gift exchange.” They tried to stifle their laugh.

Corvus felt his cheeks grow hot, “I… _err_...Yeah...he has that effect on me…”

“Well, I’m glad you’re in better spirits.” Kazi smiled, “And Corvus, I was thinking about it while you were texting…”

“Yeah?”

“You were really upset with yourself for not asking for permission this time, but there’s nothing stopping you from asking next time. Next time just try to remember to ask, ‘may I have a hug?’ Or, _gosh,_ how does Sabah do it? Just say the word? _‘Hug?’_ and open your arms. The more aware of it you are, the more likely you’ll follow through.”

Corvus grinned, “Yeah, good point, Kazi. You always have good ideas.”

Kazi blushed and pushed their frames up, “Thank you. I try.”

Corvus smiled again and looked at Kazi’s desk behind them, “And you’re successful most of the time, but I don’t know what you were thinking packing at the last minute.”

Kazi turned with a sigh, “Sadly, a bit of a procrastinator, there.”

A ding from Corvus’ phone.

“Your parents?” Kazi asked.

“Probably. Let me check,” he pulled out his phone.

“Hi honey we are running about an hour behind make sure your stuff is ready so we are good to go love mom”

Corvus smiled affectionately at his phone. His mom loved speech-to-text, but never remembered to say “period” or “comma” to add punctuation, so it always came across as one long line of words. In addition, she always wrote her texts like it was a letter. He couldn’t wait to see her and Dad.

Until then…

“Okay, they’re running late. Kazi,” he looked at his roommate, “would you like help packing?”

Kazi nodded earnestly, “Yes! Please, and thank you.”

And they got to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   * Thank you for reading. Encouraging comments are always appreciated. :)
>   * Stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. ❤️  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_  
>  \- Unknown
> 

> 
> * * *
> 
> **Chapter Doodles:**  
> 


	9. Video Chatting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was definitely new. Well, maybe it wasn’t “new” per se, but being aware of these feelings _and_ having time to unpack them was definitely new.

**Third week of May, Summer**

There was one week between the spring semester ending and his internship beginning that Gren spent visiting his parents for a few days. His older brother still lived in the same town, but his older sister was on active duty in the Tidebound Archipelago Seas. Thankfully, he would get to see her later in the summer.

Gren found himself texting Corvus more during this time. He guessed that was because he was used to talking with Corvus, and would find himself texting him a few times a day. The texts weren’t anything of importance, but little things: a thought he found interesting as he got an early start to his summer reading, or brainstorming ideas for his senior project (the first class for that will start in C-Session), recommending something to watch on Netflix, or just asking how the day went. Corvus would text back just as casually, encouraging his ideas for his senior project by trying to ask meaningful questions to get him to think about it further, as well as playfully teasing him for starting on schoolwork during his time off, recommending shows and sending reaction gifs from them so Gren would become more intrigued, or lovingly bemoaning his two sisters. Gren particularly enjoyed the texts when Corvus would describe designing the obstacle courses for his summer campers, who were set to start the second week of June, after public school was finished.

Corvus had even asked if they could video chat on Friday evening so he could show Gren pictures of his plans and ask for his opinion. While Gren had no idea what would make a good obstacle course, he readily agreed because he wanted to see Corvus’ face and hear his voice again. So, when Friday evening rolled around, he took a break from his parents, grabbed his laptop, laid on his belly in the guest bedroom he was staying in, and started a video chat through their personal emails.

It had been a week since Gren had last seen Corvus’ face, but it popping up on his screen made him instantly smile. Corvus looked comfortable. It also looked like his parents kept his room intact for whenever Corvus returned home because on the distant wall Gren could see a bookshelf with a shelf and a half filled with medals, awards and trophies, and it was easy enough to imagine Corvus earning those. The books that outnumbered and surrounded those awards, as well as a few figurines in display cases, felt like Corvus too. Because Corvus, who was always very practical, wouldn’t keep a bookshelf _just_ for awards, or books, but would use it in the most efficient manner possible to display all items of importance to him. Gren made a mental note try to ask Corvus about them later, even if it was only through text.

Corvus was instantly at ease with video chatting, which Gren supposed made sense - Corvus had always been more of a computer expert in general. He had explained once that his mom let him play with the family computer growing up and he was fearless in experimenting with it, like the thought that the computer could break never occurred to him. He also read his share of books from the library so he had a good amount of background knowledge of how they worked, and looked up keyboard shortcuts for new versions of operating systems, and that always made him feel more comfortable with the technology. It was sort of the opposite of his own experience with computers growing up, where Gren was only allowed to use the family computer for school assignments, and even then with the constant worrying from his mother that he would accidentally hit the wrong key, and the whole machine would somehow self-destruct. When he had saved enough money to buy a laptop of his own it was like a whole new experience of freedom...although he was still a little nervous about accidentally breaking it.

Within moments of starting the conversation Corvus started holding up his sketches - able to angle them so they showed up on the camera and with his face peeking a little behind to verify that he was pointing to the right spots. He walked Gren through his thought process for each course: explaining each level of difficulty, how the challenge level would increase, and which age group it would be appropriate for. Corvus, in general, seemed to try to keep a calm demeanor, but in talking through his ideas, his voice would become more animated in his excitement. Gren leaned forward, he loved seeing this side of Corvus; his enthusiasm was contagious and Gren found himself more invested in something he had never been interested in until this past week.

“Hey, thanks for listening through my ideas,” Corvus smiled, putting down his last sketch.

“I enjoyed hearing them. Are you the head designer for the camp?”

Corvus chuckled, “Well, technically, I’m a ‘Senior Counselor,’ but that’s because it’s my fifth year and I know what to expect. But as a ‘senior’ I’ve been delegated with designing the obstacle courses. I have a reputation for liking scavenger hunts and obstacle courses, and the people who run the program thought I should help design them this year.”

“That’s awesome! I’m glad they recognized your talent,” Gren smiled.

Corvus flustered a bit, “Yes, the boost in pay is nice too.”

“Win-win!” Gren cheered. “And of course they should be paying you more for all this designing work you’re doing. Do you have to set these up too?”

“Any employee that _doesn’t_ have school will all set these up during the upcoming week. So probably not Junior Counselors, since they are typically high schoolers, but regular CC, _err…_ Camp Counselors, and SC, like me, who _I guess_ count as supervisors?...will all pitch in.”

Gren smiled, “Nice!”

Corvus stifled a snicker, which took Gren by surprise.

“Sorry,” Corvus said, but was still grinning, “It’s just, your feet are swinging behind your head.”

Gren stopped and partially turned. Yup, his feet were raised in the air without him realizing it. He pointed his feet up and looked at the bottom of his socks...they looked okay, not particularly dirty or embarrassing. Gren honestly wasn’t sure what amused Corvus.

He looked back at Corvus, “I’m curious, what’s funny about that?”

He could tell Corvus was trying to hold back his grin. He bit his bottom lip to try to hide his smile and his voice sounded like he was making an effort to remove any tones of laughter, “It’s just the forced perspective of the camera, that’s all.”

Gren scrunched his eyebrows in confusion and tried to look for the little box that showed him his video.

“You had your feet pointed up and on both sides of your head, like extra large ears.” Corvus caved in and chuckled a little. “Between that and your smile, it was pretty cute,” he shrugged nonchalantly, and now brought a hand up to cover his grin.

Gren felt his cheeks heat up at the compliment, but was more determined to see what Corvus meant than to fully process it. He found his video box, pinned it so it was next to the box with Corvus’ video, and angled his feet until he could see what Corvus meant.

Sure enough, with his feet pointed up, and at the right spots behind him, the white socks did look like fake, extra large ears on the side of his head.

Corvus stifled another chuckle into his hand, and Gren looked at Corvus on his computer, wanting him to continue to laugh. Gren smiled playfully and wiggled his toes up and down, and as soon as Corvus noticed it he couldn’t keep it in and started bending over in laughter.

Gren stopped moving his toes, a small satisfied grin on his face, before he also broke down and started laughing with Corvus.

When the laughter died down, Corvus' face still had a trace of his small smirk but his eyes were beaming and Gren found himself melting in them. He unpinned his box so Corvus would take up the entire screen again.

“Impressive,” Corvus said lightly, “Y’know, I usually have a dry sense of humor, I can’t believe you got me with that.”

Gren beamed with pride, “I’m glad. I like the sound of your laugh.” 

His brain, about a meter behind Gren, processed what he had just said. _I’m wondering if I should’ve kept that one to myself…_ Gren thought, face feeling flushed for a different reason than earlier, as he looked at his keyboard.

“I like the sound of your laugh too, Gren,” Corvus replied, causing Gren to look back up at him.

Corvus’ eyes were warm and he had a small smile on his face that seemed to mirror his own. Gren tried his best to appreciate the moment, to remember Corvus’ expression and how much he cherished it.

“So, _umm…_ ” Corvus started.

“This was nice,” Gren interrupted - _that was probably a little rude,_ he mentally scolded himself, but it was likely that Corvus needed to leave, and Gren wanted to make sure Corvus knew how much he treasured seeing him.

“Yeah, I enjoyed this too…” Corvus grinned, and he looked off to the side, seemingly in thought. “Would you...maybe be interested…” he started slowly, as though thinking his idea through.

 _Yes!_ Gren’s brain instantly replied. He’d have to remember to be concerned about his eagerness later...

“...in video chatting, maybe, once a week?” Corvus finished, looking back at Gren. There was that _look_ again: _nervousness._ Only now Gren was more acutely aware of how nervous he also felt. His heart was beating wildly in his chest.

Gren smiled brightly, “That would be great!”

Corvus perked up, “Great! Great, I’m free on most weekends, except for when we’re camping.”

Gren thought about which day would work best with his schedule. “Would you mind Saturdays? I know Saturdays are a popular day to go out, and it doesn’t have to be in the evening, but it would be when I’m most comfortable taking a break from school because then I’ll have the buffer of Friday evening and all of Sunday to do school work.”

Corvus nodded, his eyes showing understanding, “Saturdays would be fine with me. There are a few cool new shows on Netflix we could watch if you’re interested?”

“That sounds nice! I’ve never watched Netflix with someone over video chat. It’ll be cool!” Gren said, his heart still beating with excitement.

Corvus grinned, “Yeah, there’s a few ways you can do it, split screen or have your computer open on the video chat and watch it on your T.V.…”

“You’re really good about using split screen. That wouldn’t have even occurred to me.”

Corvus blushed with pride, “I try to be efficient. It’s especially helpful when needing to compare two windows or for copying and pasting into different formats, making an online form from a scan and so on...I’m a little embarrassed to admit, but I’ve also used it to watch Netflix when working on school work. I don’t always have the best study habits...” Corvus said sheepishly.

 _Corvus looks so cute with that expression,_ Gren beamed before reminding himself to respond. He shrugged, “I think we all have those times. That’s why I usually book study rooms. When I’m away from my apartment, I’m away from the distractions that are in it, and can focus. When I’m home I do the same thing as you.”

Corvus raised an eyebrow, “ _Gren,_ master TA and overall super powered student, watching T.V. _while_ studying? Will wonders never cease?” he grinned with a wink.

Gren smiled cheekily, and was delighted his expression evoked another chuckle from Corvus.

“I should get going...” Corvus said after a pause, a small smirk still on his face.

“Yeah, me too...I still want to spend some time with my parents before heading back on Sunday. _Oh!_ Before I forget! I wanted to let you know that I’ll be spending most of tomorrow with my brother and his girlfriend. So I don’t think I’ll be texting much.”

Gren knew it was probably too much information, but he didn’t want Corvus to think he suddenly ghosted him if he didn’t reply back to his texts as quickly as he normally did.

“That makes sense. Drive back safely on Sunday.”

“Will do,” Gren was dragging this out, he was aware of that too, it’s just that...even a few extra seconds of time together felt _nice._ “I’ll text you when I get home and we can set up a time for Saturday at some point during the week,” Gren continued.

“I look forward to it,” a small grin, warm eyes, Gren felt his heart melting again.

“Me too...”

“Bye, Gren...”

“Bye, Corvus. Have a good night.”

“You too, Gren. ‘Night.”

“ ‘Night...” Then he hung up, slowly closed his laptop, tucked it under the bed, flopped back onto the guest bed, and let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

This was definitely new. Well, maybe it wasn’t “new” per se, but being aware of these feelings _and_ having time to unpack them was definitely new.

He took a deep breath, trying to slow down his rapid heart rate.

They weren’t bad feelings, in fact they were _really nice_ and left Gren feeling warm, hopeful even. He didn’t really know _the exact label_ to give these feelings, but he understood that Corvus was the person who caused them, and that they left him feeling better about life. Overall, Gren resolved to just enjoy the feelings as they came and to be prepared for the inevitable day when Corvus wouldn’t be able to hang out as much.

Gren felt his heart jump a bit. Okay, so thinking about when Corvus will become too busy for him did sting, but it was _likely_ to happen. Corvus was going into his sophomore year, which was widely known as the golden year for college students. It was the year many researchers would typically aim for when surveying college students, because they weren’t freshmen trying to get their bearings, nor were they juniors who were stressed out about finishing their degrees on time and they weren’t seniors who were “checked out” or otherwise “done” and getting ready to enter the workforce. 

So by all typical experiences, Corvus should have a great year.

...And Corvus said he was interested in dating men…So, it was only a matter of time before he would find someone of interest, or someone would show interest in him, and they would start dating, right? …And that person would not only treat Corvus well ( _because that was the minimum requirement_), but make him a priority ( _as he should_ ), and they would be _happy_ , and Gren would be happy _for_ them.

Because that’s how it worked, right? That’s how it was _supposed_ to work. 

Because that’s how it had always _been_ before, and it never bothered him up till now. He had always felt genuine happiness for his friends’ happiness. _...Wait, hold on, bother? Where did that come from?_

Would Corvus’ happiness with another guy _bother_ him? _That wasn’t right._ He felt like an awful person at just the thought of it. He just wanted Corvus to be happy! If another man could get Corvus to actually _show_ his beautiful smiles, instead of hiding them, then that’s all that really mattered. Gren really would feel genuinely happy for Corvus.

Gren felt his chest get tighter, and he sighed, before sitting up. _I’m not going to overthink this. Instead of thinking of what-ifs, I’m just going to enjoy each feeling as it comes, and take the rest in stride,_ he resolved to himself, before getting up to spend a little more time with his parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   * Thank you for reading.
>   * Whoever you are, stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. ❤️  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_  
>  \- Unknown
> 

> 
> * * *
> 
> **Chapter Doodle:**   
> 


	10. The 'Sister Test'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Fine, I give up. Let my sisters talk to my crush._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   * **_Some minor_ spoilers for the first 35 min of Enola Holmes**. I needed to use two characters' interactions as part of the story. I tried to be as vague as possible, but I would rather give you the spoiler warning _just in case._
>   * Lastly, all of Corvus' family members are OCs, but they're fun, so I hope you enjoy them. :)  
>  Corvus sisters are: Chlo (/k-low/) and Asha. (/ash-a/)
> 

> 
> * * *

**First week of July, Summer**

Corvus was trying to hide his smile as Gren watched the train scene from _Enola Holmes_. He had already watched this movie, several times, with both of his sisters individually and collectively as a family during Sunday movie night last week, but Gren hadn’t seen it and wanted to “study” for the escape room by watching some typical detective films and shows. Corvus didn’t mind; even though this was now his _fourth time_ seeing the movie, he honestly enjoyed it and he didn’t have to pay as close attention to it, opting instead to watch Gren’s adorable reactions in equal amounts to watching the actual film.

“Go back! Go back!” he heard Gren whisper at his laptop. Corvus smiled more; Gren was leaning in close to his screen, he was really into the movie.

A knock from his bedroom door withdrew his attention from the screen. “Hang on, Gren,” he said while pausing the movie - the “Netflix Party” extension pausing it on Gren’s side too.

“ _Cooorvus!_ ” he all but squeaked while moving his head back - trance broken. “It’s still the beginning of the movie, he’s not going to die, right?”

Corvus laughed, “I’m not telling you, you’ll have to watch!” he teased.

Gren laughed with him and it made Corvus smile more. “I would but _you’re_ the one who stopped it,” he teased back.

“Fair point,” he grinned, “Someone knocked on my door. Hold on.” He muted himself, lowered the laptop a little so the camera was pointing towards his desk, and opened his bedroom door to find his older sister standing there.

“What’s up, Chlo?” he asked, a mix between confusion and annoyance. He loved his sister, but he thought he told the family that he would be on a call and asked not to be interrupted unless it was an emergency.

“Hey, do you mind helping Asha find the flour? I don’t remember where dad put it…” 

_Not exactly an emergency, but fine,_ Corvus sighed, “Yeah, hold on…” He walked back to his computer, lifted up the screen, and unmuted himself. “Hey, Gren, I need to go help Asha with something. I’ll be right back,” he said.

“Take your time. I understand,” Gren gave him a cheeky grin and two thumbs up. Corvus felt the _thud_ in his chest as his heart rate increased - Gren was too cute for his own good. He smiled back, nodded, and exited his room, leaving the screen half-opened.

He walked down the long hallway and into the kitchen to find Asha frantically opening and closing cabinets. Was she even actually _looking_ in them or just going through the motion? Her cornrows were pulled back into a loose ponytail and she was wearing the apron she received from her birthday, in April. Other ingredients were scattered across the counter and Corvus recognized the paper, loosely fitted on the recipe stand, as one of the print outs from summer camp. He smiled at his sister, who was growing up way too fast, because instead of giving him one of the cute grins she would’ve in the past to butter him up, she instead returned with a frustrated scowl.

“ _Corvus,_ I’m trying to make the new brookie recipe from camp for family night tomorrow…” She turned away from him and continued looking through the cabinets, “and I can’t find the flour and that’s _kinda_ an important ingredient,” her frustration came out as whine and sass. 

And it was funny how she could, at once, be both thoughtful and borderline rude. Corvus shook his head, wondering if he was like this during his early teen years.

“Dad keeps any extra flour in an airtight container, at the top of the baking cabinet, to limit the amount of light exposure,” he explained, going to the cabinet and pulling it down from the top shelf. “Here, easy fix,” he grinned at his sister.

Asha took the container with a small, “Thanks,” and resumed her work laying out all of the ingredients and checking if she had the needed measuring cups.

Corvus nodded to himself, satisfied, and ready to go back to Gren.

“...But, why _wouldn’t_ Chlo know that?” Asha suddenly questioned aloud before turning to Corvus, all preteen sass gone and genuinely confused. “And it’s not like she wasn’t tall enough to reach it…” Her light brown eyes searched for possible solutions, looking at Corvus like he had the answer when it dawned on them both.

“ _Wait!_ ” they said at the same time, and panic swept through Corvus.

“You’re on a video call with your boyfriend, aren’t you?” Asha asked. For some reason, she sounded as offended as Corvus felt.

Corvus started booking it down the hall, “He’s not my boyfriend.”

“But you _like_ him!” Asha followed closely behind. “That’s _not fair!_ How come _Chlo_ gets to meet him and _I don’t…_ ” As much as Asha tried to hide it, he could hear the undercurrent of hurt in her voice.

He slowed down to a stop and turned to his little sister, “ _Erg,_ not like I _meant_ for her to meet him!” He made sure to catch her eyes, “I don’t want you guys to meet him because I don’t know where it’s going,” he whispered.

This only seemed to agitate her more, he could practically see her puff out her chest, “Well it’s _Going_ every Saturday,” Asha said in whispered irritation. “ _Come On!_ My room is next to yours! I can figure things out! When you guys talk at night it takes like _ten minutes_ for you to get off the call. I get tempted to go in there and just hang up for you! I’m going into my _teenage years,_ Corvus, national studies show that I need my sleep during this ‘critical time’ in my life.”

Corvus was a little taken aback, looking to the side and feeling the heat rise to his cheeks, “We don’t take ten minutes…” he mumbled.

“Do you _want_ me to start quoting?” She pointed her index finger and raised an eyebrow.

“No! No, point made.” He gave her the side eye, “And we’re both missing the _main point_.”

“Which is what? That you’re embarrassed of your little sister?” _Ouch, there_ was the source of the hurt. That made sense now...

“No! Never!” He paused for a moment, letting the words sink in, making sure to catch her eye so she knew he wasn’t joking. 

She was silent, but there was a small spark of recognition in her light brown orbs, enough to lead him to believe that she took his words as sincere and he could probably safely change the tone. 

Corvus rocked his head back and forth in exaggerated mock thought. “Well, except, maybe in public...But I’m pretty sure the feeling is mutual there,” he teased with a wink.

Asha half-smiled, “Jerk, but yeah…maybe a little true, maybe a little not...”

“ _Aww!_ ” Corvus smiled and they resumed walking to his room, together.

“Just don’t go shouting across the camp to say ‘hi’ to me though! That’s _so embarrassing!_ ”

“Deal. Now, let’s refocus, the real jerk is Chlo. I can’t believe she played us _both_.” 

Asha shrugged, “Well, it worked out for me, in a way. I’m going in right behind you. I at least want to know what he looks like.”

“Asha…”

“ _It was really nice seeing you Gren… Yeah, yeah, I hope you sleep well too…_” she started quoting in a dreamy voice, and Corvus felt his face turn hot again. He couldn’t bear to hear his own embarrassing love-struck words thrown back at him.

“You’re a stinker, but fine,” he grumbled, slightly impressed, and slightly scared, by the amount of game she already had at her age.

Asha grinned cheekily, “Show your enemies no weakness,” she quoted their mom now.

“So now we’re enemies?”

“Corvus, we’re siblings,” she stated matter-of-factly, “All siblings are born as frenemies,” she winked, and Corvus couldn’t find it in him to be mad at her.

“Fine. But _just looking,_ no conversation.”

“Agreed. We’ll work up to that.”

Corvus rolled his eyes, shook his head, and slowly opened the door. For as much big talk as she had in the hallway, Asha kept to her word and hid behind Corvus’ back as he entered the room; that way she could see him but not otherwise engage with Gren.

“...That’s really cool that you’ll be completely done in five years. I need to finish my bachelor’s degree then directly enroll into a doctorate program,” he heard Chlo’s voice.

He could see Gren at a slanted angle giving her his full attention. “Corvus mentioned that, but being a physical therapist is important. I’m sure you’re going to help a lot of people.”

“Thanks. I was inspired by Mom…” she smiled to herself before turning around to Corvus and Asha. “ _Ah,_ caught.” She grinned, looking at Corvus, not at all ashamed at being “caught”.

Corvus gave her a tight-lipped smile and took a deep breath. 

“ _Oh!_ Is that Asha?” He heard Gren from the other side of the computer.

Instead, Corvus tilted his head back and mentally groaned, _Fine, I give up. Let my sisters talk to my crush._

Asha came out from behind Corvus’ back, “Wait, you know my name?” She scooted Chlo over so they now shared the chair.

“Yeah. Corvus talks about you too. Baking camp, right? Then drawing comics and… art baking?”

“Creative Cakes!” Asha said excitedly and leaned closer to the screen, kicking Chlo off the chair in the process. “That’s cool of you to remember. Do you like baking?”

“I can make a mean set of cookies from boxed cake mix - adding chocolate M&Ms on top right before baking.”

“That sounds good! We did something similar in camp,” Asha continued to brighten.

“Awesome! From what I understand you’re an excellent baker, just like your dad. Corvus sends me pictures sometimes. Everything looks delicious, like your fingerprint cookies, they looked really cute too!”

“Yeah! Those were for our big ‘Enola Holmes’ movie night last week! I mean, they didn't have that technology back then, but I still figured it was detective-themed enough.”

Gren nodded with a smile, “I agree! Corvus sent me a picture before we started watching, they looked detective enough to me. It must’ve taken a lot of time to do all that really small piping considering you made them for your whole family.”

“Yeah, but I’ve gotten better at that. Dad says I just need to practice, ‘Careful repetition leads to peak performance’,” she tried to make her voice sound deeper when quoting their dad. “But it’s not as bad now, and I get to eat the ones I mess up on,” she beamed. “Plus, it helps that everyone kept saying how much they loved them when watching the movie!”

And Corvus could see the moment of realization hit Asha’s face, “ _Oh…_ Right, I guess we interrupted…Sorry ‘bout that…”

“ _Nah,_ it’s fine. I really enjoyed meeting you and your sister,” Gren waved it off with a grin.

Asha smiled again, and she fidgeted a little in the chair, “Thanks. I enjoyed meeting you too.”

“Did Corvus fix whatever you needed help with?” Gren asked, and Asha looked back confused.

“Did he find the flour?” Chlo clarified.

“ _Oh,_ yes, he did.” 

“Corvus seems like a good big brother,” Gren beamed.

Asha turned to face Corvus, a lopsided grin, “Yeah, he’s alright, for a brother.” She turned back to Gren, “But _you_ can take him if you want.” 

He was going to kill her. Yup, _so_ dead. 

“I’ll let you get back to talking with him. Enjoy the rest of the movie,” she got out of the chair nonchalantly.

Gren waved, “Thanks, bye Asha. Bye, Chlo - if you’re still there…” Gren wasn’t even fazed by the comment. Corvus let out a breath; he should’ve guessed...

“Bye!” Chlo shouted as she and Asha closed the door behind them.

Corvus returned to his chair and ran both hands down his cheeks, “Sorry, about the detour…”

Gren’s blue eyes darted down before returning to look at him, smile on his face, “Actually, it was really nice to meet them. You speak so highly of your family, it was nice to experience them first hand.”

A feeling of pride washed over Corvus, because even though he hadn’t meant for Gren to meet his sisters he was glad (and relieved) that they seemed to get along so far. “I think they enjoyed it too.” 

Just then his phone vibrated, a quick glance down: from Chlo. He’d wait until they restarted the movie; right now, talking to Gren was more important.

“Speaking of sisters... Just to give you fair warning, Embla’s visit is next weekend and she has been rather forward with me about how she doesn’t want to interrupt our Saturday call, and how she also wants to meet you.” His blue eyes now darted between looking at something past the bottom left corner of his screen and back at Corvus, “I-is that okay with you?” 

Gren’s voice was a little higher and faster than normal. And the stutter... _Aww!_ Gren must’ve been nervous. Corvus melted a little staring at him.

“Yeah! Yeah, of course! It would be great to meet her.” Besides the obvious public figures, like General Amaya, Embla was practically Gren’s hero growing up from what Corvus could tell. “I can ask her about the Navy.”

Gren groaned and gently rested his face on his desk, “I didn’t even _think_ about the Army versus Navy aspect.” He lifted his head back up, “ _Please_ don’t mention that Navy lost last year at the big game. There would be no recovering from that, and I _really_ want her to like you.”

Corvus grinned and leaned closer to his computer, raising an eyebrow and giving his best sultry smile. “Oh? You really want her to like me?” he teased.

Gren’s eyes grew wide and his face quickly turned two shades pinker, his freckles popping out a shade. ( _Totally worth it._ ) He let out a nervous laugh, looked away for a moment, scratched the back of his head, before tentatively ( _adorably_ ) looking back to Corvus. “Well, yeah. _I_ like you, so I want Embla to like you too,” he said softly, but also in a way that made it sound like this should’ve been obvious. 

It was Corvus’ turn to blush, “Yeah, no, I mean...y’know...that checks out…” Corvus flustered and looked away. When he returned back to the screen he could see Gren looking at him with a soft warmth in his eyes.

Since when was _Gren_ the one to be caught staring? He didn’t even seem to mind being caught.

“So, _uh,_ should we resume the movie?” Corvus asked, grasping for straws.

Gren seemed to snap out of _whatever that was_ and let out a quick, “Hold on!” His eyes shifted from one side to the next and Corvus could hear his mouse click. “Okay, split screen ready.” He said while making a small _‘klik-klik’_ sound and pointing to him with alternating index fingers while winking.

Corvus brought a hand up to hide a grin because Gren’s _ridiculousness_ was also _so precious_ and never failed to make him smile.

Gren seemed to catch this, and Corvus could see him take in a visible breath and let it out in a sigh, looking at him with _that warmth_ again and a calmer smile. Corvus feared he was going to completely melt under that gaze, and If he didn’t get this movie started soon they would spend the rest of the call just staring at each other like lovestruck fools. ( _Wait, that would imply that Gren was also lovestruck..?_ )

“Okay, starting it up…” Corvus gave warning before clicking the play button. He could hear the audio start on Gren’s side. His side was muted so there wasn’t an echo, but had the captions on. After a few minutes Corvus dared to glance down at his sister’s text, which had vibrated again after the first one.

“Asha and I convened and decided to give Gren tentative approval. Further interactions are needed if you actually start dating.”  
“Of which, go for it little brother!  What are you waiting for? An invitation? ” 

Corvus flustered.

“He’s obviously smitten,” Gren said in a sweet, dreamy, tone. 

Corvus looked up with wide eyes, _did Gren know?_ He tried to hide the panic in his voice, “Who?”

Gren paused the movie and looked at Corvus, “Tewkesbury. He already seems smitten with Enola. It’s sweet that he doesn’t want her to think that he’s an idiot - trying to show off with his knowledge of plants. He’s even cooking for her,” Gren’s tone radiated with ‘aww’. 

Corvus’ face still felt completely flushed, but Gren seemed none-the-wiser so his heart rate started to slowly calm down. “Yeah, yeah, I think you’re right. I think he’s smitten too.”

Gren nodded, now with a larger smile, “ _Ooo!_ That gives me hope that he’ll live.” He looked at Corvus, “Ready to resume?”

Corvus nodded and Gren started the film again. He watched as Tewkesbury interacted with Enola, and yes, it was obvious that he was besotted. That look he gave her as they parted reminded Corvus of the look Gren gave him the last time they saw each other in person, before the hug. Corvus glanced back at Gren, who seemed to be sad that the pair had separated. 

Did Gren see that pining look in Tewkesbury’s eyes too? Did it also remind him of their parting? One thing was certain: Tewkesbury aside, Corvus was definitely smitten and it was getting worse every day.

He glanced at Chlo’s text again, “...What are you waiting for? An invitation? ” No! Well, maybe just a little more time, because as sweet as it was watching someone else be infatuated, it was also a little unsettling to be the one experiencing it.

He glanced back to Gren, whose face was showing delightful surprise for the current scene, and it made Corvus smile.

And that was the thing, wasn’t it? The risk/reward factor. Because at the beginning of this whole thing the risk was, “I might not see my cute and nice KSL TA again”, and the reward was the possibility to get to see him _more_ and get to know him _more._ Towards the end of the fall semester the calculation was obvious: the potential payoff outweighed the risk. 

A month and a half ago he had at least figured out a plan to test the waters to see if _more_ was even possible. But then, the summer happened, he _just acted_ and that hug happened, they started texting everyday, and Gren...Gren was being even more friendly than before. Maybe flirty? Maybe just valuing their time together...and was Gren even aware of this himself? Was it Gren being _Gren,_ or Gren wanting _more?_ Because the closer Corvus allowed himself into thinking that Gren might be interested in him…No. No, rather, the closer Gren got, the higher the stakes, the higher the risk, and Corvus was more scared of how to proceed.

Risk: he might alienate, and potentially lose, someone he now considered a _close_ friend, someone he couldn’t go a week without seeing, a day without talking to, someone who inspired him and supported him. How could he lose someone that was already so dear to his heart, and for what? 

The _chance_ they could be something _even more?_ What would that even _look_ like? How would that be different than what they currently have? Kissing, maybe? Would Gren even want to? Would it be worth losing Gren just for a chance to kiss him? 

_No._

“Corvus, are you okay?” Gren’s voice cut through his thoughts. He didn’t even realize the movie was paused again. He looked up to see Gren looking at him with such concern it felt like his gaze stabbed Corvus in the heart.

“Yeah!” he tried to sound enthusiastic, but it came across as weak. “Yeah, just thinking is all.”

“Do you want to talk about it? Sometimes thinking aloud helps...” Gren gave him a weak smile, and his eyes were soft, trying to silently convenience Corvus to let him help.

Corvus felt his heart ache. He _liked_ Gren. He liked him _so, damn, much._

“No, no, I’m good.” He could see Gren frown a little, Corvus wasn’t doing a good job selling this. “Water break?” Corvus said with forced enthusiasm. “Then back to the movie?”

He could see the gears turn in Gren’s mind as he slowly leaned back and reluctantly nodded his head. “Sure,” he said softly.

“Awesome I’ll-”

“But, Corvus?” Gren interrupted, and there was something in his voice that caught his attention, something that sounded nervous.

“Yes?”

“I want you to know that, _umm…_ if you ever...if you ever change your mind...and need someone to talk to...I’m always here for you. No matter the subject, and no matter the hour.” He gave his best goofy smile, but Corvus could see a little bit of unease behind it.

Corvus sighed, he really didn’t want Gren to worry. So he smiled back, “I know, and same with you.” 

Gren nodded.

“And don’t worry about me. It’s nothing, _really_.”

Gren chuckled a little, which was uncharacteristic given the current mood, and caused Corvus to raise an eyebrow silently asking Gren to elaborate. Which he thankfully did, “It’s just a strange and funny request, isn’t it? To stop worrying about you? That would mean I would have to stop _caring_ about you and I couldn’t do that if I tried.” He smiled warmly, “Wouldn’t _want_ to do that.”

Corvus chuckled and shook his head. Of course, it was very _Gren_ of him and Corvus should’ve expected as much. “I guess you’re right. Thanks, Gren.” His heart pounded against his chest and yes, he definitely needed a breather. “Okay, water and restroom break. Be back in ten?”

“Sounds good,” Gren smiled warmly again.

Corvus nodded, muted himself, and turned off the camera, letting out a deep sigh as he dropped his arms to his side and tossed his head slowly back, stretching out his spine in the process.

Risk and reward.

Smitten and smiles.

What was he waiting for?

Time.

He really needed time to figure this out. Was this even _just_ a crush anymore? Was there such a thing as a crush+? He had the rest of summer. Hopefully, he’d figure it out before they returned in the fall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   * Thank you for reading. Encouraging comments are always appreciated. :)
>   * I _really enjoyed_ writing Corvus' sisters. Asha is twelve here and _two_ in my other fic. So while I particularly enjoyed writing her for multiple reasons, one was that I was able to explore a side of her that I will never be able to explore in my other fic. Hopefully, you guys enjoyed them too. I doubt they will pop up too much when Corvus and Gren are back in school.
>   * Stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. ❤️  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_  
>  \- Unknown
> 



	11. The Power of a Text Message

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His secret? His secret was that he received a text from Corvus and any day that happened it always made the day brighter and his heart race.
> 
> But how to explain that..?

**Last week of July, Summer Session C**

Soon enough, Gren was in the rhythm of summer: work, school, studying, cleaning the apartment, cooking (very basic meals), and _trying_ to stay in touch with friends and family. 

Since he started work early, he was on the road before city traffic had time to build up and he was able to get out of the city onto the wooded backroads quickly. In fact, his morning commute was only about twenty minutes total. In contrast, the afternoon commute was typically fifty minutes due to city traffic building up.

Thankfully, work was going well. Gren was currently working at one of the newer military bases located in a forested area just outside of the city, and he was quickly becoming reacquainted with all of the security protocols involved when working on a military base. First, he needed to drive through security to get onto the base, go to the building he was specifically working at, go through entrance security - where he needed to go through a metal detector and badge check, and then enter into the official building entrance - a large enclosed courtyard that held lockers along the perimeter and simultaneously served as the entry point to the food court, the attached employee gym, and access to the more secure areas of the building. Lastly, he needed to go through additional badge and device check before entering the secure, attached, building. 

The secured building of the military base had tinted windows along the perimeter, regular office hallways, but a lot of the spaces had no windows to the outside, at best a window into the hallway, if any at all. To keep up morale, the “public” areas, such as the courtyard entrance, tried to be cheery. It had vaulted ceilings several stories high with reinforced glass at the top to let in as much natural light as possible, there were even plants inside separating groups of tables - small trees and shrubs, as well as pathways to the other areas of interest like the locker storage and the employee gym entrance. It always felt like a breath of fresh air compared to some of the rooms he worked in. 

Lunch was a routine he was getting used to, too. Any device that emitted a GPS signal was not allowed in the areas he worked in and Gren needed to store his phone in his locker before entering the secure section of the base in the morning. Due to his locker being near the food court, Gren had a habit of checking his phone right before lunch began.

Since Gren’s work day started early it meant he would text Corvus first thing in the morning (probably before Corvus would wake up) with a well wish for the day, and lately (and he was proud of his phone skills for this one) attached an encouraging gif image or funny picture. Corvus, in turn, would text him back with a funny gif or picture and something about his day, and Gren would have the opportunity to read it at lunch. Even if the morning had been rough or rushed, a text from Corvus always put him in a good mood.

Over the past two weeks, however, Corvus had been out camping and had spotty reception. So while getting a text was rare, he checked all the same - just in case.

Gren opened his locker, turned on his phone, checked it, and was surprised to see a message waiting for him.

“I I get recep here. this goes through. is . Should b by Sat . Vid chat then?”

Gren grinned widely as he texted back, “It went through! :) Definitely up for video chatting on Saturday! :) I’m glad to hear camping is going well! Text when you get back on Saturday to let me know what time is best. If you need to rest, that’s understandable too,” he sent.

He turned off his phone, put it back in his locker and turned the dial to lock it. He returned to Amaya, who was towards the middle of the food court deciding what to eat. Now that his clearance level was higher, he found himself working with General Amaya more frequently, and more often than not, they were able to eat lunch together.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” Gren signed.

“You’re fine. I’m still deciding,” she signed with a smile.

After picking their meals, they met back up and found a spot to eat in a more private area of the food court. 

“You’re still extra smiley,” Amaya commented once they sat down for lunch. “I know it wasn’t from this morning.” 

That was true. Today had been his first time translating for Amaya in front of Representative Viren. The conversation revolved around the routine operations of the facility, but Viren was still rather… _unpleasant_. The current rumor was that the former _Lord_ Viren had stepped down from his position in the House of Gentry and took a position in the lower house as a representative so he could one day secure the Prime Minister position. Gren hoped that it stayed as a rumor, although he feared that was unlikely. 

Bringing himself back to Amaya’s statement, and back to Corvus’ text, Gren looked down at his food, pasta with a side of strawberries and spinach salad, and iced tea, he could feel his cheeks heat up. 

“I’m usually in a good mood for lunch,” he smiled to himself, and tried to focus on his lunch because he knew Amaya could read him well and he wasn’t sure if he was ready to answer any more questions, and if he couldn’t see her sign questions, then he didn’t have to answer them, right?

But Amaya was having no part of that; she tapped the back of his hand, forcing him to look up. “And any special reason why…?” she signed, “I would like to be in a good mood like that, what’s your secret?” She winked.

His secret? His secret was that he received a text from Corvus and any day that happened it always made the day brighter and his heart race. 

He felt his face grow even hotter as he took another bite of his food.

But how to explain that..?

When he looked up at Amaya again she was more tense than before; she removed her uniform glove, reached over and placed the back of her hand on his forehead. “Are you sick?” she signed after checking his forehead temperature, her eyes showed concern, and Gren couldn’t worry her further.

“Corvus,” He spelled out for emphasis, before returning to using their previously established initialization as a wiggled “C” close to his heart for Corvus’ name when signing. “We text every day. I get to read Corvus’ texts at the beginning of lunch,” he signed his explanation, still very much aware of his flushed face. “It puts me in a good mood.” He didn’t want to further explain that he hadn’t heard from Corvus much while camping due to poor reception so actually hearing from him _really_ made his day.

Amaya’s eyes widened a little and she seemed a little taken aback as she processed the information before a wide smile slowly started spreading across her face. _“Really?”_ she asked with a smirk and raised an eyebrow, “Please, elaborate.”

Gren laughed and looked at his plate, before looking back at his friend and mentor, “I don’t know if there is anything further to tell. I haven’t figured out a name for the feeling, I just know hearing from Corvus makes me happy. Like flutters in my stomach and a tightness in my chest.”

Amaya smiled fondly at Gren, “Sounds nice.”

Gren nodded, “It is! I figured I need to enjoy it while it lasts.”

She straightened up, “While it lasts?”

Gren finished his bite, put his fork down and signed, “I’m sure, someday, Corvus is going to start dating someone.”

Amaya continued looking at him, raising her eyebrows and casually waving her hand forward to gesture: _go on_.

“Well…I will want to support him in his relationship with whoever the lucky guy is,” Gren finished and looked at Amaya and gestured among the lines of: _isn’t that obvious?_

Amaya put a finger out towards him to give her a minute, he nodded and could see Amaya shove a bite of her chicken sandwich into her mouth as she thought about it.

“Why can’t _you_ be the lucky guy?” Amaya asked after finishing her bite and putting down her sandwich, “Am I missing something?”

Her question was genuine, and echoed the one his sister had asked him during a phone conversation earlier in the month. Gren had originally answered Embla’s question by explaining that he’d never been interested in anyone _before._ But his sister’s _“But are you interested in Corvus now?”_ was too on point and the thought lingered in the back of his head and distracted him from his school work, until he figured out the answer was a resounding: _yes._ (And that was terrifying for a different set of reasons he didn’t want to think about right now.)

Gren frowned slightly, “I don’t really think I have a reason why I can’t...Except that I'm a little scared...” he signed truthfully, a little embarrassed to admit it.

Amaya’s eyes turned softer and she nodded, “Understandable. In all the years we’ve known each other, I’ve never heard you talk about anyone this way prior.”

Gren blushed, “Nope, just Corvus,” he signed.

“I’m sure figuring that out wasn’t easy for you.”

“That’s accurate,” Gren agreed with a half-chuckle.

Amaya smiled before looking like she usually did when giving a motivational speech, “You’ve made it this far, Gren. Don’t count yourself out yet!” She gave a resolute nod.

Gren smiled and nodded back. “Thank you,” he signed.

He could tell Amaya wanted to ruffle his hair, her normal gesture of affection with him, but they were still at work and she held back, resolving to playfully punch his arm from across the table instead.

* * *

Gren returned home that evening completely exhausted. Viren’s visit meant he ended up working overtime on his normal duties. Then class was spent working mostly independently and in small conferences with his professor about what direction he wanted his senior project to go and how it needed to complement what would ultimately become his Master’s thesis. So now he had _that_ to think about…

Normally, Marcos left a small light on for him, but the apartment was empty, as Marcos had started his two week vacation to visit his family further west. So Gren flipped on the switch to the main room, ready to go straight to his room, flop into bed and sleep. What time was it anyways? 10:34? _Erg…_

Instead Gren dropped his school supplies near the dinner table, and went to the back of their apartment and onto the balcony. Looking over the city landscape, he was never more grateful that it was Thursday, thus ending classes for the week and leaving only one more day of work before Saturday.

“Got home safely. I hope this doesn’t wake you up and that you’re enjoying camping. :)” Gren instinctively texted Corvus.

He looked over his text from earlier: _Saturday!_ It’d be nice to see Corvus again. He was looking forward to hearing about camping, rock climbing, rapids riding, night walking and whatever else they did. Gren felt a little bad he couldn’t really remember all the events Corvus told him about, but it sounded busy. Gren looked out towards the stars, thinking back to what Janai said at their last breakfast.

 _Stargazing with Corvus would be nice,_ Gren thought to himself.

He started imagining taking a large blanket out towards the national park. There were some trails that went above the trees and probably had a nice view. Maybe they could bring a tent and camp, which would make Corvus happy, and Gren would be happy to see that. Lay on the blanket, under the stars after dinner but before bed time, drink some hot chocolate, cuddle up under another blanket in the cold autumn night…

Gren shook his head; cuddling with Corvus was something he caught himself dreaming about ever since their hug the last time they were on campus together. Actually, the more he replayed his memories from the past semester, the more obvious it became that he probably had strong feelings for Corvus for a while now, and was just too preoccupied with school, and stress...and the new-ness of the feelings, to really come to terms with it.

Gren sighed, the idea of cuddling together was a sweet daydream, but he didn’t know if Corvus was even interested in him like that…

Maybe it was because he was tired, or maybe because he really missed Corvus, but Gren looked at his previous message again, raised his phone’s camera, took a picture of the night sky and composed another text.

“You can barely see the stars over here. I wish I could be stargazing with you. PS: Still hoping this doesn’t wake you up.”

He read it through, he might as well be saying, _“I wish I could be with you,”_ \- accurate, but he wasn’t really sure if Corvus was going to catch that. Maybe this tipped his hand too much? Maybe Corvus would be able to tell that Gren had some big feelings for him by reading the subtext? 

But, right now, at 10:41 at night, Gren couldn’t find the energy to care about hiding his feelings. He sent the text, and got ready for bed.

Just as he finished brushing his teeth, putting on his pajamas, and turning off the light on his nightstand, a familiar text tone rang out with a picture of the starry night sky attached.

“Me 2 ”

 _Corvus!_ Gren thought happily. He wasn’t expecting to hear back from him. He lay in bed, the light from his phone being the only thing to illuminate his room.

“That’s a beautiful picture! Thank you for sending. I’m impressed you get reception. I didn’t wake you up with my text, did I? :\”

“Thxs, pic doesn’t do justice. It’s  here. Better signal 2nite. No, I was awake.”

Gren smiled from ear to ear; no way he could go to bed now. It was like he had been holding his breath under water up till this point, and the joy of talking to Corvus was like finally coming up for air.

“How was your day? How’s camp? It’s 10:53 what are you still doing up?”

“Lol! Look who’s talking!  Been busy. More dets on Sat. Hbu?”

“Long day. Seeing your texts helped make it better though, thanks. :)”

He could see Corvus type. Stop. Type again.

“Ur txts have that effect 2.  We both have wk tom. Ttyl. Sat @7 pm ok?”

“Saturday at 7 works for me. :) Rest well, Corvus.”

“U2, Gren. ”

Gren looked at the starry picture again and couldn’t stop smiling. Maybe, there was a chance they might actually go stargazing together someday after all. At least, Gren hoped so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   * Thank you for reading.
>   * Stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. ❤️  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_  
>  \- Unknown
> 
> * * *
> 
> 

> 
> **Chapter Doodles:**   
> 


	12. Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well, Ellis, I think you’re right.”
> 
> Ellis perked up, “Oh? About what?”
> 
> Corvus smiled, “I think love is a thing that’s hard to put into words.”
> 
> Ellis groaned, “I was afraid of that.”

**Last week of July, Camping**

Corvus sat on one the logs around the campfire, enjoying the quiet. Camp was going well and the kids were currently in their tents, “asleep”.

If Corvus closed his eyes, tuned out the sound of the crackling fire, and focused, he could hear their muffled giggles.

It was the second-to-last night of their camping trip. Tomorrow would be filled with exciting farewell activities such as ghost stories around the fireplace, s’mores, and songs; it would be fun, but no doubt draining. So tonight was probably the last night where he could enjoy the night sky in quiet and without the need to go to bed right away.

Looking up at the stars Corvus’ mind wandered to General Janai mentioning stargazing with General Amaya when they were in college. He wondered what Gren was doing and if he would be interested in camping and stargazing. Actually, it didn’t even have to be camping; even the thought of the two of them cuddling up on a blanket looking up at the night sky filled his heart with warmth.

As though just becoming aware of his own thought, Corvus shook his head. Probably best not to fantasize about stargazing dates, not until he knew how Gren felt about him. It was easy to let his crush get either the best or worst parts of his imagination.

A crunchy sound behind him made Corvus turn around.

“Ellis,” he smiled, “what are you doing up and about? Bathroom run?”

Ellis’ flashlight stayed on the ground as she approached, a light jacket on for the evening brisk which seemed to cover her husky dog pajamas.

“I just couldn’t take it anymore, Mr. Corvus, I needed some fresh air,” she said, exasperated, and sat down next to him on the log, not seeming to care if her PJ bottoms got dirty.

Corvus smiled, Ellis was only ten but very mature for her age. To an adult she had a wonderful way of looking at the world from unique and curious perspectives, but to her peers, she didn’t always “make sense”.

She huffed and cupped her cheeks in her hands, before changing her demeanor by sitting up and looking at Corvus. “I’m sorry, Mr. Corvus, were you taking a break too? I can take my break over there.” She pointed to the log across from him.

Corvus smiled, “Thanks, but I’m good.”

Ellis nodded, satisfied. 

“So do you want to talk about it or just relax?” Corvus offered. He had a particular soft spot for Ellis since this was his third year having her in camp.

Ellis sighed, “It’s hard to put into words.”

Corvus raised an eyebrow and nodded while looking towards the fire. “That’s fine. If you find the words, I’m happy to listen.”

From his peripheral vision he could see that Ellis was also looking at the fire.

“Why is the word ‘love’, like, a _bad_ thing now?”

He wasn’t expecting that.

“What do you mean?” he asked, looking at her.

“Like, I used to be able to say that I love a person and it was no big deal. Now if I say I love someone then other kids go _‘ooooo’_ like it’s suddenly a big deal,” she explained, still looking at the fire.

“I _think_ I’m following...”

Ellis sighed, “Like, I love my friend Ez, and I used to be able to say things like _‘I love Ez, he’s so great with animals’,_ but now the other kids are like, _‘Oooooooo , so you love him? Are you going to marry him?’_.” Ellis rolled her head to look at Corvus and slumped her shoulders, her body language practically oozing the sentiment, _see what type of ridiculousness I have to deal with._

She rolled her eyes again and shook her head, “And I’m like, _‘Yeah, I do love him, but the way you’re saying it, it’s like you’re trying to make me feel bad about it. And why does that mean marriage?’_ But then they’re just like, _‘That’s because you loooooove him.’_ and make kissy faces and I’m just so _done_ with it.” 

Okay, so he and the other camp counselors were definitely going to have a talk about tone and teasing. Last day of camping or not, this was _not_ going to fly on his watch.

“I mean, like love didn’t used to be a bad word. When we were little if I said _‘I love Ez, he’s so funny’_ other kids would say, _‘Cool, I think so too.’_ I just don’t get it. When did loving someone turn bad? Why does me loving Ez mean I want to marry him? I’m ten. I don’t even know if I want to get married! Let alone to who! Can’t I love people _without_ marrying them? Or is that only for people like my parents and Ava? Because I love them but no one is going to think I want to marry my dog.”

Yeah, Corvus forgot how tough being a kid was, especially when other people like to force relationship viewpoints on you.

“Well, Ellis, I think you’re right.”

Ellis perked up, “Oh? About what?”

Corvus smiled, “I think love is a thing that’s hard to put into words.”

Ellis groaned, “I was afraid of that.”

Corvus gave a small laugh, “ _Heh,_ I’ve been thinking about love a lot lately too. I think your peers are making a big deal about it because they heard their older siblings or another adult they know make a big deal about it, and they don’t quite know how to deal with it so they’re copying what they heard.”

Ellis sighed, “So, like, the worst game of telephone?”

Corvus chuckled, “Yeah, basically.” He looked towards the fireplace. “The thing is even adults, like me, struggle with it. I’ve been told since I was around your age that when you tell someone you love them it’s a really big deal, but the truth is, that’s kind of a lie because there’s different types of love. I think Moonshadow elves have words for like, twelve types of love? But don’t quote me on that. I think you feel some of them right away, depending on the type of love. I’m sure you told Ava that you loved her right after you rescued her, right?”

“Definitely! I **immediately** loved her.”

“In a perfect world we would all have love for each other and everyone in it. Maybe that’s how things should be phrased instead: that we _have_ love for someone or something.”

Ellis turned towards Corvus, “Okay, let’s try it.”

“Try it?”

“Yeah, like let’s see if it makes sense. So for example, I have **A LOT** of love for Ava. I also have a lot of love for my parents. Hey! It works so far.”

Corvus smiled, he loved Ellis’ enthusiasm.

“I have love for Ez, but it’s like a different _type_ of love.”

“That still checks out.”

Ellis smiled to herself, “Well, that phrasing is a cool way to think about it, but it’s not going to stop the other kids.”

Corvus nodded, “Yeah...I’ll talk to them first thing tomorrow.”

Ellis swung her feet, making a muted _thud_ sound as she hit the log with the back of her heels, “Thanks, I’m really not sure how much that’ll help. The kids at home are the same way. But the phrasing helps me to think about different types of love, so thanks for that.”

Corvus smiled softly, him and Ellis solving all the world’s problems.

His phone chimed a familiar tone, and Corvus felt his heart rate increase like a pavlovian response: _Gren._

“It’s okay if you get your phone, I don’t mind,” Ellis smiled. “I mean this is _your_ break too.”

Corvus nodded and smiled, pulling out his phone and checking it.

“Got home safely. I hope this doesn’t wake you up and that you’re enjoying camping. :)”

Corvus smiled at his phone.

“Do you have love for that person on your phone?” Ellis asked, smiling, “Oh, sorry, you don’t have to answer if it’s too personal.”

Corvus paused, “I do.” 

Although what type of love, Corvus still wasn’t completely sure.

Ellis seemed to be studying his face, “...Does that person have love for you too? Again, you don’t have to answer.”

No sooner did she ask that another message from Gren came in, this time a picture of the night sky.

“You can barely see the stars over here. I wish I could be stargazing with you. PS: Still hoping this doesn’t wake you up.”

Corvus thumbed over the message a few times with a small smile. It was very _Gren_ to worry about waking Corvus up with a text message.

“I think so, but not sure if it’s the same type as mine,” Corvus said, more to himself.

“ _Hmmm…_ Well, that sounds confusing!” 

Corvus half-chuckled, “It kinda is.”

“Well, hang in there Mr. Corvus!” Ellis hopped off the log, “I don’t hear the other kids anymore so I think I’ll head back to bed. Enjoy your break.”

“Thanks Ellis, and I’ll talk to the whole group tomorrow, not just the people in your tent.”

Ellis shrugged, “Thanks. Fingers crossed that it’ll help. G’night.”

Corvus watched to make sure Ellis made it back to her tent safely, returning to his phone once he saw her flashlight turn off.

He looked at the message, _stargazing, huh?_

Corvus held his phone adjacent to him and turned his camera on selfie mode, taking a picture of the stars directly above him.

Now what to say…

He reread part of the message, _“...I wish I could be stargazing with you…”_

Corvus’ heart beat increased. Did Gren even realize what he was implying? No, he took a deep breath, it was too late at night to be overthinking this. _Just take the text for what it says._

“Me 2 ” He typed. Corvus looked at the emoji, that wasn’t right…He needed a smiley face, but which one? 

He flipped through them:  
“?” - _Too generic._  
“?” - _No, too something… Toothy..?_  
“?” - _Definitely not,_ he blushed. _Way too much!_

“?” It was blushing. Would Gren think _he_ was blushing? _Erg,_ he felt like blushing at the thought. Was that too much? However, it seemed to convey a warmth that the other emoji versions of “ :) ” didn’t fully convey, and Gren’s text left him with a warm feeling in his heart...So it was fine. Again, too late at night to be overthinking this.

“Me 2 ” He sent, attaching the picture of the stars with his text.

Feet tapping on the ground, another text came in a few moments later, and Corvus let out the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding.

“That’s a beautiful picture! Thank you for sending. I’m impressed you get reception. I didn’t wake you up with my text, did I? :\”

Corvus smiled, “Thxs, pic doesn’t do justice. It’s  here. Better signal 2nite. No, I was awake.”

“How was your day? How’s camp? It’s 10:53 what are you still doing up?”

Corvus stifled a laugh, _Gren_ was trying to tease _him_ about staying up too late?

“Lol! Look who’s talking!  Been busy. More dets on Sat. Hbu?”

“Long day. Seeing your texts helped make it better though, thanks. :)”

Corvus had to reread the text. His heart pounded in his chest, and he felt his cheeks heating up. This was the second time this evening he was hinting that… _No,_ this was Gren. He was probably being friendly.

“I’m glad they helped.” He typed, but hesitated. It was true, it was _friendly,_ but… _What if_ Gren’s feelings were more similar to his own? If he had told Gren _‘seeing your texts helped made the day better’_ and Gren replied with _‘I’m glad they helped.’_ Corvus would definitely take it as being a nice friend - not a potential romantic interest.

He deleted the text. But what to send? _Erg,_ didn’t he already resolve that it was too late at night to be overthinking this? Then he’d be honest. If it was too much he’d blame the lack of sleep.

“Ur txts have that effect 2. ” he typed. It was true, but he needed to add something less mushy, “We both have wk tom. Ttyl. Sat @19” _woops,_ Gren - civilian time, “7 pm ok?” He sent the text and his heart raced, not really sure what to expect.

His phone chimed.

“Saturday at 7 works for me. :) Rest well, Corvus.”

Corvus smiled, “U2, Gren. ” he texted back.

He got up and put out what was left of the fire, making sure to mix the ashes and embers with soil, checked that there were no hot embers on the logs, and that everything was wet.

Corvus looked up; so Gren was thinking of stargazing too… Between the texts and video chats Corvus was starting to have more hope that Gren _might_ be interested in him after all.

He looked at Gren’s text again. _Long day, huh?_ He frowned, then typed a new message, a very Gren-like message:

“Hope today is better. Happy Friday! PS: I hope ur still  rn & this doesn’t wake u”

 _I hope that makes his morning tomorrow,_ Corvus thought to himself with a grin while walking toward his tent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since moon magic is associated with “love” I figured Moonshadow elves would be more like the Ancient Greeks philosophers and have different words for the different types of love. I counted twelve types of love by taking the five identified from those Greek philosophers and added the seven other varieties from modern authors.
> 
> * * *
> 
>   * Thank you for reading.
>   * Stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. ❤️  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_  
>  \- Unknown
> 
> * * *
> 
> 

> 
> **Chapter Doodles:**   
> 


	13. Anticipation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Truthfully, he had been planning this for over a week, pretty much ever since Corvus mentioned inviting him to his new apartment.

**Second week of August, Before the Fall Semester Begins**

Corvus returned home from his morning run with energy to spare. When he had first left at six am the weather was pleasant for an August morning, and given the hour most of the campus was still quiet. He saw a few other ROTC cadets running and waved when they were nearby, but for the most part it was nice to clear his head. 

After checking his heart rate on his watch, Corvus decided to extend his cool down by walking another lap around his apartment building.

Today was the big day.

Well, it wasn't _really_ a big day, but his nerves would do their best to convince him otherwise. Gren was visiting their dormitory apartment today and it would be his first time seeing Gren in person since the beginning of summer. And...well...it _felt_ like a lot of things had changed over the summer. For one thing, they now texted on a daily basis, which reminded Corvus…

“Gm  Finished my .”  
“day. Hope u enjoy it2.” 

“Looking 4ward 2cing u l8r.”  
“Looking forward to seeing you later?” Corvus said to himself, stopping before hitting send. Well, it was true but… He sighed, he was starting to believe that he wasn’t good at finding the balance of showing his excitement and protecting his feelings.

Maybe, “C u soon! ” instead? But it was this afternoon, not _that_ soon.  
Maybe, “C u l8r today! ” Almost! Somehow the exclamation mark was too much and the thumbs up not enough...  
“C u l8r today ” - no exclamation mark, keeping it cool there, but the emoji conveyed warmth. Yup! It had a nice combination of showing excitement without it being _too much._

Within ten steps Corvus’ phone rang out two high notes followed by a low chord, he pulled it back out in bewilderment. In the summer Gren was typically awake before him but, now that his summer internship was over, Gren typically “slept in” until eight o’clock. Corvus wasn’t expecting a response so early.

“I’m looking forward to seeing you! ”  
“And your place!”  
“And Kazi and Sabah!” The texts came in quick succession, which was unusual for Gren who was inclined to write one long text instead of several short ones. Maybe Corvus had woken him up and he wasn’t thinking clearly?

Wait…Corvus had to do a double take. “Is that an emoji I c from u - Gren? ”

“I’ve gotten better! I used gifs this summer, remember? >:D”

“C! Missed op there! ” 

“Oh! Well...I’m still getting used to them, old habits are hard to break. But  seemed appropriate for describing seeing you.”

Corvus smiled at his phone as he entered his apartment building, his accelerated heart beat no longer from his run. “Same 4u ”

“”

Corvus grinned at the message. The expression from the emoji not only suited Gren, but it was also very easy to imagine Gren making that face. During their weekly video calls Corvus had the pleasure of seeing Gren make that adorable warm happy face often, at times even with the blush. Which brought him back to his original train of thought - it _definitely_ felt like a lot of things had changed over the summer, and he was just wondering how it would translate when they saw each other in person.

He jogged up the stairs - his apartment being on the second floor made taking the stairs over the elevator an easy choice - went down the hall and unlocked the door to his apartment. Unsurprisingly, Kazi was awake and sitting on one of the stools at the breakfast bar, eating a bowl of cereal in between reading pages of their book.

They stopped and perked up when they saw Corvus enter, “Good morning. Did you have a good run?”

Corvus was still smiling from earlier, “Yes, good to clear my head.” He started untying his shoe laces.

Kazi paused from their book and placed a bookmark inside before closing it - Kazi _did not_ believe in ‘dog-earing perfectly good book pages’ - “Good. So, _how are you_ feeling about Gren coming over? You’re not as…wound up?...as you were last semester. Which is good!”

Corvus stood back up, putting his running shoes on the rack, and took a deep breath, “I am a little nervous, but also a little excited. I’ve been going over it in my head since I invited him. I’ve been brainstorming ideas of how I can be closer to him but allow him an exit if it’s unwanted. Like, giving him a tour around the apartment gives me an excuse for us to hold hands. I figured I can _loosely_ take his hand, but have it so loose that if it’s not reciprocated I’ll let go by the time I reach the first door - that way he’s not uncomfortable. But if he _wants_ to hold hands then he has an opportunity to y’know…hold it back.” 

“Aww, that’s sweet. I wish I could say I’m surprised by you making plans to make a move, but I’m not. What are your other hopes, I mean, plans?” Kazi teased with an amused grin, leaning forward on the bar and folding their hands under their chin.

Corvus chuckled and gave a sidewards glance to his roommate, “That’s about as far as I’ve gotten on the physical touch part, but that’s about as much as I think I can handle.”

Kazi straightened their back and laughed along, “Well, I’m glad you have a strategy.”

Corvus smiled shyly and scratched the back of his neck, “Well, I didn’t the last time we saw each other in person and you know how much I was kicking myself for it...I want to be prepared.”

Kazi took a bite of their cereal before asking, “So are you going to hug him? Maybe as a greeting?”

Corvus felt his cheeks heat up, “I wasn’t _planning_ on it, but I have given it some thought to potentially doing so as a parting. I figured...if the situation comes up...I’ll mimic Sabah and open my arms out, kinda like you suggested. If he doesn’t want one I can always try to play it off and put my hands in my pockets.”

“ _Hmm,_ it’s good you’re thinking of all angles,” Kazi smiled. “As I mentioned earlier, it’s nice to see you so calm about this.”

“ _Heh,_ I don’t know if ‘calm’ is the word. I do feel jittery, but...it’s a nice type of jitter,” Corvus smiled. “And I’ve been channeling my inner Kazi and trying to look strictly at events and actions,” he winked.

Kazi blushed and returned to their cereal bowl, “Oh?” 

“Gren texted me everyday in the summer, multiple times, like entire conversations, and we would video chat for hours each Saturday.” _So much so that my sisters thought we were dating,_ Corvus finished in his head, but was too embarrassed to say it aloud. “I’m not going to make the leap that he feels the same about me, but…” Corvus shrugged, “I don’t know...I shouldn’t rule that out. At the very least, I feel like he really values our friendship, and that’s… _nice_.”

“Who values what friendship?” Sabah came out of her room with a big yawn, still in her PJs - PJ bottoms with glowtoads of various colors/moods printed on them and an oversized printed shirt with the words, “Not A Morning Person” surrounding a large yellow grumpy glowtoad.

Kazi grinned wider as they turned around, “What are you doing up so early? Aren’t you a ‘night owl’, as the Katolis phrase goes?”

Sabah waved the comment off with her hand and slowly went to the cabinet for a bowl. “I’m trying to be supportive - big day, right?” She stopped midwalk and backtracked to the coffee machine - Corvus had started it before leaving for his morning run, “Did I mention that while I love you both, and think you’re both wonderful roommates, I am _especially_ grateful to whoever started this.”

Both laughed, and Kazi tilted their head towards Corvus who bowed his head in acknowledgment to the thanks. 

“I guess it pays to have two early birds for roommates,” he joked.

“Well _I_ certainly _value our friendship,_ ” she yawned again while pouring a cup. “But, seriously, what did I miss?” she smiled.

Corvus and Kazi shared a glance and Kazi nodded. “I’ll catch her up,” they consented.

“Thanks,” Corvus nodded and looked towards Sabah. “Sorry, Sabah, but I really need a shower.”

“Go shower, I can smell you from here,” she grinned with a playful twinkle in her eyes.

Corvus smiled back, “Hey, when I get out, can I go over the other stuff I was hoping to do when Gren was here? Potential board games, or video games that might be fun to play as a group?”

“Of course.” - “Always up for games!” the pair answered at the same time.

Corvus nodded his thanks, grin still wide on his face, and turned around towards the shower, going over the day in his head.

He felt good from his workout, and he had already picked out and pressed the clothes he was going to wear (something fresh that would boost his confidence). Once Gren arrived he figured they could order pizza for dinner, and afterwards they could play games. Given Sabah’s competitive nature...and his own, he was thinking _cooperative games_ for everyone’s first time meeting each other. He’d bounce that idea off Kazi and Sabah when he got out of the shower. _Everything will go well,_ he thought to himself; he would allow himself to hope for that much.

* * *

Gren had the veggies on the counter, cutting board and measuring cups ready, the tomato sauce on standby on the counter near the fridge and a pot of room temperature water on the stove. He turned the stove on “high”, and took a deep breath - everything looked intimidating. 

_Nope, turn that frown upside down! I can do this,_ Gren tried to give himself a mental pep talk as he grabbed another pot from the cabinet. 

Marcos sat on the other side of the small breakfast bar between the kitchen and living room. “So...You’re making dinner?” he asked slowly.

“Yup!” Gren replied, as he started measuring out and pouring the sauce into a smaller pot on the stove.

“It’s nine in the morning…” Marcos continued wearily, and Gren could feel his eyes follow him as he moved around the kitchen, along with a question lingering in the air.

“I’m going to visit Corvus at his apartment today,” he explained, hearing his voice waver slightly, but at least he wasn’t stuttering. “When people move in, it’s polite to bring a dish, so I figured I would bring lasagna.” He searched through the cabinets and took out a glass baking dish, set it on the counter and pulled out a matching baking dish, a dilemma already forming in his head. He turned to Marcos, “Do you think I should bring the lasagna over in one of _our_ dishes, or should I have bought one of those disposable ones?”

“You’re going to see Corvus in the future, right?”

“Of course!” Gren replied without hesitation, “We already started comparing schedules to figure out when to book the study rooms, plus there’s the escape room so...yeah. Definitely.” He felt his chest tighten.

“Then glass should be fine.”

Gren nodded and set the two dishes out on the counter. He was running out of room… Maybe he should get some of the vegetables cut? That might help clear some space. He grabbed one of the carrots, sharpened the knife and started chopping it on the cutting board.

“Y’know, if he’s uncomfortable returning the glass during one of your study sessions on campus, he can always come over and return it to our apartment directly,” Marcos said casually.

And Gren almost lost his grip at the distracting thought. It wasn’t a new thought; he had suggested that Corvus could visit their apartment at the beginning of summer, and he seemed receptive to it, and it wasn’t _actually_ a big deal, because friends visit each other all the time! But Gren was making it into a bigger deal in his head. Maybe because it was less like they were meeting on the neutral ground of campus and more like they were actually entering each other’s worlds.

“Th-that would be nice…” Gren put down the knife and went to the nearly boiling water, he wasn’t quite ready for the noodles yet so he turned it down a little bit.

“Gren, this looks like a lot of ingredients for lasagna,” Marcos continued. 

Gren went back to the cutting board, facing Marcos again, “Well, I’m making _us_ some lasagna too. I figured that it was easier to make both at the same time,” he said. “But I didn’t take ingredient management into account,” Gren chuckled, and returned back to chopping the carrot.

Marcos raised an eyebrow and nodded his head.

“Ours will be beef lasagna, but I think one of Corvus’ roommates is a vegetarian, so I looked up a vegetarian recipe and am trying that for their dish. But then I was going to make a side of ground beef for Corvus, because I know that he eats meat, and maybe his other roommate does too? I figured it wouldn't hurt. I mean, they can add it into their lasagna if they want…But then I figured, I should bring a side, y’know, so they can have _a full meal._ So I also bought some garlic bread to pair with the lasagna, but then I figured that was a lot of carbs. So I thought, why not also bring some baby spinach, strawberries, pecans and balsamic vinegar for a side salad? Because _who doesn’t_ love strawberry and spinach salad? And I was going to make that jello dish my mom made growing up. Y’know, the one with the clementines and peeled carrots, because it’s sweet, but also sort-of healthy,” Gren rambled off, his voice picking up speed as he talked.

In his peripheral vision Gren could see Marcos nod his head, “You’ve given this a lot of thought.”

Gren paused for a moment and nodded, “Yeah, I guess I have.” Truthfully, he had been planning this for over a week, pretty much ever since Corvus mentioned inviting him to his new apartment. He looked up recipes online and called his mom to ask for some of hers. It was important to have all the ingredients when he went shopping and he just really wanted this to go well...

“Scoot over, I’ll do the chopping,” Marcos said, getting up and suddenly at the sink washing his hands seemingly in the blink of an eye.

_“Huh?”_

Marcos let out a small chuckle. “I can tell this is important to you,” he said while wiping his hands with a towel, “I’ll be your sous-chef. Focus on the pasta and I’ll cut the veggies.” 

Gren felt his heart go light, “Thanks, Marcos. You’re the best.”

He nodded and continued chopping the carrot Gren started, “Yup. How many do you need chopped?”

“Three carrots, the red bell pepper, the zucchini, and the yellow onion for now.”

“Got it. Do they need to be separate or can I throw them in the same bowl?”

“Uh, let me double check…Yup, they need to be cooked over the stove first so the same bowl is fine.”

Marcos stayed focused on cutting but nodded in acknowledgement.

“Go team!” Gren cheered, feeling a new rush of energy.

“Go team,” Marcos said with a small smirk. 

Gren smiled and turned the water to medium-high, then carefully counted out the number of lasagna noodles needed to make two dishes. Putting all his previous feelings aside, this felt manageable again. Between him and Marcos, they had this.


	14. Butterflies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Within two strides Gren reached Corvus, wrapped his arms around him, felt Corvus wrap his arms over him, and it was just what he needed.

Standing outside Corvus' new dormitory apartment, an insulated grocery bag in one hand keeping the hot dishes warm, and another one under his arm for the cooler dishes, Gren had never been so nervous as he was at this moment. Somehow his security clearance interview paled in comparison, even dealing with Rep. Viren paled in comparison to the butterflies he was currently feeling.

 _Don't be nervous. Don't be nervous,_ he repeated to himself; he felt frozen in his spot. _It's just Corvus!_ He tried to reassure himself.

But, it _wasn't_ just Corvus. Most likely it was Kazi and Sabah too, and Gren wanted to make a good first impression on them. He even dressed up a little nicer than usual, a nice solid t-shirt with an opened short sleeve button up over it. It was a step down from "breakfast casual" but still nice, _hopefully._

The sound of a bugle horn erupted from Gren's phone and, more than Gren cared to admit, getting a text from Marcos was a welcome distraction right now to help calm his anxiety.

“Our lasagna tastes great. The one for Corvus and his roommates probably came out well too. Relax. ”

Gren nodded, _Relax. Got it._

Second floor, Apartment 2-149. Gren took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

A pause. Then some sound from the other end. Gren felt his chest tighten, heart racing fast. Footsteps coming closer. Gren took in a deep breath, _relax, you got this._ Then the door opened.

"Corvus," Gren breathed out, a smile instantly spreading across his face. And how was it that the sight of his friend made him feel both instantly better and a different type of tightness in his chest?

Corvus was definitely dressed in "breakfast casual" clothes, a nice button up and dark jeans. He looked so _dashing_ and _handsome_ and...and Gren needed to _stop staring_ _…_

"Gren!" he smiled as he opened the door a little wider, "Glad you found it. _Oh!_ You brought something? Here, let me help…" He took the bag Gren was holding, and Gren was very much aware of Corvus' hand brushing against his as he took the bag with the lasagna...and why was his brain even noting that?

Corvus might've noted it too? He quickly looked from Gren's hand, to his face, back to the bag - now in his own hands, before returning to Gren's face, then looking away. If Gren wasn't hyper aware of Corvus in the moment, he might've missed that.

"Come on in," Corvus smiled, quickly turning around and back into the apartment to cover it, but Gren saw enough to make his cheeks turn warm and cause a lazy smile to spread across his face. _Corvus has the nicest smile._

"Th-thanks for having me," Gren said and stepped in, immediately greeted by the sight of their living room and the open kitchen to the left. "Wow, nice place!"

Corvus looked back at Gren, a huge smile of pride on his face, "Thanks! We like it too," he beamed as he set the bag on the long breakfast bar that separated the kitchen from the living room. Gren automatically followed suit, placing the insulated bag under his arm on the breakfast bar next to Corvus as he continued to look around. It was definitely longer in layout than his own apartment, but thinner in width. There seemed to be a room and a small hallway further on the left, and on the right a longer hallway with at least one visible door. Gren's heart beat faster, the door reminding him of Kazi and Sabah. Were they here now? Was Gren going to meet them _now_ _?_ Did he look presentable? His gaze found his way back to the front door and a small shoe rack beside it.

" _Oh!_ I'm sorry! I didn't realize about the shoes! I'll take them off now!" Gren panicked and all but hopped his way back to the front, neatly untied his shoes, and placed them on the rack. It was then he noticed: only one pair of shoes were on the rack with his...Corvus' shoes?

 _Wait,_ wasn't he going to meet Kazi and Sabah? Did they _not_ want to meet him? What did it mean if they didn't want to meet him? _Gosh,_ the escape room was going to be awkward if they didn't want to meet him… Was his brain making this meeting a bigger deal than it really was? Were these those "automatic negative thoughts" Marcos told him about over dinner the other night? Was it really _just_ him and Corvus? Were they _just_ hanging out? And why was Corvus dressed so nicely? Did he have a date earlier? Or did he dress nicely for him? Why were both of those thoughts equally nerve-racking? What did _that_ mean? Was this panicking? This felt like panicking…Why was he panicking?

His hyperfocus seemed to dissolve at the sound of Corvus' light chuckle. Gren broke his gaze from his shoes, quickly stood up straight, and looked at Corvus. Corvus' hazel eyes were warm and soft but quickly changed, "You okay, Gren?" his voice now concerned.

Gren tried, but he couldn't force a smile, his heart was beating fast, his stomach twisted, he felt wound up, "I-I think I just need a redo…"

Corvus' demeanor became less stiff, he shuffled from one side to the other, and he seemed to look at Gren from head to toe, like he was assessing the situation and Gren's body language.

"We can try again, if you want," he said as he bit his lip slightly and looked from the ground then back at Gren. He spread out his arms a little and Gren quickly recognized the gesture, it was the _"do you want a hug"_ gesture. He did that with Marcos when Marcos seemed stressed. (Marcos, however, _very rarely_ took him up on the offer. He's not much of a hugger.)

Within two strides Gren reached Corvus, wrapped his arms around him, felt Corvus wrap his arms over him, and it was just what he needed.

He took in a deep breath, resting his chin on Corvus' shoulder. Corvus' body was warm, but the fabric of his shirt felt cool, and soft. This was _nice._ Then, of course, there was the temptation of the crook of Corvus' neck, which really looked like a comforting little nook that Gren could bury his face in and be completely safe and secluded from the rest of the world, but instead he let himself stay a little longer on his shoulder, taking in another breath. Corvus smelled like sunlight and fresh air - like his clothes were hung outside to dry and soaked in all of nature. It was comforting, and Gren felt grounded again, safe.

He lifted his head up and gently bonked his head against the side of Corvus'.

He could hear the small, _heh_ after the bonk before Corvus softly asked, "Better?"

Gren felt a shiver run down his spine, Corvus was so close to his ear he could feel his breath when he spoke. "Yes, thank you," Gren smiled, and even though Corvus couldn't see it, he hoped his tone conveyed it. He felt Corvus loosen his grip, start to pull back, but Gren tightened his arms quickly then loosened them. If Corvus wanted to end the hug, he wouldn't stop him, but Gren hoped Corvus understood his hint that he wanted to hug a little longer.

A slight hesitation, before Corvus resumed the hug, pulling him in a smidgen more, and even gently bonking him back.

Gren smiled to himself. _Corvus is…_ Amazing? Wonderful? Fantastic? Super supportive? Thoughtful? The Best? _All of those,_ he mentally noted, his heart now beating fast in the pleasant way it usually did around Corvus instead of out of anxiety like earlier.

"I'm really nervous about meeting Kazi and Sabah," Gren admitted, and this was one of the nice things about hugging, besides the feeling of warmth and safety; he didn't have to see Corvus' reaction to his embarrassing news.

He felt the slight tilt of Corvus' head, "Why would you…? You have nothing to…" he couldn't get the sentences out. He just sounded completely baffled.

"They're both really important people in your life. I'm just...worried that I won't leave a good impression…"

There was a small silence, "Is that why you brought two bags of, what I imagine to be, food?"

Gren nodded, "Well, that and you guys are have just _recently moved in_ and it's only polite to bring dinner to people who have just-"

Corvus chuckled, and he could hear a small "of course" escape his lips, although that seemed mostly to himself. Gren didn't finish the rest of his explanation because it suddenly didn't seem to matter. It had already, unintentionally, accomplished the highest success possible in this situation - it made Corvus laugh.

"Gren, there's nothing for you to worry about, I promise." Corvus pulled back enough so they could face each other, his hands now moving to Gren's shoulders. Gren tried to look away, still flushed in the face with now a mixture of embarrassment and pride, but Corvus maneuvered his head and made a point to catch Gren's eyes. Corvus' eyes, soft hazel and warm, seemed to convey so much before he even spoke a word. "They're going to love you, I know it," he smiled.

Gren's chest tightened and he couldn't help but to smile back, "Th-thank you for the vote of confidence," he said while looking away.

Corvus let out another breath and, with widening eyes, Gren became very much aware that they were in each other's CO2 zones again. He returned back to Corvus' eyes, but they were hooded by long eyelashes; Corvus' gaze seemed to be a little lower, but then he looked up, hazel met blue, and it was like looking at Gren snapped him out of… _something_ because Corvus' eyes widened and his face quickly pulled back. Gren didn't even realize it was that close to begin with...

"Well," Corvus said while patting Gren's shoulders twice, then letting go and walking towards the bags, "let's see what you brought!"

Gren stood frozen for a second, his heart beating so rapidly he could practically feel it in his ears. _What was_ _that_ _?_

The sound of the insulated grocery bag unzipping reminded him of where he was, where Corvus was and, putting whatever _that_ was aside, wherever Corvus was that's where he wanted to be.

Gren made a mental note to try to break down and process _that_ later, and practically skipped to Corvus' side. Odd. He was feeling a little light on his feet now. Maybe that was part of the Corvus effect, or at least that's what he started to mentally call it after speaking with General Amaya about it over the summer.

"I can't believe you," Corvus laughed as he pulled out the smaller container of cooked ground beef, both halves of the garlic bread already set on the counter. "This is a full fledged meal!" His voice still sounded in disbelief.

"Careful, it's still hot," Gren warned as Corvus pulled out the glass container with the lasagna.

"And you taped a paper with the ingredients to the lid..." Corvus half-laughed, somewhat baffled.

"For allergies - just in case," Gren smiled and opened the bag with the cooler items as Corvus carefully set the glass dish on the counter behind them, and further away from an edge.

Corvus turned back around after placing a potholder under the dish. "I forgot there was a second bag..."

Gren turned around and somehow Corvus seemed to be _right_ next to him, back in his breathing space, and looking beside him to see what else was in the bag. Gren smiled to himself further, it reminded him of when Corvus was looking over at his laptop screen, back in the fall, back when he asked for his phone number…things sure have changed since then. Or was Corvus always like this and Gren didn't really notice until now?

"Well?" Corvus' voice was excited.

Gren chuckled, pulled out the container of jello, and gave it to Corvus.

He looked at the short ingredients list, "Carrots?"

Gren laughed more, "They're the thin shavings you see. It's my mom's recipe. Askur was always a picky eater, so she had to sneak veggies in our meals in "creative" ways for him to eat it. The jello and clementine slices actually make it very sweet, you don't even taste the carrots. I figured an extra dose of veggies never hurt, plus then you get to try one of my mom's dishes." Gren blushed, he didn't realize how excited he was for Corvus to try a little taste of something he frequently ate growing up.

"Nice." Corvus' voice sounded soft and Gren could hear him open the refrigerator to put the jello away.

"There's still more," Gren said, now pulling out the container of cut strawberries, setting that on the counter, followed by the balsamic vinegar, and the pecans - also in a separate container in case of any tree nut allergies.

"More?" Corvus asked beside him, and from his tone Gren could tell Corvus was getting close to teasing him about the volume of food he brought. In his peripheral vision, he could see Corvus leaning against the counter with a wide grin on his face.

"I wanted to make sure the three of you had a balanced meal, and ideally leftovers to enjoy." Gren felt his face grow hotter under Corvus' gaze. He pulled out the last item. "Lastly, a bowl of baby spinach for the salad. Along with the strawberries, pecans and dressing, of course."

Corvus took the bowl from Gren. "Of course," he echoed, his voice still sounding playful. Corvus looked from the bowl, back to Gren, back to the bowl and bit his lip, "So do you _always_ do _this much_ cooking when someone moves into a new place?"

"Nope, just you." Gren said automatically. Wait..! "And-and Kazi and Sabah, of course! All of you! _Uh,_ I mean there are three of you, after all!"

Corvus bit his bottom lip, but the corners of his mouth still perked up in a smile before he turned his body back to the fridge to put the bowl away.

" _Oh,_ here's the rest, before you close it." Gren brought over the other items, hoping to still catch the smile on Corvus' face.

"Thanks," he smiled while taking the containers, and Gren felt his heart melt a little. Corvus closed the fridge and that's when Gren realized that _he, Gren,_ was leaning into _Corvus'_ CO2 zone. Was this going to become a regular thing?

 _"Uh..."_ Gren backed away slightly, "D-do you mind if I put the lasagna in the oven?" He stepped closer to the glass container, "We don't have to turn it on, but it'll keep it warm. Or maybe back in the bag? It's insulated…"

Corvus let out a breath and nodded, "Here, let me put the oven on warm. We'll keep it there." He pressed a few buttons and after removing the lid Corvus carefully placed the glass dish in the oven. "Well," he set the oven mitts to the side, "since we have a little time, would you like a tour of the apartment?" he asked with an undertone of excitement.

"Definitely!"

"Great!" Corvus loosely took Gren's hand and led him towards the shorter hallway.

Gren felt buoyant; it's not like their fingers were intertwined - just hands cupped together - but it filled him with a new burst of energy and he tightened the grip a little.

"This is Sabah's part of the apartment. Here's her door," he gestured accordingly then turned around to look at the space next to the kitchen, "and here's her bathroom. Overall, not too exciting for you as a guest," Corvus smiled.

Gren smiled back at Corvus - maybe not, but he was still enjoying the tour.

Corvus led him to the area between the kitchen and living room. "This," he gestured widely, "Is our living room and kitchen. Believe it or not, the couches and entertainment stand _came with_ our apartment!" he showed off proudly.

"Nice!"

"Yes, our tuition money - hard at work," Corvus grinned and Gren couldn't help but laugh at the joke.

Corvus seemed pleased and fully faced him, letting go of their joint hands, "Also, fun fact: I figured out that basically the length of this apartment is in fifths, and they used the space of two rooms to make this area," he explain, gesticulating with his hands for length, dividing, and combining the two rooms.

"Huh, that is interesting. I kinda thought three bedrooms for a college apartment was an odd number."

"Same! I guess they mix up three- and four-bedroom apartments within a floor to better use the space. It was like a puzzle of building layout efficiency."

Gren felt his cheeks smile wider, for some reason Corvus treating the otherwise passing question about why the school had three bedroom apartments as a puzzle felt very much like him. Gren glanced back at their unconnected hands; they'd never held hands before, but...why did he already miss that connection?

As if having the same thought, Corvus recupped their hands and led him to the longer hallway.  
"The first room is Kazi's, across from Kazi's bedroom is the bathroom we want guests to use. Oh! But be aware that there's a Jack-and-Jill door inside the bathroom to the shower room next door, make sure that's locked."

"You have a separate shower room?" Gren raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

"Well, some cultures feel like the toilet and shower shouldn't be in the same place, and since Queens' Unity is so diverse, getting students from all countries elven and human alike, they wanted to cover their bases. Sabah's bathroom has a toilet and bath/shower combo though. But, I think it works out. A guest can still use the bathroom even if Kazi or I am in the shower next to it."

Gren nodded, "Good point."

Corvus flashed another thousand watt smile, as he started leading Gren further down the hall. "You have no idea how excited I am to _not_ use a freshman dorm shower anymore! Every time I showered I felt like I was back in the high school locker room. Oh!" he stopped suddenly to point at a small door, "Here's a closet - Gren we have **_so much_** more room now!" he beamed, "And speaking of…" He now led him into the last room left unexplored. "Here's my room!" The _ta-da_ was evident in his tone.

Gren looked around in awe, the room was extremely neat and well kept, with only a few unpacked boxes in the back right corner. Corvus' desk was towards the back facing the windows, his bed was to the left, a dresser and short empty bookshelf to the right, and next to the door a small closet. It wasn't very wide, but it didn't feel cramped either.

Reluctantly he let go of Corvus' hand, walking deeper into his world. "Corvus...This looks great! Wow. You're mostly set up. Look at your desk," he said while turning to face Corvus.

Corvus grinned widely, "Yup. Although, I doubt I'll be using it _too much_ since we'll be studying together most of the time."

Gren felt a light blush spread across his cheeks, "Yes, that's true," he smiled shyly before returning back to the desk area, looking out the window - a beautiful view of lush forest trees - then to the pictures pinned to a cork board nearby. He recognized Chlo and Asha from their video chat earlier in the summer. Corvus' parents were pretty easy to identify and Gren noted how Corvus took after his mom in terms of facial features and structure but had his father's strong frame and body type. Another picture caught his eye: a selfie of Corvus with two Sunfire elves.

"This must be Kazi and Sabah!" Gren said excitedly. "I can't believe I never really saw a picture of them up until now," he half-laughed.

Corvus approached his side, "Yeah, that's them. Well...I'm not exactly the type of guy that remembers to stop and take photos. Kazi actually thought to take the photo and Sabah insisted that Kazi joined it."

Gren looked more closely, both Corvus and one of the Sunfire elves were dressed up very nicely. "The one in the red and gold dress must be Sabah? And the one with the glasses is Kazi?" Gren asked.

He could see Corvus nod in his peripheral vision, suddenly aware of how close they were again, "Yup."

In the picture Corvus was dressed up too. He was aware that each of the military branches had formal wear (he had heard Embla talking of her "formal whites" before), but Gren hadn't actually been to any events where he would see the Katolis army's "formal blues". And Corvus' attire in the picture looked _formal,_ with Corvus wearing a dark blue jacket with satin lapels, an army blue bow-tie, an insignia of some kind on the left side, and were those cufflinks? Corvus looked handsome, _really_ handsome, and the relaxed smile on his face certainly contributed to that as well.

"Your uniform really suits you. Striking. You definitely command a presence. You're going to be a natural leader once you graduate," Gren said while turning to face Corvus who seemed a little flustered.

"Thanks…" Corvus looked away and scratched the back of his neck. "That's not my regular uniform though. That's my mess dress, for special occasions."

Gren laughed, "I figured. Embla talks about hers sometimes too."

Corvus scratched the back of his neck again, "That makes sense. I'm not sure I have the same, y'know, _presence_ in my regular uniform."

Gren bonked the side of his head against Corvus' - he figured he might as well since they were so close and Corvus was obviously being overly modest. "I have no doubt that you do. Maybe I'll get to see you on inspection day this year?" Gren sounded more hopeful than he meant to. ROTC cadets wore their uniform on campus on inspection day once a week. Last semester it didn't fall on a day when they met up, this year Gren was hoping to meet up more often and that he'd be able to see Corvus in uniform.

Corvus bit back a smile, "Yeah, maybe?" He sounded surprisingly bashful, " _Umm…_ Y'know, Kazi took the picture because I was taking Sabah to the military ball."

Gren returned back to the photo, now looking at Sabah's red and gold dress more closely - definitely representing Sunfire elf designs but there were some Katolian embroidery designs in there as well. Come to think of it, the royal colors of the Katolis family and the colors of the Sunfire elf nation matched perfectly. "Sabah looks gorgeous! She also looks thrilled to go."

" _Heh,_ yeah...Sabah likes a good party. She hadn't declared a major so I figured talking with other people in the ROTC unit might give her different ideas. She seemed to enjoy herself."

Gren leaned back, "That makes sense. That was nice of you."

"It worked out well, I could only take one date and Kazi hates large crowds anyways." Gren could feel Corvus' gaze on him and fully turned around to meet his eyes, "I mean, it's not exactly meeting two of the highest ranking generals in our country, but it's a good networking opportunity, especially with military personnel. I was actually hoping to take you, but y'know 21 credits last semester…"

Gren nodded in understanding.

Corvus looked down and straightened out the pens sitting on his desk. "Maybe this upcoming spring you could pencil it in?" he hesitantly looked up.

Gren felt a rush of heat bloom in his cheeks, "I would love to go with you! And what a great professional opportunity, thank you, but wouldn't Sabah be disappointed?"

Corvus smiled and returned back to arranging the pens and straightening the notepad on his desk, "Sabah had a good time and all, but I think she was happy to only go just that once. She would be more than understanding if you went instead."

"Okay then, if you're sure…This spring, right?"

Corvus nodded.

"Then it's a date!" Gren said brightly.

Corvus' eyes went a little wide but then he turned and faced Gren, his whole face beaming, "Yeah! It's a date."

"We're home!" Gren heard someone shout politely.

"Whoa! What smells so good?" another voice said.

Corvus' eyes turned excited as he looked at Gren, "You ready to meet Kazi and Sabah?"

Gren took a deep breath, steeled his nerves and nodded.

Corvus took Gren's hand again and led him back to the hallway. Not like Gren _needed_ to be led, but he wasn't going to complain. A little hand holding for emotional support never hurt, he figured.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.
> 
> I don’t know who is reading this story at this point, but please stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. ❤️  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_  
>  \- Unknown
> 
> * * *
> 
> **Chapter Doodles:**   
> 


	15. Connecting Worlds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It still baffled Corvus that Gren could be close friends with two high ranking and well respected generals like General Amaya and General Janai, but get so nervous over meeting his roommates.

_“Then it’s a date!”_ Gren’s words echoed in his head, his face bright, cheeks adorably pink behind his freckles, and Corvus could tell by the way his own cheeks hurt from smiling that this wasn’t a dream.

He felt elated, ecstatic, buoyant even. Like he was back in high school and had just asked his boyfriend out to Junior Prom and received a yes. Except this excitement also felt _different_ from high school, maybe because this wasn’t someone he was _already seeing_ \- it was _Gren. Gren_ not only said _yes_ to a dance an _entire semester and a half away,_ but more so called it _“a date”_ \- a word Corvus made a _conscious point_ in _never_ using with Gren. They had frequently made _plans_ but “date” felt different when associated with Gren - it always carried a certain weight, and even if Gren didn’t mean a _date_ -date (which Corvus was sure he probably didn’t) it still made him happier than he would’ve imagined when he heard the words come out of Gren’s mouth and said with such enthusiasm.

“Yeah! It’s a date,” he replied, trying to sound casual about it despite his racing heart.

“We’re home!” Corvus somewhat registered Kazi’s voice, but Gren’s eyes turned wide, almost acutely aware of the new voices.

“Whoa! What smells so good?” he heard Sabah’s voice.

Corvus grew impossibly more excited. “You ready to meet Kazi and Sabah?” he all but beamed.

Gren took a deep breath, and nodded.

New adrenaline pumping through him gave him the courage to take Gren’s hand again. Giving it a comforting squeeze, Corvus gleefully led him back towards the hallway and to the front entrance.

Kazi and Sabah had just finished taking off their shoes when they reached them, three bags of textbooks placed just to the left of the shoe rack. 

“Welcome back. How was the book store?” Corvus greeted his roommates.

“ _Urg,_ busy. You were smart going last week, even if they didn’t have all of your textbooks,” Sabah said, placing her shoes on the rack, “Oh! Are these shoes..?” Corvus could see Kazi nudge Sabah’s side and she quickly straightened up.

Corvus gave Gren’s hand one last squeeze before letting go. “Kazi, Sabah, this is Gren. Student extraordinaire and bringer of lasagna,” he gestured accordingly.

Gren flustered, but nodded his head in greeting, “Hi, I’m Gren, and I hope you both enjoy dinner. I-it is polite and customary to bring a meal when people move into a new place. A-and you have a lovely apartment! From what I understand, it was well earned.” 

It still baffled Corvus that Gren could be close friends with two high ranking and well respected generals like General Amaya and General Janai, but get so nervous over meeting his roommates. He moved closer, bumping Gren’s shoulder with a grin - despite Gren’s nerves, he did great. 

Sabah stiffened up but smiled, “Hi, Gren. I’m Sabah. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

Gren straightened up and seemed a little taken aback. 

_Yes, Gren, finally meet you. I hope that’s sinking in._ Corvus thought with a smile.

“Hi Gren. I’m Kazi,” Kazi waved with a small smile.  
“I’ve heard so many positive things about you. I’m glad we’re finally meeting,” Kazi signed in KSL and Corvus could visibly see Gren get excited.

“It’s nice to meet you too! I didn’t realize you signed. Corvus never mentioned that, although he mentioned you were a Language Major,” Gren signed back and Corvus was feeling quite proud of himself for how well he was keeping up with the signed conversation - he still had at least another year of KSL classes to go.

“I can’t imagine why Corvus would never mention that I know KSL,” Kazi laughed - no doubt not wanting to exclude Sabah from an entire conversation.

Wait!... _Oh, yeah_ …about that...it’s not that he was _avoiding_ mentioning it per se, but he was hoping to at least _delay_ it because it was likely that Gren would draw the same question Sabah had quickly figured out last December.

Sabah must’ve been thinking the same thing, because she let out what Corvus recognized as her nervous-laugh but caught herself and turned around. “I’m going to,” she brought up the back of her hand and suppressed another giggle, “check the lasagna. Oven, right?” she looked at Corvus. She was offering him an out, but Corvus felt too nervous to leave the conversation. He checked Gren’s expression, could see him connect the dots and the question already starting to form in his head.

Gren turned to Corvus, face genuinely confused, “Wait, Corvus, if your roommate knew KSL why didn’t you ask them for help?” He paused, then his eyes went wide as though Gren just realized something, “A-Although, don’t get me wrong! I was happy to help! It was really nice actually seeing someone during office hours, and well...” Gren left the sentence hanging, his face flushed and oddly unreadable.

Corvus gave a quick glance to Kazi, “ _Umm!_ Well…”

“It was our first semester in college and I was very busy with classes,” Kazi explained, “Corvus wanted me to focus on my studies.”

Corvus studied Gren’s face, his blue eyes darting back and forth - processing, then the same look of realization as earlier, “Oh! That makes sense. Sounds like Corvus.” Gren now bumped Corvus’ shoulder with a big smile on his face.

 _Thank you, Kazi._ Corvus tried to convey with his eyes. “ _Umm_ …I’m going to help Sabah with the _uhh_ …lasagna. Kazi and Gren can you take care of setting the table, well, bar?”

“Sure!” Kazi jumped in eagerly, probably sensing Corvus’ small SOS. “Gren, let me show you where everything is…”

Corvus walked next to Sabah, who had turned on the oven light and was peeking in, then he let out a breath of relief. This distance was not nearly as out of ear shot as he would like, but it worked as long as they kept their voices low.

“The first thing he does is figure out and call you out on your KSL fib?” she teased in a whisper. “I already liked him for making you happy, but I like him _So Much More_ now,” she grinned, stood up and leaned back against the counter.

Corvus put on two oven mitts, let out a small smile, and opened the oven. “Thankfully, Kazi is much better at improvising than you. I do appreciate the out though, and you holding in as much of your laughter as you did - I know how you get when you get nervous,” he teased with a wink, in his mind an image of Sabah beautifully dressed up but nervously laughing as she was introduced to several men and women she thought were ‘attractive’ during the military ball, then later beating herself up about her ‘bad habit’. 

Although Corvus wouldn’t go so far as to call it a ‘bad’ habit. Sabah had a nice laugh, and with her typical outgoing nature, he figured somewhere along the line she picked up the practice to make others feel more at ease around her, and it typically did. However, he could see the disadvantages of it too. During a freshman social last year there had been a guy hitting on her that she clearly wasn’t into but she was so nervous that she just kept giggling. Even though Sabah’s body was completely tense and rigid, the guy took her laughter as a sign of her being interested in him and kept moving into her personal space until Corvus stepped in, put his arm around her, and pretended to be her boyfriend to get her out of the situation. He thought maybe everyone should take KSL to learn more about what body language communicates, or at least a class on body language, because there’s so much communicated that goes unsaid or contradicts our spoken words.

“Truthfully, I’m sorry for not holding it in better,” Sabah said, bringing Corvus out of his thoughts. Her voice sounded a little dejected, but she quickly smiled when she noticed Corvus was looking at her. “He seemed a little nervous, but Kazi signing seemed to make him feel at ease. I’m glad.”

Corvus took the glass dish out and placed it on the stove top. “ _You_ seemed nervous too,” he looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

She nodded with a small shrug, “Well, he _is_ important to you, so it’s natural to feel a little nervous. But Kazi’s completely at ease. Which is odd because when it comes to the three of us meeting new people, usually I’m the outgoing one and Kazi is the one who is nervous,” she looked over towards Kazi, who was arranging napkins (well, paper towels), forks, and plates with Gren at their breakfast bar since they didn’t have a dining table.

Corvus walked to the fridge, grabbed one of the two halves of bread, stuck it in the oven, and set a timer for five minutes. “As impossible as it may seem, I think Kazi heard me talk about Gren more than you did, so they might have a better idea of what to expect. Plus, I think Kazi instinctively knows that the two of them are cut from the same cloth,” Corvus said, still keeping his voice low.

Sabah turned and raised an eyebrow at the idiom.

“That they’re alike, kindred spirits of sorts,” Corvus clarified.

“Ah!” Sabah nodded, readjusting her resting position against the counter, “That makes sense. Two hotcats of a feather, so to speak.”

Corvus half-laughed, thankfully knowing that typical Sunfire elf idiom, “Yes, exactly.” 

The full phrase was ‘ _hotcats of a feather pride together_ ’ meaning those with similar values and beliefs hung out together, but it was common for native speakers to shorten it and add a number, typically two or three, specifically meaning those people were alike. Technically, Corvus was hoping both his group and Gren’s group would all be ‘hotcats of a feather’ as a whole, and they could all enjoy hanging out, but that might be too much to ask.

Sabah watched Kazi and Gren pull out the salad bowl and several containers from the fridge. “Wait, didn’t you just put some bread in the oven to warm up?” she asked, a little skeptical.

Corvus grinned, already predicting where this was going, “Yup.”

Sabah fully faced him, “Exactly how much food did Gren bring?”

Corvus let out a full hearty laugh, “Oh, you have _no_ idea!”

* * *

Dinner went well; Sabah joined Gren and Kazi in setting the breakfast bar with all the needed bowls and utensils, as well joining in on their conversation. In fact, the three of them were so caught up that by the time they sat down to eat both Kazi and Sabah sat on either side of Gren. When both of them realized this they instantly froze up and looked at Corvus with wide, apologetic eyes - like one of them stole his seat. Corvus smiled and waved it off - genuinely happy the three of them were hitting it off, as well as grateful that Gren didn’t seem to catch their sudden change in body language.

The lasagna tasted great, and both Kazi and Corvus made sure to add some of the extra meat that Gren cooked since he went through the trouble, whereas Sabah appreciated that Gren made it vegetarian. When it came to the jello, Corvus could feel Gren’s eyes studying him, which made him a little nervous because he wasn’t sure if his reaction would live up to Gren’s expectations.

Taking a bite, Corvus’ face brightened - _it was delicious._ It was sweet, but not overly sweet like some jellos, and while he could chew on the clementine slices, he couldn’t isolate the carrot shavings. In fact, if it wasn’t for Gren’s ingredient list he wouldn’t have known that carrots were the curled slivering because he couldn’t taste them. Corvus added another serving to his plate, but then remembered Gren’s burrowing eyes and looked up towards him to find that Gren had resumed his conversation with Kazi and Sabah.

However, in addition to his wide smile, he seemed to have an extra twinkle in his blue eyes - if Corvus had to guess, he’d guess his reaction was the one Gren was hoping to see. Corvus looked at the jello again, _right, this was his mother’s recipe wasn’t it?_ Corvus took another bite with a small smile, it was nice that they were starting to connect in these smaller ways.

After picking up the dishes and stacking them in the sink, Sabah called out before Gren could even think about offering to help with washing them - he had already helped Corvus put the food away.

“Gren! We were thinking of playing _Overcooked 2_ , have you played it?”

Gren looked at Corvus, dirty plate still in hand, “But I want to help with the-”

Corvus took the dish with a grin. “Go. Sabah was looking forward to playing this with you _all day_. It’s one of her favorite Switch games,” he said gently.

Gren straightened up, like Corvus suddenly gave him an important quest, and nodded, but hesitated before leaving. “ _Umm_...Thanks, by the way, for hosting,” he gently bumped Corvus’ shoulder with his own, “I’m having a really good time.”

Corvus smiled but kept his eyes fixed on rinsing one of the plates in the sink. “I’m glad. I’m having a good time too,” he said.

He risked a glance in Gren’s direction, a little nervous about the effects it would have on his heart. Of course Gren was smiling warmly, a softness in his light blue eyes and a faint blush under his freckles but not yet fully camouflaging them like earlier in the evening. Corvus could feel himself start to melt.

“Oh! They added hotcats to the possible chefs!” Kazi said with glee. Both Gren and Corvus looked towards the pair of Sunfire elves.

“Sweet! And a shadowpaw and banther! I wonder if there was some sort of ‘cat’ update...”

Corvus chuckled and bumped Gren’s shoulder back, “Go, I’ll be there after dishes. There’s not many left.”

Gren smiled and nodded before walking over towards the couch, “Do they have any dogs?”

“Yes! Both floppy eared and fluffy wolves!” Corvus could hear the smile in Sabah’s voice.

He smiled to himself and went back to the dishes, giving them a quick rinse over and putting them in the dishwasher, enjoying overhearing the conversation.

Kazi’s laughter, “Sabah, you always pick the glowtoad.”

And Sabah’s laughter, “It’s so cute! It’s fun having a little grumpy glowtoad with a chef hat rolling around in a cart.”

And Gren’s laughter, “Some of these choices are too funny. Look at this pirate, I feel like he looks like me if I grow a beard and start wearing an eyepatch.” More giggles.

 _This is going well,_ Corvus continued to smile to himself, putting away the last dish.

“ _Cooooorvus!_ We’re waiting for you!” Sabah called out, sounding far too excited to actually be annoyed with him. “Here let me help. Are you going with the crow chef again?”

“Actually, I will try the shadow paw if no one else has it,” Corvus grinned as he dried his hands and made his way to the couch. Reaching over to get his controller from Sabah, Corvus sat at the closest available corner of the long couch, conveniently next to Gren.

“Okay, so Gren, this game is that Katolis phrase, _‘too many cooks in the kitchen’_ realized. We are all chefs that need to quickly make meals and get them out to the customers,” Sabah said.

“It’s all about properly communicating,” Kazi added cheerfully.

“And chaos! Total Kitchen Chaos,” Sabah added with a giggle.

“Managing chaos with proper communication?” Kazi suggested with a small laugh.

“That checks out,” Corvus said. “Gren, we are constantly calling things out. Like, ‘I need chicken’ or ‘I’ll chop it’ or ‘We need clean plates’. Actually, it’s similar to the escape room, because we tend to call clues, findings and puzzles aloud for the good of the group there.”

Kazi brightened, “True! Except that’s more puzzles!”

“Still a fair amount of chaos,” Sabah giggled with a wink towards Kazi, who was on the chair adjacent to the couch.

“Sabah,” Kazi chuckled, “Gren is going to think you revel in chaos.”

Sabah laughed, “I swear I don’t, Gren. I do revel in a good challenge though! And maybe some friendly competition.”

Gren laughed along, “That’s a lot like my both of my siblings, Embla and Askur. Although they are both very quiet in their competitiveness. As kids, the house would get eerily quiet, like they were generals plotting a battle, and they would barely speak the entire game until the very end when someone won.”

“What happened then?” asked Sabah.

“The winner would gloat...in their own way. But they handled losing very differently. For Askur, he would get frustrated and try to goad Embla into a fight. It was usually then that I would try to step in and keep the peace,” Gren chuckled a little at the end. “But when Embla lost she committed it to memory and would practice tirelessly until she could ‘secure a victory’,” Gren laughed again, “As you can imagine, games of chance were her least favorite and my brother’s favorite.”

“Wow, a fight?” Kazi said.

“It’s common among siblings,” Sabah added with a shrug.

Gren nodded, “I joke with them now that keeping the peace between them is the reason I became interested in diplomacy.”

Corvus laughed, he never knew that.

Kazi chuckled, “Well that’s a positive. Still, now I’m somehow glad I don’t have a sibling. I don’t like confrontation.”

“They can, at once, be both The Worst and The Best,” Corvus added. “‘Born frenemies’ as Asha phrased it, but I feel like, for the most part, as we get older that fighting piece lessens.”

“True,” Sabah smiled, then turned to face Gren “I like your sister’s drive, and can relate to wanting to ‘secure a victory’.” She turned towards the T.V. “Speaking of, let’s go beat some unbread!” She said it like a battle cry.

Gren leaned over, “Unbread?”

Corvus chuckled, leaned in then whispered, “That’s part of the ‘story plot', but good point...” He straightened up and returned to a normal speaking voice, “Sabah and Kazi, let’s start at the tutorial since Gren needs to get the hang of the controls.”

Both nodded and together steered the food truck back to the castle in the center. Gren played through the training, chuckled at the puns (“They used to be considered the highest form of humor!”) and, as the food truck sometimes spun in circles on the overworld map, discovered that _all four_ controllers moved the food truck when trying to go to the next level.

The more levels they played through the more fired up Sabah would get, Kazi simply laughed more - they had grown to love this game after playing with Sabah so much, and Corvus himself was starting to feel his competitive nature kick in. (“C’mon, let’s do that level _one more time._ We can get three stars.”) When Corvus would glance towards Gren he always had a smile on his face. Gren seemed more comfortable with the tasks of cleaning the dishes, putting out fires and, impressively for his first time playing it, was quickly improving on throwing chopped food directly into pots or fryers.

At some point in the game Corvus felt Gren’s shoulder touch his, and his leg touched his too. Corvus could feel his body stiffen for a moment and was hesitant to peek at Gren, like the movement would suddenly remind Gren of how close they were to each other and back away. But Gren seemed completely at ease, relaxed even, and Corvus relaxed into the touch too. If Gren wanted to lean against him during video games, he was more than fine with that.

Corvus glanced at Kazi, Sabah, and Gren, the friends who meant the most to him right now, all together and enjoying each other’s company. He smiled to himself, refocusing on the game. 

This really was a great night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.  
>  **5-Mar:** _Phew_ , the story has been reorganized and new beginning chapters added. My beta is working on beta-ing Chapters 4-5, so those will likely be updated before the next _new_ chapter. The rest of the story is outlined and about half written - there's approximately five plot concepts left - which means it could be possibly split into ten chapters. :)
> 
> * * *
> 
> I don’t know who is reading this story at this point, but please stay as safe as you can and know that you're loved. ❤️  
>  _"I love you. You're probably thinking, 'You don't even know me.' But if people can hate for no reason, I can love."_  
>  \- Unknown
> 
> * * *
> 
>  **Chapter Doodles:**  
> 


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